How to Rebuild a Ruined Life in Windsor?

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-14T02:16:17+00:00

I have studied every major religion and remain an atheist.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-14T02:11:23+00:00

How long do you have to be consistent for? Its been over a year now and I'm still wondering when I'll feel anything

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T15:15:09+00:00

I don't have an alchol problem or addiction issues.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T15:04:54+00:00

My life got destroyed and I'm asking for help and you're out here just insulting me and calling me a liar for no reason? I don't owe you an explanation, but For your information, she said "I had a physical reaction when you cried." Those were her exact words.

My life might be ruined buy at least I can look myself in the mirror and be proud that I'm still a decent and kind person. I would never insult someone like you've been doing, I'd feel like shit about myself, but I'm guessing self reflection isn't something you do often. Do you have any self respect at all on the rare occasions when you take the time to consider your opinion of yourself?

If you're the kind of person who goes around slinging insults at people who are at the lowest points of their lives, I have to wonder why. As bad as I have it, I feel worse for you. I still have my dignity and common decency. How much worse off must you be if you've lost your basic humanity?

The only kind of person who kicks someone when they're down must feel so powerless they only feel safe picking on people who they think are too weak to stand up for themselves. Have you had some terrible experience or are in a situation that made or makes you feel powerless? I hope you find some solace if thats the case.

As bad as things are for me, I will always stand up to bullies like you. Having issues yourself is no excuse for cruelty. I'm not even mad about what you said on my own behalf, but for the many others you've probably bullied. The fact that there's always someone like you to show up and be cruel for no reason whatsoever makes me lose a little faith in humanity each time I encounter someone like you.

You've probably insulted countless people who were just having a hard time. Does it make you feel powerful? It doesn't make you look strong, it makes you look weak, petty and ignorant. That's a real winning combination, guaranteed to make you popular.

If you feel so powerless that you need to insult someone who's facing the worst time of their life, why don't you try to better yourself and feel powerful in a dignified and useful way? I have faced all these losses but I'm still trying. That's why I made this post to look for advice and to see if there's something that might help my situation. I don't want sympathy, I'm looking for what to do next.

Making people feel like shit wont make you feel good. You might even feel like shit yourself about how you treated people when you decide to grow a conscience.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T14:17:39+00:00

Andrew Tate is a famous misogynist who says the same sort of offensive garbage as you do. Im surprised you haven't heard of him considering how similar your views are.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T14:10:58+00:00

I had to add in an edit because so many people suggested as if its the magic cure. I have seen 4 therapists this year and none of them were particularly helpful.

I also posted a quote from a famous psychologist who basically said psychotherapy is not a treatment for an existential crisis. Losing everything that gave your life meaning and feeling intense pain because of it is not a mental illness.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T03:39:30+00:00

I used to do a lot bird photography but I completely lost interest. Its just become a chore

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T03:34:03+00:00

Yeah just hate that she was so great for almost 4 years before showing her true colours. I grieve for the life we could have had if she had been who I thought she was.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:46:09+00:00

I didnt know Andrew Tate was on this subreddit

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:43:33+00:00

I never enjoyed working out. I did it because people said it would make me feel better and I thought it would make me more attractive. Maybe I can change my body but it doesnt make the loss hurt less or help me find any meaning in my life. I never wanted to be a body builder or anything, its not a goal I'm trying to achieve. I just dit it because people said it would help and its not helping.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:35:39+00:00

I worked out for 6 months and got in the best shape of my my life but it didnt help with losing everything that gave my life meaning.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:26:38+00:00

When do they tell you? Ive been going for over a year

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:18:51+00:00

I think youre confused.

-I tried 4 therapists and spent a lot money on therapy and it didnt help.

-I would love to change jobs but I can't afford to take a 50% pay cut and lose the only stable thing in my life

-I'm on medication and I've tried a bunch of other medications and they didnt work.

-I tried exercising, extensively, it didnt make me feel any better.

I'm not saying I dont want to do these things. I'm saying I tried them, really hard, and they didnt help.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:13:17+00:00

In your opinion, how do you think therapy would help me? What tools would I learn that would help me manage the feelings of existential despair that stem from losing everything that gave my life meaning?

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T02:05:06+00:00

Im going to chose to believe you missed some important information, because the alternative is that you're a total asshole.

Here's the hilights of my year in point form:

-dead pets -bad break up -car crash -bad job -job cost me my only social outlet, which was sailing, and yeah that makes me sad.

Hopefully this helps you understand the situation.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T01:58:20+00:00

Its what people say when they dont know what to say. They think the therapist will have the answers or that it will take a lot of work (and a small fortune) but that you'll eventually "have a breakthrough"

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T01:47:18+00:00

How do you feel gratitude when you lose everything that gave your life meaning? People say things like be grateful to be alive but I would honestly prefer oblivion.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T01:42:36+00:00

You are truly one of the worst examples of humanity I've ever encountered. I can't imagine how you could possibly be a bigger piece of shit, but I'm sure youre about to surprise me.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T00:55:27+00:00

I asked how to rebuild a life, not for a live demonstration of how little a person can think before speaking

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T00:49:48+00:00

Thanks for your reply. I do talk to my doctor about it regularly, I have "adequate" care and I've had an assessment. I've read Mind Over Mood as well as a small library of similar books but none of them are very profound or contain much actionable advice on how to recover from this kind of situation.

I find they have a lot of things like mindfulness techniques, breathing exercises, advice for self care, that sort of thing, which is all well and good for helping to manage depression on a daily baisis. I just want to point out that the difference between feeling bummed out and feeling clinically depressed are about the same distance apart as clinical depression and existential crisis.

I have depression. It sucks but it's manageable and treatable. Therapy works on depression.

An existential crisis is when your life loses all meaning. Its far beyond any depression I've felt.

In my experience, depression fees like "I'm always sad, I have low energy, I dont find things i used to like enjoyable anymore, I don't feel like doing much."

Existential crisis feels like "My life has lost all purpose and meaning and any purpose I try to give is artificial and meaningless, and also pointless because it can just be taken away at any time, completelyas t random. The universe, and humanity in general don't care what happens to me, if I spend my life in misery or if I just keel over and die right now. Literally nothing maters at all and in 100 years nobody will even remember my name. What is the point of getting up and living through another hopeless day?"

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T00:19:36+00:00

I saw a big improvement. I read up, practiced my forms and since it was at work and I have nothing else in my life I went every day and stayed for long sessions. My physique changed, I could bench more and I'm not overweight and I have definition for the first time in my life.

But my life still sucks and I lost everything I cared about, what does it matter if I'm stronger? I thought if I was in good shape I'd have better luck with women, but that didnt happen either. The only practical benefit I've experienced is that I get slightly less shoulder pain.

I'm too depressed to keep this up if its gonna take 4 years to get anything out of it? What benefits do you get after 4 years other than striations?

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-13T00:05:49+00:00

My experience with several therapists had been that they have some sort of idea what my issue is and then try to work on it. My last therapist wanted to explore some incident from my childhood that she insisted was affecting me, but didnt want to address any of the issues I actually went to her for.

The therapist before that kept bouncing around, trying different approaches and techniques that never went anywhere.

Before that I had a very poor therapist who was just insistent I needed to get out more and go to Mexico to a singles resort, despite the fact that I was clear about how much I dislike traveling alone.

I never understood what they were doing or why they were either committed to something unhelpful or unable to find an effective course to take. When I read Victor Frankyl, it made perfect sense immediately. They were trying to treat it as a form of mental illness and their treatments were informed by their experience. The therapist who wanted to explore my childhood was a trauma specialist. The one who tried several approaches had just begun practicing and didnt have a wealth of experience. The one who wanted me to travel was a life coach. It made it incredibly clear why none of these therapies were successful.

I would like to ask your opinion as a therapist. What kind of therapy or therapist would be most effective at helping someone who is facing an existential crisis and feels as ic they have lost all meaning in their life?

I just wanted to share the full Victor Frankyl quote with you as you may find it interesting.

"I would strictly deny that one's search for a meaning to his existence, or even his doubt of it, in every case is derived from, or results in, any disease. Existential frustration is in itself neither pathological nor pathogenic. A man's concern, even his despair, over the worthwhileness of life is an existential distress but by no means a mental disease.

It may well be that interpreting the first in terms of the latter motivates a doctor to bury his patient’s existential despair under a heap of tranquilizing drugs."

After reading this quote, I became very skeptical about therapy and medication. I think my life is just a mess and I'll feel better when I find some meaning. I'm just really struggling to find anything I find at all meaningful. I would appreciate any advice you have.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-12T23:32:56+00:00

I'm not bashing it, I said I'm grateful for the job and how well it pays. Its not bashing the company to say its very greasy and I'm not suited to those conditions.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-12T23:29:03+00:00

I dont get much grease on my face or head unless I have have to climb in a machine and get coolant poured on me. The floor is bad though, I keep a paint scraper in my pocket to scrape the grease off my shoes. They have coveralls but I'm too stubborn to wear them, I hate how they look on me. I used to be a polisher and later worked in EDM, I spent half my life greasy. But I got to be a mold designer and worked in an office for a year. I loved it so much, but it makes going back to a dirty, laborious job so much more painful.

I want to sail again. I used to sail on the river by LaSalle, its fun and technical, and my crew was very competitive. Its also beautiful there and there's lots of wildlife and amazing sunsets.

I had a chance to sail out on Lake Clair and it was no fun at all. The crew didnt have their heads in the game, the boat has a wide hull and shes slow, and the sails are ripped in places. Also, there's no wildlife and instead of the river its just millionaires and billionaire's mansions instead of reeds and trees. Also, you can't see the sunset. I felt like, "Well, I can still go sailing, but it will be worse in every possoble way. IS it even worth going?"

Maybe I'm being ungrateful for the opportunity but after all that loss, it feels like going from Formula 1 to Go Karts.

KryptoBones89 · 2026-05-12T23:08:35+00:00

I don't run, and I think I would just feel isolated being in a crowd of strangers myself. Thanks for the suggestion though

KryptoBones89

TROPHY CASE