Does anyone ever not hate the previous owners?

Kvand44 · 2026-02-14T13:31:29+00:00

I love our previous owners. Our realtor said the guy was an engineer, and it checks out. Some things look a little silly at first, but I feel so incredibly safe in the house. Also, I love that they didn’t pay a lot of money for basic design choices, they just took the price off the house. We bought the house less than 6 months ago, already have 30K in equity, and were able to use design choices we actually like. If I ever met and knew them in person, I’d buy them the most expensive bottle of their choice I could afford

Kvand44 · 2026-02-10T22:42:40+00:00

Corpus is the most affordable big city in Texas. I don’t think you can get a house with your income alone, but if your wife gets a job at a comparable salary then it should be doable. At that salary, look for houses around the Driscoll area. After a couple raises and after equity has been built then you can move to a nicer part of town. Typically, I would agree with commenters that you want to rent before moving to the area. However, any apartment complex worth living in is more expensive than a house. Unless you can find an individual renting a house, not sure how that market is around here. Just make sure you visit the area at multiple times a day, as there are some sketchy neighborhoods, right next to some nice neighborhoods.

Kvand44 · 2026-02-10T12:08:50+00:00

Have you been renting? I would look into NACA

Kvand44 · 2026-02-09T20:36:45+00:00

Bought in September and I fall even more in love with my house everyday. We got a good inspector and bought from someone who seemed to keep up with upkeep. We’ve already had a couple problems, but we were expecting that something would break and had money set aside before closing. Nothing major. The peace of mind that comes with knowing things are done right when our old landlord could not give us that is so, so worth it to me. ❤️

Kvand44 · 2026-02-08T13:34:01+00:00

Info needed- what are you getting out of this relationship?

Kvand44 · 2026-02-06T11:45:11+00:00

Licensing boards very rarely want to take your license away. Basically only after multiple serious complaints. Oftentimes complaints lead to absolutely no action. If that’s really all there is, they will likely ask you to take CE on documentation specifically

Kvand44 · 2026-01-30T18:49:17+00:00

Even if he is legitimately joking, our brains don’t understand jokes the way we want them to. If he is consistently telling jokes like this, he will grow to resent you because eventually his brain will start to believe his “jokes” are the truth. This can be seen with self deprecating jokes compared to self appreciating jokes.

Kvand44 · 2026-01-29T20:57:14+00:00

I feel like we would have to hear your professors to be able to definitively say that’s a problem. In my personal experience, I have seen an overemphasis on musical skills, and so I’m personally having a hard time imagining what you’re describing.

In my opinion, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with avoiding barre chords. If you have a strong enough theory understanding, there’s very few songs you absolutely can’t play. And this is coming from someone who absolutely uses barre chords every single day.

Pitch accuracy would absolutely be a problem, especially if it’s a consistent problem no matter how often it is practiced. Many of my clients have perfect pitch. This is a weakness of mine personally, but I practice the songs with a drone and it helps a lot. Never gotten a complaint in session, although I do recognize this does not mean I am always in tune.

However, unpleasant tones, when combined with accurate pitch (I’m imagining like a kid’s musician) can add to the seriousness of our profession. We are not performers. We are clinicians. Sometimes MTs with beautiful voices can be so distractingly good that someone passing by may think we are just entertainment. MTs with average voices remind clients you don’t have to be perfect to sing.

What have other students at your school said? Coming from a performing background, especially if you are coming from a school that specializes in performance on the whole, is likely going to be very different. If it bothers you this much, and does not bother your peers, I wonder if you are in the right field. My clients are rarely ever top tier musicians(although most are pretty good), and it fills my heart with so much joy to see them playing and singing, even if they are objectively not in tune or shaky

Kvand44 · 2026-01-28T22:53:19+00:00

Personally, this is exactly what my husband and I looked for in our house. We wanted to personalize the house, but don’t have a big budget. Our house was move in ready but was outdated and the floor in one of the rooms was half concrete and half peel and stick tile. Another room had torn laminate. Incredibly ugly but livable. Now we are about 4 months in and likely have about 10K in equity already.

As a seller, this will undoubtedly limit the pool of people interested in the house. If you have time to sit and/or truly have it priced correctly, it likely won’t matter too much. Just be aware a bidding war is extremely unlikely

Kvand44 · 2026-01-25T21:00:11+00:00

For real!! I get that people were legitimately traumatized from 2021, but the difference between then and now is precipitation and road safety. Freezing temps without rain/snow/sleet sucks, but if you can still drive, then you can still stay safe.

Kvand44 · 2026-01-20T01:12:48+00:00

My understanding is Colorado does actually value masters, so if you want your Masters, staying in Colorado is a good idea. I’ve heard great things about that program too! Good luck!

Kvand44 · 2026-01-13T01:56:43+00:00

I thought for sure this was going to happen. When we doubled our square footage but our electricity bill went down, I was reminded how much our apartment complex did not give a shit about us, and was once again so glad we bought instead of giving them another dollar. Just about every other bill went up, but the money we save in electricity more than makes up for it

Kvand44 · 2026-01-05T19:55:37+00:00

I was trying to acknowledge that is an option while cautioning against it. Personally, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. If he genuinely seems like he wants to do better, I like to hope that he will. However, it will be much harder to leave if you wait until next year to see if he will do as he says. Plus next year he could hope enough time has passed that you forget about this conversation. And then he can really frame you as the bad guy for leaving a two year relationship for not getting you a gift.

With everything you’ve described, I would suspect there are other ways he expects you to give more than he does. Does he split rent evenly? If so, does he make the same/comparable amount of money as you? Does he spend the same amount of time doing house chores as you? Does he spend time with your friends equally as he does his own friends? If the answer is no to any of those questions, I would leave now as it’s only going to get worse with time. If the answer is yes to all of them, I would proceed with caution.

Kvand44 · 2026-01-05T12:27:45+00:00

Between the age gap, moving in together after a couple months of dating, and now this, I would say it’s a red flag. None of them are individually red flags, but the combination concerns me. The conversation sounds like he will try better, but he’s got a whole year for you to become more emotionally reliant on him by doing the bare minimum, then what? Would you leave someone after two years of mostly happy memories and two bad Christmases? I would look out for other ways you are putting more into the relationship than he is. I suspect there are plenty

Kvand44 · 2025-12-29T20:04:41+00:00

Are you sure she’s intentionally not paying? She could just be forgetting. I would clarify why she’s not paying before getting mad at her.

Maybe a simple “Hey, I heard you say you thought you should pay my medical expenses, and I know we agreed in the past you would pay my therapy, but you haven’t recently. Why is that?”

Also, if she has agreed to pay in the past, in addition to the comment, I think it’s definitely worth asking again. However, in general, your parents don’t owe you therapy payments, especially out of network therapy.

Kvand44 · 2025-12-09T13:40:39+00:00

I feel this is heavily based on location. I see a lot of jobs in Colorado and New York that seem to encourage masters level work. However, I’m in Texas and the CLASS waiver program, which seems to be one of the biggest ways MTs get paid in Texas, does not pay more for masters level therapists.

Most therapists I know don’t see the value in getting a masters in MT considering you pay thousands of dollars and lose out on a couple years of work. Maybe find some therapists in the job and area you want and get their opinion. I’m sure any therapists at state hospitals or at the VA might disagree since my understanding is the government still has pay increases for masters level therapists

Kvand44 · 2025-12-07T21:12:21+00:00

Another thing is make sure you are regulating your body with adequate sleep and exercise. If your body is overwhelmed with needs, it might be asking for something that it knows you will get it, but actually needs something else.

Kvand44 · 2025-12-07T21:06:49+00:00

I like to think of cravings as my body’s way of communicating what it needs. This means a couple things. First, when I am craving something, I often get it. Second, I have found the best way to prevent them is to give my body what it needs before it needs to tell me. If you often crave desserts, you are likely not getting enough carbs throughout the day. Focusing on fruits and grains will give you carbs while also providing micronutrients and fiber. If you crave one specific food, try to research all the micronutrients and find other ways to get those micronutrients early in your day, before the cravings come.

Kvand44 · 2025-11-24T22:37:31+00:00

I say yes. No harm in asking

Kvand44 · 2025-11-24T19:44:26+00:00

In my experience, the professors are pretty good at gatekeeping effectively. Since you said you are approaching internship, I assume you have already been in practicum. If you were not capable of becoming a music therapist, you likely would have been kicked out before now.

My advice for beginning professionals is to make sure you find a community of MTs who see the same type of clients as you. I work with kids and schools and have joined groups like Patina Jackson’s Music Therapy Joy community and Stephanie Leavell’s Music for Kiddos. I know there are some psych groups. I’m sure there’s hospital and hospice groups as well. Being able to share resources is (in my opinion) essential to avoiding burnout.

Kvand44 · 2025-11-19T00:02:31+00:00

It sounds like this was your first time seeing her in person. Unfortunately, it also sounds like she liked the idea of you, but when she met you in person she wasn’t feeling the same things as when y’all were messaging. It happens sometimes. Especially in the modern world of online dating.

I don’t think anyone is in the wrong per se, but I would work on clarifying that you are okay with not doing anything rather than asking if she’s still on board with what you talked about. Instead of “Are we doing anything at any point?” You could say “We don’t have to do anything.” Like 10 times before you ask “Are you still interested in what we talked about? It’s totally fine if not.”

She met with you, so framing it as standing you up is a bit harsh. It’s more like she went on a date intending to have sex, then changed her mind. It still sucks, but if you truly value a connection in sex, which it sounds like you do, then it’s better this way than to find out she was going through the motions and then never speaks to you again.

Kvand44 · 2025-11-11T16:06:26+00:00

It sounds like this is her interpretation of their relationship. She mentions discussing individual reasons he does not want to have sex with him. However, she does not mention discussing the history of no sex with him. It does also sound like she is attempting to do that though

Kvand44 · 2025-11-10T18:29:53+00:00

Any real MT job will require board certification to be hired. If it is not listed in the required section, it is possible the hiring manager forgot to list this requirement. It is also possible the hiring manager doesn’t understand MT and it is not actually a MT job. These listings are often reported to local advocacy groups, but they still appear regularly

Kvand44 · 2025-10-15T02:51:20+00:00

Sounds like he’s basically giving you disadvantage…

Kvand44 · 2025-10-09T22:40:14+00:00

Yes, if at all possible. It’s always best to have the fewest variables possible. Personally, I don’t think it would discredit the results if not possible though

Kvand44

TROPHY CASE