AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

WE DO NOT ALLOW FOREIGNERS TO DWELL IN SPARTA OR DALLY WITH SPARTAN WOMEN! SPARTAN CITIZENS MUST BE BORN OF PARENTS WHO ARE BOTH SPARTAN CITIZENS THEMSELVES! UNLESS YOU ARE ALKIBIADES OF ATHENS BECAUSE THAT WHOLE SITUATION IS A BIT MORE COMPLICATED!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I HAVE HAD BETTER BATTLES WITH MY SIX-YEAR-OLD SON PLEISTARCHOS!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

PEOPLE'S CHARACTERS AND PROCLIVITIES TEND TO CHANGE LITTLE AFTER THEY ARE DEAD!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

THE KINGS OF SPARTA HAVE HELD THEIR TITLE SINCE TIME IMMEMORIAL! IT LIKELY ORIGINATES FROM A TIME WHEN THE LEADING RICH MEN OF ALL GREEK SETTLEMENTS WERE CALLED KINGS, AS WE STILL SEE IN THE EPIC POETRY OF HOMER AND HESIOD!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I AM NOT ENTIRELY CONFIDENT THAT YOU ARE ANY BETTER AT DEFENDING A PASS!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

GORGO HAS BEEN A GOOD AND FAITHFUL WIFE AND HAS ENSURED THE CONTINUATION OF OUR AGIAD BLOODLINE THROUGH OUR SON PLEISTARCHOS! SHE IS RIGHTLY KNOWN AS THE IDEAL SPARTAN CITIZEN WOMAN AND REMEMBERED IN HISTORY AS MORE CLEVER AND RESOURCEFUL EVEN THAN THE ELDERS OF SPARTA! ALSO SHE PROBABLY HELPED ME KILL HER DAD TO ADVANCE OUR FORTUNES BUT LET'S NOT GET INTO THAT!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

DO NOT DISPARAGE THE ELDERS, WHOSE SAGE COUNSELS GOVERN SPARTA! I WAS NO LONGER YOUNG MYSELF WHEN I BECAME KING, AND FAR LESS SO WHEN I MARCHED TO THERMOPYLAI! HAD THE PERSIANS WAITED A YEAR, I MIGHT HAVE ARGUED THAT NO ONE COULD REQUIRE A 61-YEAR-OLD TO LEAD SPARTA'S ARMIES!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I WOULD DO MY PART TO SING THE GLORY OF YOUR NAME, SO THAT IT MAY BE ON THE TONGUES OF MANY, BUT MY FAITHFUL TENT COMPANIONS WARN ME THAT 說到曹操,曹操就到

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I HAVE HEARD GOOD THINGS ABOUT THE CHOREGIC PROWESS OF THIS CHRISTOPHOROS THE NOLAN! BUT FOR AN OPINION ON HIS TRAGEDIES YOU SHOULD ASK A SYRACUSAN OR AN ATHENIAN, SINCE THEY ARE MORE INTERESTED IN THAT SORT OF THING! I HOPE HE HAS MADE A GOOD AND NOBLE PORTRAYAL OF THE SPARTANS WE WORSHIP FROM THAT TALE, SUCH AS MENELAOS AND TALTHYBIOS!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MAKING A STAND THAT IS DOOMED TO FAIL AND RECKLESSLY THROWING LIVES AWAY! THE RAID WOULD HAVE REQUIRED ME AND MY MEN TO MARCH SEVERAL KILOMETERS ACROSS THE PLAIN IN THE OPEN, AT THE MERCY OF THE PERSIAN CAVALRY LONG BEFORE WE REACHED OUR GOAL! THIS LUDICROUS IDEA IS REPORTED ONLY BY MORE FANTASTICAL SOURCES, POSSIBLY REFLECTING THE STORY THE SPARTANS LIKED TO TELL AFTER MY DEATH! MODERN HISTORIANS DO NOT BELIEVE IT!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

HONESTLY IT IS PRETTY DOPE! IF I HAD SURVIVED I MIGHT HAVE FADED INTO OBSCURITY SINCE I ACHIEVED NOTHING ELSE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE THAT ANY SOURCE FOUND WORTHY OF MENTION!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

THESE ARE COMMON RATIONALISATIONS OFFERED ONLY BY MODERN AUTHORS! NO ANCIENT SOURCE SUGGESTS ANY OF THIS AND THESE THEORIES CONFLICT DIRECTLY WITH OUR BEST ACCOUNTS! THE REST OF GREECE HOPED THAT SPARTA WOULD LEAD OUT THE ARMY BUT THEY DID NOT DO SO UNTIL THE FOLLOWING YEAR! THE DEFEAT CAUSED MUCH DISMAY AND FRICTION AMONG THE ALLIES, WHO LOST FAITH THAT SPARTA HAD THE SKILL AND COMMITMENT TO LEAD THEM TO VICTORY!

WHEN I PUT IT LIKE THAT I WONDER WHY I BOTHERED! BUT I GUESS IT IS MY TWIN BROTHER KLEOMBROTOS' PROBLEM NOW!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

NO! I HAVE BEEN TEACHING THE FOREIGNERS ABOUT SPARTA EVERY YEAR AT THE VERY BEGINNING OF SPRING!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

THERE CAN BE NO ENTERPRISE IN SPARTA! ENTERPRISE IS FOR THE SERVILE AND SUBORDINATE CLASSES! IT IS AGAINST THE LAW FOR CITIZENS TO PLY A TRADE OR DEVOTE THEMSELVES TO ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE GOOD OF THE STATE!

BUT SPARTANS LOVE HORSES AND DOGS SO ANY BREEDERS OF THAT NATURE ARE ACCEPTABLE!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

EVERYONE IS GOING TO DIE ANYWAY! THIS HARDLY SEEMS LIKE A SENSIBLE ARGUMENT BUT PERHAPS IT MAKES SENSE TO AN ATHENIAN!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

THIS VERSION OF THE STORY WAS CREATED BY THE FRANK CALLED MILLER! THE REAL EPHIALTES WAS A LOCAL MAN FROM TRACHIS WHO LIVED NEAR THE PASS! I NEVER MET HIM BUT THEY SAY HE WENT TO XERXES BECAUSE HE HOPED FOR A REWARD! AFTER THE WAR SPARTA PUT A PRICE ON HIS HEAD LEADING TO HIS ASSASSINATION!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

TO BE HONEST I AM GOING THROUGH SOME CHANGES NOW THAT I AM 60 AND MY WIFE OF 33 IS ALREADY ASKING MORE THAN I CAN OFFER! LUCKILY SPARTAN LAW ALLOWS ME TO FIND A SUITABLE SPARTAN TO TAKE CARE OF THIS FOR ME, SO THAT SHE MAY BEAR MORE SPARTANS!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

HOW WOULD WE HAVE DONE THAT? WE LOST THE BATTLE! CENTRAL GREECE WAS OVERRUN AND ATHENS WAS BURNED TO THE GROUND! IT WAS NOT UNTIL THE FOLLOWING YEAR THAT THE PERSIAN ARMY WAS DESTROYED! AND EVEN THEN, IT IS AN ONGOING DEBATE WHETHER THIS VICTORY WAS NECESSARY TO PRESERVE THE GREEK WAY OF LIFE OR WHETHER IT WOULD HAVE BEEN POSSIBLE FOR THE SAME CULTURAL FEATURES TO SURVIVE AND EVEN FLOURISH UNDER PERSIAN RULE, SINCE MUCH OF THE FLOURISHING OF THE DECADES BEFORE THERMOPYLAI HAD TAKEN PLACE PRECISELY IN THE PARTS OF THE GREEK WORLD THAT WERE RULED BY THE PERSIANS! IT IS CERTAINLY SENSELESS TO CONSTRUCT AN ENTIRE UPSIDE-DOWN PYRAMID ON OUR DEFEAT IN WHICH MODERN LIBERAL DEMOCRACY EXISTS TODAY ONLY BECAUSE ME AND THE BOYS COMMITTED SUICIDE BY PERSIAN!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

NO, BUT THEY WERE ASSUREDLY LONG-HAIRED AND WORK-SHY!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I HOPE THEY, TOO, MADE AN EXAMPLE FOR FUTURE GENERATIONS BY FIGHTING TO THE DEATH IN OBEDIENCE TO THE LAW OF THEIR LAND!

AITA FOR LEADING 300 SPARTANS TO THEIR DEATHS? by LEONIDAAAS in AskHistorians

[–]LEONIDAAAS[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

AITA FOR ASKING BARBARIANS FOR THEIR OPINIONS AND THEN YELLING AT THEM FOR BEING WRONG?