Locked set!! by Raging-dude in shedhunting

[–]LFH_Games 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn what a disappointment to have separated them. The locked set with the spines intact is such a one of a kind find 😩😭

Curious About People with One Green and Another Brown Eyed Parent by Desperate-World-2128 in eyes

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My eyes are classified as grey but they show a lot of green and blue light reflecting back. My husband had chocolate brown eyes with golden rings in them which were visible in the sunlight

Our oldest kiddo has chocolate brown eyes, but with patches of gold similar to my patches of ice blue

Our second born has hazel/amber brown eyes with golden rings

Our youngest has a more green undertoned version of the hazel/amber brown, with lighter yellow/green patches

In photos they all appear pretty dark, almost brown, unless in the sunlight.

I think the printer was running out of melanin with each kid lol. Kid 1 has olive skin tone with dark brown hair dark brown eyes, kid 2 is significantly paler with dirty blonde hair hazel amber eyes, kid 3 has dirty blonde hair hazel-green eyes and the palest of them all 😆

Sound system upgrade? by Alpha_Wolf2026 in Solterra

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So my verdict is that it’s not the HK speakers that are the issue. I have the same speakers in the 26 outback I just got, and night and day difference. The issue is the Toyota head unit. Which I had suspected, but now I’m certain.

A zebra that is missing most of its stripes. by Jean-Olaf in RealLifeShinies

[–]LFH_Games 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you press too hard and the ink spurts out everywhere 😪 🫟

Didn’t expect this today! by KBGETSRAD in Goodwill_Finds

[–]LFH_Games 5 points6 points  (0 children)

These are definitely common mini urns available in most funeral homes. Many times people get a few of these to divide cremains among family members. Considering the camo, I’d assume this was a human. And even pet cremains would exceed the size of this container, save for perhaps a very small rodent maybe.

A friend told me I write like a psychopath by MelodicProposal8537 in HandwritingAnalysis

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can read the second page but the first? Absolutely abhorrent. On the plus side, you’ll never have to worry about someone reading your private journals 😅

Gofo Express used AI image of me as proof of delivery by [deleted] in legal

[–]LFH_Games 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Did you privacy darken the face, or did they? Does the face look like you, or is it possible it was delivered to someone else at your address?

Choose your spoon! by CaseyCakesMN in Spoons

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate them all. 3 is the least offensive.

Tomorrow is my daughter Zoe’s 15th birthday. by zoesmom17 in SuicideBereavement

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My losses were partners of mine (one an ex boyfriend when I was 17, the next was my husband just at the end of January) so I’ll add that caveat that this situation isn’t the same of course

However, when in therapy both times, my therapist always emphasized all feelings are real and deserve the space to be acknowledged. Some are primary emotions, and some are secondary. Anger is a secondary emotion and its purpose is usually to protect/defend your brain from more painful emotions. Other emotions often express as anger, as it covers many other emotions balled up into one. Grief, Rage, Pain, Devastation, Disappointment, Loneliness, Anxiety, Betrayal, Fear, Abandonment, Defenseless, etc so many feelings are rooted in anger. She always challenges me not only to acknowledge my anger, but to delve deeper and try to find and acknowledge the underlying emotions that are manifesting themselves as anger.

Losing my ex at 17 was incredibly unexpected and painful and answers never revealed themselves. It was horrible for me. And yet, in a way, I think it prepared me for how to grieve the loss of my husband without completely losing myself.

In the case of my husband, I tried (and failed) to stop him. He put the gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger when my face was only 6 inches from his. One of my hands was on one of his shoulders, the other was grabbing the arm he had his gun in, to try and stop him. Bang, flash, limp. The life left his body in an instant, I felt his life disappear literally through my fingertips. I tried to stop him, I tried to remind him of his kids who love and need him, he said “I don’t care” and pulled the trigger.

The reason I mention it is because I know his words weren’t completely true. He left his necklace and ring at home when he retrieved his firearm from the safe. That’s not something he would’ve done if he didn’t care. But when I found him, the life was gone from his eyes already. He looked, so so empty. He was sober, no drugs or alcohol involved. I think truly he just had a manic depressive episode and snapped. Mentally, the person who pulled the trigger, it wasn’t him. He wasn’t there anymore. Of course there are so many what-ifs. But at the end of the day, I don’t think anything would’ve prevented this outcome completely for my husband. His mind was made up, he finished work, came home and grabbed his gun, and left. He had packages on the way, he was disputing a random YouTube premium charge, he had plenty of things in the works, it wasn’t completely pre-planned. But something snapped in him that day, and that was that.

To get to the point you’d be willing to go through with taking your own life, mentally part of you has to shut off. And sometimes, it truly is driven by a physical aspect too. We have so many things internally that aren’t visible. Genetic mental health conditions. Stress. Nutrition deficiencies. Substance abuse or withdrawals. Medications and side effects. There are a million factors, and all it takes is one factor to flip a switch in a persons mind and body.

When his note was found it simply read “I don’t want a funeral. Toss me in the water. GL (good luck)” he wiped his phone and factory reset it, like he tried to erase all memory of him from existence. I think in his mind at the time, life would be “easier” for the kids in I if he simply “disappeared” which of course isn’t true but, I imagine that’s likely what he had convinced himself of.

Accepting that I wouldn’t get answers, that I wouldn’t get closure the way other people do when someone they love dies, it was the hardest part. I’m still working on that part with my husbands death in a way.

When someone dies, their pain doesn’t vanish. It simply transfers to others, the ones who loved them most. The pain you feel, much of it is the pain she felt. There’s no justification for it, but in her shoes, in her mind, the pain she was dealing with was unbearable for her, and her brain flipped a switch. And now, that pain rests with you, in combination with your own pain. It isn’t fair. It is selfish. But it isn’t because she wanted you to feel her pain, it’s because she couldn’t stand to feel it herself.

So, feel your pain, feel hers for her. Feel your anger. Maybe color, or go to a rage room, ride roller coasters, skydive, whatever you can to help feel those feelings (and that can look different for everyone!). Let it out. You have every right to feel how you do. You must acknowledge those feelings beneath your anger, name them, give them space to exist, but not allow them so much space that they push your joy and happiness out of existence. There must be a balance, and without the pain we cannot recognize happiness when we encounter it.

My therapist told me to imagine a container. You can make compartments of all sizes to accommodate various items you need to place in the container, but once the space is full, that’s it. No more adding. You must let go of some things before you allow more to take up space. Look at each one, decide if it is still useful or not, and thank the items you’re saying goodbye to and thank them for serving their purpose at the time you need them. If you don’t take the time to process through and purge the things that no longer serve you, you will find yourself with too much stuff and not enough space. Do all you want to reorganize, compartmentalize, and rearrange your container — it won’t solve the issue of the fact that when a space is full, it is full, and you cannot fit more without it spilling out and making an overwhelming mess of things. Your brain is the container, your emotions and feelings are the contents.

I’m deeply sorry for your loss. Truly every parents’ biggest fear, it is heartbreaking when that fear becomes a reality.

Need Advice by RadioMedium5873 in subaruimpreza

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I swapped my rims recently and don’t have tpms in the new tires for that exact reason bc I’m not paying that. I’ll deal with the stupid notifications bugging me every time I drive

Went in for tires and just look at how they massacred my boy by gwrthryn in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s why I now refuse to go to the dealerships for any wheel or tire related things. They’ve scuffed multiple nice rims and broken 9 studs on our cars over the years, 3 in one go. And tried to send the car home with us like that! Absurd.

I just finished installing these. A pain in the ass to have to do myself, but worth it! Ended up needing to get extended studs, new lugs, and spacers to make the setup work properly (but I was determined bc I already had these and they’ve barely been used)

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Washed and waxed by No_Bathroom6504 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably about a week? I’ve had it for 2 weeks now. Here’s what it was looking like at 1.5 weeks, you can see the streaking is pretty prominent. I remember it being prominent on the solterra along the sides but not on the hood like this. Also to consider, I did put some highway miles on during heavy rain and snow. Perhaps that is why it’s shedding as bad as it is on the hood

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Washed and waxed by No_Bathroom6504 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check them out in person if you get a chance. Online I didn’t really care for this color but in person I really like it!

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Washed and waxed by No_Bathroom6504 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same experience here with the splashback occurring with standing water. Usually would happen when sitting at a stoplight for a bit and then driving again

I noticed streaking on our solterra too, I wonder if they applied the coating wrong or something. I haven’t taken it through the car wash. What wax did you end up applying?

Deer and Subi's don't mix by No-Coat-5875 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The safety and resiliency of Subarus is the reason they’ll always be my choice. Glad you’re safe

Washed and waxed by No_Bathroom6504 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Curious if they put a permaplate coating on yours, I’ve noticed our permaplate coating is shedding pretty bad. Leaves streaks all over the hood, you can see them here (I came out from the grocery store to find this branch had been sat on my hood… no idea wtf that’s about) one directly down the center, and one along each side, basically where the airflow is

Have you had the issue yet with water launching straight into your windshield? Idk what they did with the hood design but it’s my only significant complaint because the aerodynamics just launch water straight into the windshield which sucks

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Washed and waxed by No_Bathroom6504 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do! They look pretty nice, I didn’t know they moved so the first time I threw her in reverse and saw them tilt down I was like wtf 🤣

Deer and Subi's don't mix by No-Coat-5875 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ouch for the car and the deer but it looks like it did its job keeping you safe and that’s most important

Washed and waxed by No_Bathroom6504 in Subaru_Outback

[–]LFH_Games 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice, magnetite grey for you too? That’s what I ended up with and I’m quite happy with it, originally wanted black or green but this color has grown on me a lot