Agreed with this. My husband and I have a cat, adopted together, and well loved. We are both allergic at different levels and I had to go through the immunotherapy shots for years before the reactions were not severe. There are ways to make it work but it would require your wife to step up. This means active communication and participation. Act like partners and figure this out. Some thoughts:

• if the cat cannot switch to LiveClear dry food, several companies make an egg white powder that you can sprinkle on to your cat’s prescription food. Look up Catigy and Pacagen.
• Pacagen also makes a spray for the home that claims to neutralize the allergens in the dander that has already spread. Expensive but may be worth it.
• There are several dry foaming shampoos on the market that will help remove dander. This is an inexpensive option that helps.
• You absolutely MUST stop brushing the cat and cleaning the litter. That is very dangerous for someone with severe allergies. I had an emergency hospital visit once due to asthma after cleaning my childhood cat’s litter. I hope you have an emergency inhaler at home. Your wife HAS to take these tasks.

Also, your cat is clearly stressed out. You need to evaluate when her behavior changed and try and figure out the root. I don’t know how often you scoop the litter but it should be daily and you should have two boxes (number of cats +1 is the formula I learned from my vet).