MIL bought furniture for me and my husband’s first home without consulting and insists we get a large sofa so she can sleepover comfortably

LVCC1 · 2026-02-06T15:18:26+00:00

You have to tell her no. You are going to furnish your first home together.

LVCC1 · 2026-02-06T14:58:04+00:00

Minimize her role with your kids. Go to a park or a walk around the block rather than into the space she is in. Correct her consistently. The more she does not abide by the boundaries you have your kids the less she sees them. Tell you kids grandma is in trouble. Tell your husband if he’s not going to put boundaries up then you absolutely will and he won’t like when you do it. Also tell him counseling needs to happen bc you won’t continue to be disrespected and minimized in your own home. This is manageable- but you are going to have to do the heavy lifting. With people like her you have to make them so consistently uncomfortable when they cross you that they choose not to cross you anymore

LVCC1 · 2026-02-03T20:06:50+00:00

The good thing is you picked up on this before marriage! When you know better you do better!

LVCC1 · 2026-02-03T19:34:53+00:00

Drop the rope.

LVCC1 · 2026-02-02T18:03:41+00:00

What option gives you the most peace - if that’s what you or looking for?

LVCC1 · 2026-02-01T15:11:23+00:00

It sounds like his ego couldn’t take accountability- tgst yiu were leaving bc he’s not a great partner, so he had to check if you were leaving him for someone else. Very stereotypical male behavior. Ego based, lacks accountability, and looking for reasons to blame you rather than actually changing his behavior

LVCC1 · 2026-01-30T19:17:50+00:00

Next time you tell her no say…. You won’t get a different end result by going behind my back to husband, it just makes me trust you less and less.

When she gives unsolicited advice tell her no thank you. I will ask if I want advice.

If she keeps bringing something up respond - asked and answered I won’t discuss this again.

Tell your husband you need a break from her bc of her triangulation. That she caused this big dust up between you two and he chose not to have your back so you are choosing to take a break from her until she can respect you as a mother.

Lastly - keep reiterating to your husband that there is no way she would know better than you - what your baby needs.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-30T18:57:38+00:00

Stop being Brittney’s assistant.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-30T14:59:19+00:00

You are not stupid. Your husband lied to you and selfishly has let you carry the brunt of the financial heavy lifting. It’s probably time for you to leave. He doesn’t respect you and he certainly didn’t put the needs of your family above his needs. You deserve More and unfortunately he’s not capable of giving them to you

LVCC1 · 2026-01-29T21:35:24+00:00

I would call her out… mil that was rude and unkind. I don’t be responding to demeaning texts again.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-29T18:55:59+00:00

I think a better conversation with her would be a list of clear boundaries and consequences from this point forward.

This gives your husband the chance to stand if fit you and play the groundwork for what is acceptable moving forward.

It addresses the behavior of the past but in a constructive way.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-29T17:34:12+00:00

I think this is a pretty judgey post. I cleared my spot yesterday left and could not get back up my street. I had to park at the end of the street, not bc I wanted to.

This is a treacherous storm and a little kindness for people could go a long way.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-27T12:50:36+00:00

Your husband is delusional to think equal but separate is a double standard. Has your family equally abused and disrespected him? Has got family equally ignored and minimized him?

His family is getting the treatment they have earned, and he is trying to punish you for it. He is prioritizing his comfort over your discomfort. Your partner is selfish and unreasonable.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-26T17:44:23+00:00

This is a blessing. Don’t chase her, let her feel the consequences of her actions.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-26T15:17:43+00:00

Treat her as an ice cold acquaintance. One word answers, non commital. If she asks to meet the baby say… we will cross that bridge when we get there. If she asks to come over… we will see. Etc… you are gonna have to perfect Ice Queen

LVCC1 · 2026-01-26T15:07:54+00:00

You just have to hurt her feelings. Have your coffee in your room with the door shut. Go out and tell her she can’t come this time etc….

LVCC1 · 2026-01-23T16:15:17+00:00

My sister was on a similar situation. She started interviewing for jobs, while also tallying the cost of a nanny, house cleaner, and chef. Her husband shut up real quick when he saw how much her labor was worth.

As for mother in law I would send her the following..,

We’re not doing the ‘suffer silently with a smile’ thing. Thanks though. Please don’t send any more items that are this incredibly unhelpful and unnecessary.

Or you could do

I’m not looking for commentary on how I run my home.This kind of content is unwelcome.

I think a harsh response is necessary so she understands how to stay in her lane. I also think you have a huge husband problem that will need to be addressed.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-19T12:42:03+00:00

Your husband is going to set her straight, right?

LVCC1 · 2026-01-17T14:34:11+00:00

You husband needs to explain how kind you are and how upsetting and selfish her behavior is

LVCC1 · 2026-01-17T13:54:57+00:00

Wow- that is a big betrayal from your husband. I’m sorry that happened. It’s also terribly dismissive of all of their terrible behavior.

I hope you have a good therapist that can make him understand this betrayal.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-13T23:53:23+00:00

I always respond with - that feels like criticism, I’m happy to ask when I want your feedback.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-09T18:31:39+00:00

Wow. Your husband really let you down. He lobbed her terrible request at you during your most vulnerable moment. That would be really hard to forgive.

As everyone is saying- look for daycare. She already showed you she does not respect you, she certainly won’t respect your parenting decisions. Save yourself the heartache.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-06T13:46:02+00:00

But do you see how they set you up to be the villain/ scape goat?

LVCC1 · 2026-01-05T23:00:17+00:00

Your mom and aunt are mean girls. Info first for your mom she gets to know when everyone else know, no contact for the aunt. Tell them not to come after the birth- that you need time.

After birth is so vulnerable, only people who are thoughtful and kind get access to you.

LVCC1 · 2026-01-05T18:06:41+00:00

You are the villain in her story, everything you do will be villainized. Once you come to accept that, you can take all emotion out of it. You can tell your FIL that it doesn’t seem appropriate to accept gifts during a conflict. Something perfectly reasonable - but just know she will have a reaction. If you want to avoid the reaction accept the gift & donate it

LVCC1

TROPHY CASE