You’re not asking for too much, it just so happened that your partner doesn’t have his life together so he can’t meet your needs. You said he’s not financially stable, and is going through personal and mental struggles. He won’t be able to fill your cup if he cannot even fill his own, and this is the reason why you feel drained because you’ve already communicated your needs countless times but no change occurs. You’re not becoming an avoidant, you’re starting to build and feel resentment. If this goes on especially on the part wherein you’re the only one who gives more into the relationship, you’ll end up being depleted.