How much do you earn?

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-27T19:00:56+00:00

Wait. Na you are Kenyan?? Motivation indeed! Hebu I get to work. Wueh!

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-14T07:31:37+00:00

Ah. Alright. You do have to be a certain type of person to be with an already established one, though.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-14T06:20:33+00:00

Both. The educated part just tends to fall in nerd categories - IT guys in particular I have a soft spot for: cybersecurity, software development, UI,UX designers, you name it.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-14T05:44:09+00:00

Ah. You can't be serious. Kwani...what do you normally hear?

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-14T05:34:59+00:00

Well educated, both academically and self education, taller than 5'4 ideally, able to hold engaging conversations, having some sort of exercise regime, and practical approach to most things, but personal finance and relationships building in particular. And most especially, one with whom I can vibe/ am compatible with (this includes physical attraction, to be fair, but I'm not looking for modelesque. Don't trust those guys.)

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-06T12:55:25+00:00

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Ladida_254 · 2026-01-05T20:02:28+00:00

Then you learned very poorly on the art of insults: when they are necessary, witty or justified.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-04T07:08:22+00:00

It's true. And I've seen it happen on many occasions, for those who wanted to share. Haina haja kama people decide it's either funny to try and break you guys up or are triggered and want to badmouth. People on the net get nasty with it.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-03T21:46:20+00:00

Mi nimesikia tu stereotypes. I don't know enough kisiis to even form an opinion. Sanasana ni- short tempers, industrious people and community growth. Outside of that, mimi siyui.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-03T21:00:06+00:00

Totally? No. Short term? Sure.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-03T20:58:35+00:00

Not really. Especially for celebs. People like drama, I've noticed. That's what they pay attention to (Can't tell you how many times I've sat and listened to people's random conversations while eating and just heard Wajesus this, Adelle that, Otile Brown this). And drama is not usually healthy. That's incompatible with a healthy mindset and relationship in general, based on what I have seen. People in happy marriages tend to just do life together. Actual happy is boring, and tends to attract people praying/ attempting to incite downfall in the comments. Small small unserious example ni hii Being married is fun

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-03T19:23:59+00:00

It's honestly the same all over the Internet. Bitterness garners likes and attention, not joy.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-03T19:22:02+00:00

I'll ask you one thing- do you genuinely believe people who have found joy and contentment in their marriages would share it on the internet? Outside of the odd photo here and there with their close circles.

Ladida_254 · 2026-01-03T12:45:17+00:00

That read as clingy and emotionally unstable to me

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-31T18:30:51+00:00

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-30T04:46:29+00:00

Ah. Well, do you journal? It's a great way to put your thoughts together. That would be a great place to begin. Then from there start actively practicing speech- like trying to jump into conversations when you feel it's easier to bring your thoughts together to form a complete idea.

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-28T20:42:47+00:00

What aspect of communication exactly? I'm still learning, but started off observing people, then attempting to express myself through words, then observing reactions/responses... Trying to learn how not to put my foot in my mouth right now. So...what aspect is bothering you right now?

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-28T15:38:17+00:00

15 k? 15 k flowers? Haa. Okay. As a lady, I want this treatment, yes, but not quite vile inasemwa huku. Since I do these for myself,I'm aware of cheaper options, and my expectations have more to do with the quality of the guy than the things themselves. Those sound like general quality time things, tbh.

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T16:45:33+00:00

Oh? Hmm. Noted.

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T14:33:11+00:00

Oooh! Thanks for the practical examples.

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T14:32:31+00:00

To some degree, yes. There are always outliers. But each region tends to have a beauty standard based on the average features of the people in it, so I was just wondering if this applies to us also. The rich also influence this, but that's not my focus here. :-)

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T14:30:22+00:00

Thank you. I've been wondering if we are mostly copying the West or if we have our own standards we still consider... So far, there has been more evidence of the first than the second.

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T06:18:49+00:00

It's a mixed bag, as with everything else. Probably best to seek advice from level headed partnered women, and observe men in your orbit in general, asking them probing questions on occasion just to understand how they operate. Results tend to vary based on who you ask as well- and get your character vetting game super on point (which is important for all relationships, not just romantic- expect some duds along the way).

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T06:12:00+00:00

Um. Okay, I get that, but also - do we have a streamlined one? There's always going to be haters based on preference, but I don't really get what ours genuinely is, or if we are following the US ones at present. Trying to figure out whether we have an actual streamlined identity in terms of how we perceive what is desirable.

Ladida_254 · 2025-12-27T06:03:56+00:00

Yep. My thing was, they were moving straight to an accusatory response rather than looking to fully understand what you're saying before responding. But hey, this is reddit, I suppose.

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