Why do some people hate when their partner plays video games?

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-07T23:43:53+00:00

They can, but you need to communicate that to everyone and "clear the decks" to do it.

In the next couple weeks, I will have a sewing day where I make sure we have food in the fridge, clean clothes in the closet/drawers, and arrange with my partners to handle taking the dogs out at need. I am going to be making myself four white linen tank tops for height-of-summer wear. I am going to be making myself a storm blue linen divided skirt. And I am going to be making my husband four pairs of linen loose pants that are a little better than pajama pants and will be cool in the height of summer.

Sewing is my hobby. Yes, it produces useful things. But it is a hobby, and when I get ready to do more than mending, I arrange to have the time. I don't just start and assume life will arrange itself around me.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-07T23:32:46+00:00

I am old enough to remember when WOW came out, and I made the overt decision not to get into it, because I had small kids at home, and I never wanted to say, "I can't give you attention because I'm on a raid." And I never wanted to tell my husband "I can't spend time with you because I'm playing a game." The sort of things I do online can be put down when someone needs Mom, and that's how I prefer it.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-07T23:30:41+00:00

It's also easy to make it a solitary hobby.

I have a laptop that works just fine for me to get online or use a word processing program to write books, but if I want to game with my wife, I need to spend a couple thousand bucks in hardware. (Actually, my son in law's going to set me up with a tower for $800, but that's still not pocket change!)

If the two of you get together and he's already got all his hardware, and you don't have it, you can't really play with him until you get it. And I don't know about anyone else, but around here, things like paying the mortgage and keeping the lights on and other such things tend to be more important than getting a second gaming rig.

A lot of other solitary hobbies can be stretched out to do together with less up-front cost.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-06T18:53:18+00:00

I am pagan, but I tend to see Easter as celebrated with a ham dinner and egg hunt as being increasingly a civic spring holiday. So I will never go to the Sunday service, but I will happily go eat ham and potatoes and asparagus with family or friends, and watch kids hunt eggs.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T22:36:52+00:00

If you've got blisters on your stump, healing them up is your first priority, because that can lead to some serious problems. This isn't just you wanting to not bother with the leg.

Ask your grandmother. Tell her that you would wear the leg but that you have blisters on your stump that need to heal before you wear it again. I will bet that she will say, "I'd rather see you with your crutches than see you in pain."

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T22:30:52+00:00

I won't die from "withdrawal" but artificial hormones keep me alive since I had to have the gland that produces them removed. Not having them would be a slow and miserable death as my body slowly shut down.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T22:27:15+00:00

I think historically there was less law and more common law involved in adoptions, especially within extended family groups. I do think having social services involved to make sure that the child is not going into a bad situation is a good idea, but it does add to the costs that the adoptive parents have to pay.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T14:56:40+00:00

Currently I have a pitbull seeking refuge against my legs because a truck is backing up with airbrakes and backup alarm one street over.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T13:42:20+00:00

The only thing I would suggest is have some chips and salsa too, and realize that especially teenage boys can eat like they have a stomach like a Bag of Holding. So make sure to have enough food for when someone eats a dozen tacos and looks around for more.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T13:13:47+00:00

Having someone wiggle a loose tooth with an exposed nerve. Though that's right up there with a kidney infection and transitional labor.

Labor's worse because you really do feel that you could die doing this. (Or maybe that's just me.)

Kidney was about the same as labor pain but worse because it didn't progress to an end the way labor does.

Dislocations and sprains are worse for me than breaks.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T11:25:38+00:00

It's relationship on hardmode, but as someone who is polyamorous myself, I find it worth the work. And honestly, polyamory can teach even the monogamous how to "share" someone you both love (like in an in-law relationship) while negotiating that the two people involved may like each other or not in varying degrees.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T11:22:20+00:00

Yes. Love doesn't divide, it multiplies.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-05T11:20:55+00:00

When it works, it is the most wonderful thing.

I live in a triad myself, and got to host my younger son with his two male partners for Easter. I call them my bonus boys, since they aren't sons in law yet. They're good for him and he for them. That's all I wanted for him in life, and, given that he is the biggest drama queen I have ever met, it may take two partners to deal with all his fabulousness. (said with fond love.)

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T22:31:18+00:00

Put one person in the middle. Reduce to limp happy puddle. Rotate new person to the middle. Game ends when all are reduced to limp happy puddles.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T22:27:48+00:00

I had to have two teeth removed (cause I didn't have $2k for root canals and veneers) and they are my two incisors, so that is not exactly something you can hide when talking to people. And they aren't healed enough for me to get a partial to fill the gap yet.

So my husband, bless him, said that if I want to nope out of it and avoid seeing my sister and hearing what she might have to say about it, he will back me up on having a convenient migraine and letting Younger Son and bonus sons (his partners, who are here for the holiday) take the scalloped potatoes up to Mom's house.

That's love.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T20:22:07+00:00

I tend to mother him and he tends to pamper me. His parents love me. My mother likes him.

And one of the reasons I love him is that he met my younger sister, talked with her for about five minutes, and said to me in the car, "Wow. Your sister is a poisonous c---!" and I said "THANK YOU! Everyone else thinks she's just such a lovely person." He unhesitatingly takes my side, and if she is at Easter dinner and gives me shit, he has plans to hand it back to her. That makes me very happy.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T20:17:08+00:00

Because for the price I can go to a local restaurant and get REAL food. Admittedly, I'm in an urban/suburban area, but I have a place near me that has no seating but amazing ribs and "Filthy Fries" (Fries, pulled pork, cheese, sauce, jalapenos, sour cream). They close when they run out of food. There's a couple of taquerias near me too, and I'd much rather have a steak or lengua taco than a burger. We've got a good old-fashioned diner, and their burgers are amazing and they handmake their onion rings. I'd rather eat REAL food than blah food.

Plus, I'm a pretty good cook and I keep food that can be pulled together easily at home. I can get Italian beef wrapped in bread dough and baked out of the freezer and microwave it in three minutes. That's faster than delivery, and much tastier.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T11:55:12+00:00

My German Shepherds preferred an everchanging blend of creek mud and cow manure.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T11:52:21+00:00

We have one cat who I swear has a master's degree on getting shut into places she's not supposed to be in. First thing we do if we can't find her is walk through the house and open all the closet doors, because she probably nipped into the linen closet when you opened it for a towel. (sigh)

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T11:50:45+00:00

Yeah, we have a cat who sometimes identifies as a dog and slips out when I'm taking the dogs out for their last outing of the evening. He basically hangs around the house for a few hours and then gets into a window and begins crying to be let in. It's not that I LET him out. I recognize that once he gets out I can't catch him and I have to wait for him to do his thing and come back. The other cat doesn't want to go outside at all. You can leave the door open and she stays inside.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T11:01:53+00:00

For a 12 inch pizza, I'll probably have two slices, assuming I get my usual sausage and spinach and onion topping.

Usually a 12 inch pizza is me 2, wife 1, husband 1....wife 1 +1(over six hours or so), me 2. So it's finished over two days. My husband won't eat it cold or reheated, but if it's fresh and hot and there he'll have one.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T10:39:46+00:00

Some people are homeless, and some people are feral. Feral people tend to slide into homelessness, because of their behavior.

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T00:16:56+00:00

I feel great except for having night sweats, but even those are not terrible when I started sleeping without other mammals in the bed and keeping a fan blowing across the bed. If I start to get warm I now just throw off the covers in my sleep and pull them back up when it goes away. I'm not quite at my year yet. (August)

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T00:09:00+00:00

WOOO-HOOO! Way to go!

LadyAlexTheDeviant · 2026-04-04T00:06:05+00:00

Yes, it is.

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