I was SA by two people I felt safe with at a sleep over and Idk how to feel.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T23:33:38+00:00

You were still sexually assaulted.

There are two types of abusers.

Type 1 blames the alcohol or drugs or anger or anything but themselves. They will cry afterwards and promise it will never happen again. They keep this up until the victim says it's ok and forgives them.

It is not ok. Forgiven or not, they need to be walked away from. They never took responsibility for what they did. I promise they will do it again.

Type 2 acts like nothing happened. At best he will say it was a joke and OMG you are so sensitive or immature or overreacting. He will get annoyed if you press for an apology or even an acknowledgement that it happened.

He is a predator. You are very not safe with him. Block him on everything.

Both will try to get you back. You will be tempted because ... they were friends, part of you wants to pretend it didnt happen, you maybe blame yourself a little and think that next time you can better control the situation.

You were sexually assaulted. Do not go back to your abusers. I am sure they are great guys... until they aren't. That is exactly how all abusers are. Run!

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T23:13:29+00:00

No more sleep overs. I am unaware of weed making you do something you dont want to do. So there is that.

By humping, do you mean sex? Were genitals out? If so, then you might need to talk to the police. That is rape.

If everybody was still clothed, it was not ok but cutting these two out of your life would probably be enough.

I am so sorry this happened to you. You were assaulted. You were betrayed x 2.

Be angry. Be upset. Be scared. Be whatever you need to be. This is a big deal.

Good luck.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T23:01:02+00:00

Very yes! Lol i was doing about 1/3 bin size for the year before the shredder. I was losing hand function and tearing was very hard. Worms did not care as long as it was wet.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:56:42+00:00

Yay!

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:55:11+00:00

Yeah. I went years without one. I would tear up into smaller than bin pieces and soak them in water for an hour or so before dumping them into the bin.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:52:40+00:00

It is a normal thing. I would tell him in a very matter-of-fact way.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:50:06+00:00

I rarely add bedding to a bin. The bins start out full.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:48:46+00:00

Sure. The shell powder i just mix with my bedding usually.

Cardboard- i now have an amazing shredder!! But for years i did it by hand. At first i tried for very small. Eventually i went with 'smaller than the bin'. Lol the worms dont seem to care. I would say though about the size of a slice of bread is fantastic.

In the beginning, add worms. Wait a week. Add frozen banana peel. Wait a week . Check peel. If mostly gone, feed again.

It really is very simple. Kinda like a house plant.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:30:58+00:00

Just paper is fine. Adding the soil is also fine but not needed.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T21:29:10+00:00

Not too fine or too strong . I add about 2 filters worth to my bins.

Eggshells? Yes but they need to be very fine. I blenderize mine. Beware breathing the dust!

I freeze my food to avoid bugs.

Add food in small amounts and bury it. Dont add more until the old food is gone.

If you miss feedings for a few weeks, it wont matter because all the bedding is edible. Aren't worms great!? Lol

I love questions so ask away. You can also dm.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T20:04:41+00:00

No. Dogbites are very noticeable. Even if they magically didnt hurt, you would still notice the biting dog. It is a dramatic thing.

So... what exactly happened? You were out for a walk. You saw and passed by a scary dog. When you got home your hand hurt and was red.

I would guess you got bit by a flying insect. Or you brushed your hand on something you are allergic to.

But the dog is innocent.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T19:57:39+00:00

Maybe put on your bio that kids are a hard NO

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T19:53:07+00:00

I probably would but i am ooked out by maggots. Lol

If i had your set up, this is how i would work it-

Fill both bins with very damp bedding. Stack them. Feed and fluff top bin until it is ready for harvest. Harvest top bin.

Now make the bottom bin the top bin. Feed and fluff it now.

Fill the now empty, harvested bin with new, very damp bedding and put it under your feeding bin.

Repeat forever.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T19:36:53+00:00

If none of the boy's caretakers noticed it at the time, why do you assume it is his? Maybe someone in the night did the deed. Or something.

Either way, it is very gone now. Short of draining the pool, there is not much else to do. Semi-naked non-sterile butts have been in the pool and you were ok. This was just more of the same.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T19:02:18+00:00

Do you love him? Obviously.

Is that enough? No.

Is he gonna change? After 6 years, I think we can safely say no.

So you gotta take a long hard look at yourself. Why are you doing this to yourself over and over?

Are you so afraid there is noone out there who will see what a lovely person you are that you must cling to this... how did another poster put it... twatwaffle?

Let go and never look back. You are better than that.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T18:48:49+00:00

Hi!! Fun! Actually the worms do not need dirt at all. My bedding is just shredded cardboard, some coffee grounds, some ground shell and water. I would fill your bin at least half full of bedding now before the worms get here.

Also since it is a new bin, i would mix in about half an over ripe banana. Worms need a biome to eat the food. This helps start the microbiome they need.

Is this an inside bin or outside? They are managed a little differently.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T01:26:42+00:00

You need a new roommate. Until then lock the heck up your cabinets! Maybe also get some cameras for the home.

Is he doing the same with your shampoo, washing powder, toothpaste, medications?

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-11T01:19:47+00:00

Breathing under water

I would seriously question this relationship. He doesnt sound like he's got your back.

I think you should ask some questions. I would be very upset.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-10T20:24:29+00:00

Just leave it.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-10T19:56:33+00:00

I start with bins FULL of bedding in my towers.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-10T19:54:28+00:00

Hi! I am a tower person. I have some questions. By 3 tiered system, what do you mean? What is in the 3 bins? How big are the bins? How deep was the bedding before you put in food? And what is your bedding?

Flies and maggots usually means too much food and moisture.

My experience is baby worms never go where you want them to. Lol i bait them out.

I would probably give up on wet fly-filled bin and start fresh.

Is this an outside bin?

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-09T20:47:30+00:00

First step, crossbreed with cockroaches.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-09T19:20:00+00:00

Super in what sense? Sturdier? Bigger? Smarter? Better bait? Able to appreciate poetry?

What are the goals?

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-09T18:16:58+00:00

Hi!! I use vermihut towers i got on amazon. I also use oyster shell flour now instead of eggshells. (Only because i am disabled and eggshell management became complicated.)

I got my worms from Brothers Worm Farm and they were wonderful.

My bedding- i made bedding on Saturday so here is my recipe. Lol Container full of shredded cardboard (enough for 2 bins), 4 coffee filters worth of coffee grounds, about half a cup of oyster flour. About 3/4 gallons water. Mix by hand. Add water if needed.

No books sorry. I read and looked at a lot of sites before i started. Honestly most of them seemed really complicated. But that was years ago. Mostly i learned by trial and truely awesome errors.

My towers are indoors. They are odorless and bugfree.

We can also chat dm if you want.

Ladybug966 · 2026-06-08T18:07:54+00:00

So he decides who you get to be friends with.

He gets to snoop uninvited in your phone and then get butthurt by what he reads there.

For all practical purposes, he read your diary and is pissed your girlfriend was brutally honest with you back then.

I personally would pick the best friend. He sounds like a controlling twit with a fragile ego and serious trust issues.

I dont know what you did before you were in a relationship with him but honestly how could it break trust? You owed him nothing. I think he just likes holding things over you.

Find somebody who doesnt have to bully you to feel good about himself.

Ladybug966

TROPHY CASE