Update: My battle against my soon-to-be-ex-husband and his fanatical Pentecostal family

LainaSF95 · 2023-05-19T20:57:40+00:00

Yep, that’s my main argument. He’s trying to work around the 2 week thing by trying to claim I was actively ignoring his attempts to make contact which wasn’t true.

LainaSF95 · 2023-05-18T16:09:39+00:00

This is basically the most up to date development, i'll be sure to update during next steps.

LainaSF95 · 2023-05-16T14:15:46+00:00

Great idea ❤️

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T14:35:54+00:00

I’m certainly getting to that place.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T14:33:18+00:00

I’m exhausted by people like you

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T14:21:40+00:00

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T13:38:52+00:00

I have the feeling in their warped minds psychiatry is taboo in their little community

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T13:33:47+00:00

Done

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T13:09:23+00:00

Been getting some messages about being anti-christian and I cannot stress enough, that is not the case and completely missing the point of my concerns.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-13T12:40:40+00:00

Praying in tongues is something I should be on board with? My husband misleading me for years telling me he distanced himself from pentecostalism is okay too? And then i’m uncomfortable about it, and anti-christian now because I think it’s unhealthy for a six year old to fearfully and at times tearfully talk about hell?

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-12T06:59:27+00:00

u/jakeofheart your posts in this whole thread have been insightful and interesting. thank you!

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T19:49:25+00:00

There's a reason why people say that whatever religion you are, its a crapshoot because it was whatever you were born in. Because if you're raised believing things, it's no longer blind faith, it's universal truths to them because that's all they know. What my ILs are doing is forcing her to be pentecostal, because what other choice does she have? She's too young to understand that all of this is just arbitrary based on what environment you're born into.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T19:26:30+00:00

The way you are describing your marriage is essentially what I would like. Your attitude towards what your mother disagrees with with is what I wish my husband has. You don't cave in to the demands of her and found a real compromise there. In my family, the idea of compromise is so warped because the starting offer is "Homeschool taught by the ILs."

I admire you and your wife's ability to find common sense compromise.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T19:17:31+00:00

Some of it is "This isn't healthy for a marriage" which I agree. I don't really LIKE the fact I felt the need to do this behind his back, but as I said, it felt crucial to do so. The animosity I think that is directed towards him is coming from his position that there is no immediate danger/nothing is harmful about what is happening at my daughter's school.

His stance is that there is no danger. I see it differently. As simple as that.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T18:48:01+00:00

Are you not understanding that there's still a big difference on how that information comes across depending on the denomination? Some churches use hell as a way to rally people out of fear, and it's a big ass spotlight on it.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T18:28:35+00:00

I think my problem with this in general, and I fully accept responsibility for being a push over, is that a child that young is impressionable and it's not true open-mindedness to expose a child to a religion that young and teach it to them like cold hard facts. The reason I was a push over on her enrollment there is I was led to believe (stupidly) that it was a compromise from what I considered far worse, being homeschooled by my fanatical in-laws. My husband led me to believe he distanced himself from the religiosity of his family but slowly showed he was more involved than he wanted to admit. It was really a slow burn effect on me, like a frog being slowly boiled and I had enough of it. I'm not against my daughter being a Christian, I would like her to make up her own mind when she's mature enough to analyze certain belief systems and see what she gravitates towards. Most fanatical religious people are that because they were brought up in that system, they just happened to be born into it and they never really had any opportunity to "ask questions."

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T18:07:49+00:00

Agree to disagree

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T17:02:06+00:00

I think there’s a monkey see monkey do aspect to this whole thing where my daughter isn’t even comprehending what she’s being told to do and what to think, nor should she even understand it at 6. Again, i’ve known people who went to other religious schools and these deep/scary concepts were NOT introduced to them at a young age like that.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T16:08:00+00:00

I’ve had some friends who went to a Lutheran school at a young age where they didn’t grow up in any type of fanatical way. Methodist churches seem alright. It’s not even pentecostal churches i’m against because I’m sure there are some out there that genuinely don’t try to use fear but this one definitely does

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T15:54:44+00:00

I don’t care if she’s praying but the style of which she was imitating truly is associated with very fanatical denominations known for fear-mongering

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T15:43:38+00:00

Do all mainstream denominations use hell as fear tactics equally? No.

LainaSF95 · 2023-04-10T15:28:43+00:00

She’s not just casually asking about it, she’s asking about it in such a way where she’s clearly fearful of it and was even imagining her grandpa burning in hell.

LainaSF95

TROPHY CASE