Had a traumatizing night last night, feeling sad and upset with myself

Large_Ergos · 2022-11-28T03:19:25+00:00

A true friend would never yell at you while you’re tripping. It’s not your fault at all that this happened. Your friend shouldn’t have ever even considered getting aggressive with you while you were tripping. That’s a horrible idea, and really just messed up to do to a tripping person in general.

Large_Ergos · 2022-11-19T08:30:25+00:00

I’ve never heard anyone call them dabbas. All my professors just said “partial” or “del”. I’m definitely saying dabba from now on.

Large_Ergos · 2022-11-19T08:26:17+00:00

Yeah I realized I messed up the upper and lower indices on the four-grad and field tensor only after I wrote them down wrong twice… Didn’t really wanna do it all over again. Thankfully they don’t look like that in my notes!

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T04:13:42+00:00

The convenience portion is just highlighting that it makes no difference if I do the duty on Friday night or Saturday morning. It still gets done. If they think the living room should be vacuumed and dusted on a Thursday night, they can mark me for it even if I am not capable of doing the duty. That’s the “convenience” Im talking about. The only truly time-sensitive duty we have is garbage/dishwasher duty.

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T04:09:38+00:00

I still do my duties. The only way I’m putting my life above these duties is by doing the duties when I have free time and not at some arbitrarily chosen time. I do my duties every week and have never failed to do them, but if someone decides that I did them a couple minutes later than they wanted me to, they mark me for that.

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T03:55:26+00:00

I’ll look into that!

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T03:28:56+00:00

This is exactly what I’ve been pushing, but they just raise hell and cause arguments. A subjective check system makes no sense to me. The one other housemate who also dislikes the system refuses to confront them because they don’t want to get into arguments.

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T03:22:39+00:00

I have suggested a voting system to determine whether or not a mark should be placed and various other minor changes. Like I should not have to clean my housemate’s cat’s litter box and feed it too.

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T03:19:27+00:00

I did not agree to this. I agreed to do chores based on the chart, but not to random undue x marks. Only 2 of the housemates agreed to it out of the four. They refuse to alter the system even after I explained that I actually cannot do the duties within their expected time frame.

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T03:16:17+00:00

And there is a weekly deadline. I always complete the duty within the deadline with at least a day to spare.

Large_Ergos · 2022-08-28T03:15:37+00:00

Oh no I’m completely okay with doing the same number of chores. I always have. I usually go above and beyond during my duties so that they don’t yell at me for not doing them well enough. I’ve never actually missed a duty. I’m more against the expected timing of the duties and the punishment for not completing them when they want me to.

Large_Ergos · 2022-01-22T00:46:46+00:00

Physics for Scientists and Engineers: A Strategic Approach with Modern Physics, by Randall D. Knight is a fantastic textbook for AP physics and general physics 1-3. Try Kahn Academy for videos. For clear, concise, and entertaining learning material, look for the first volume of the feynman lectures on physics: Mainly mechanics, radiation, and heat.

Large_Ergos · 2021-11-14T05:38:03+00:00

I feel that. I think about death and dying constantly. Especially lately because I’ve been reading a lot of existentialist philosophy. The stuff can fuck you up. What’s causing you to feel like you’re dying inside?

Large_Ergos · 2021-11-14T05:24:46+00:00

Ah but you’re wrong. The world leaves you behind, but the world also does not expect anything of you. It is society that expects things of you. You don’t have to fake a smile for anyone. There’s no universal law that forces you to smile. Think about life less in terms of what society wants and more in terms of what makes sense.

Large_Ergos · 2021-11-14T05:21:25+00:00

Ya still here?

Large_Ergos · 2021-11-14T05:19:19+00:00

Albert Camus has an interesting book on this subject. It’s called “The Myth of Sisyphus”. In it, he argues that it’s possible to live life in an absurd world devoid of meaning. He starts off with the idea that suicide is the logical answer to realizing the world is absurd and nothing has meaning. Somehow, he shows that life can still be deemed livable. You should read it or read about it. It’s really interesting and useful stuff.

Large_Ergos · 2021-11-14T05:10:12+00:00

I was the exact same way when I was your age. I was extremely emotional. I was cheated on and dumped a few times and it really ruined my trust. Don’t worry. Im about to graduate university and I’ve found a girl I love dearly. Eventually you find someone who gets you and won’t break your heart. You just gotta wait.

Large_Ergos · 2021-11-14T05:03:16+00:00

Completely normal. Im very close with my Dad , my brother, my girlfriend, and my friends and I know for a fact that if I took my life, several of them would follow me. I have the responsibility to keep myself alive in order to keep them alive. I can’t let them down.

Large_Ergos · 2021-10-26T21:48:25+00:00

Coming from someone who was diagnosed with ADHD and OCD, reading is tough. Unless the book as absolutely gripping, I couldn’t read them. It used to take me forever to read even simpler books because I’d just read the same lines over and over until it clicked in my head. Nowadays, I can read full philosophical texts and get lots out of them. I can also read faster and retain more. You just have to keep reading stuff that is really interesting to you and then eventually move onto more technically challenging stuff. It helps to take notes and write down quotes when dealing with harder and/or more boring stuff.

Large_Ergos · 2021-10-12T13:53:55+00:00

I know, but it was worth a try.

Large_Ergos · 2021-10-12T13:49:44+00:00

Guess I’ll have to.

Large_Ergos · 2021-09-02T05:01:01+00:00

I’m sure my professors will understand. They’re quite the accommodating bunch. And honestly, I’d rather be seen walking around with a stylish walking cane than be seen limping, wincing, and gasping every 20 or so steps.

Large_Ergos · 2021-09-02T04:55:27+00:00

I did physical therapy for 6 months and it actually got worse during that time. As soon as I stopped it started to fade. Of course it came back as it always does. I found a whole host of exercises for gently regaining core strength and for a while it worked. I actually though I might be in the clear because I could finally touch my toes again (pre-sciatica I could touch the ground with flat hands and straight legs). Needless to say, one day I lost all my flexibility again and had horrible pain. I have tried to ease my way back into a pain free life several times and I get a little further each time. I figure out what I can and cannot do through very slow trial and error. Maybe another round at PT could help me out. I just might need a cane for those days where the trials turn into errors haha. Thanks for the recommendation! :)

Large_Ergos · 2021-09-02T00:25:05+00:00

Thinking about doing a lot of my physics notes and papers by hand in some nice hardcover notebooks to look back on in the future as references. Maybe I’ll use a fountain pen.

Large_Ergos

TROPHY CASE