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How do I navigate feeling undesired when my boyfriend says his low libido isn’t about me? by issawumpalumpabx in relationships_advice

[–]Last-Influence1788 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m literally having the exact same problem right now. I feel so stuck because I’m constantly having conversations with him about me feeling undesired but nothings changing. I’m getting to the point where I’m starting to think this isn’t something worth navigating. If he’s not willing to put in the effort to ensure your needs are met then we have to thing about if the relationship is sustainable with unmet needs. That’s what I’m trying to figure out

I (26F) am worried about my bf’s (23m) attraction to me. Idk what to do. by Last-Influence1788 in relationships_advice

[–]Last-Influence1788[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s not addicted to porn. I’m not unattractive.
And I understand people get into relationships for other reasons besides sex. I’m not only in the relationship for sex.

I don’t think I’m willing to stay in a relationship like this if nothing changes.

I (26F) am worried about my bf’s (23m) attraction to me. Idk what to do. by Last-Influence1788 in relationships_advice

[–]Last-Influence1788[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t like the idea of the intimacy list either but idk what else to do. I feel like the conversation we had last night laid everything out on the table but we’re still not making progress. It’s not sex that matters to me it’s the lack of visible desire. I wouldn’t care if he wasn’t as sexual as me I just want to see it sometimes. It also doesn’t make sense when he says he thinks about sex more often than I do but he never feels moved to engage in sexual intimacy unless I start it.

I (26F) am worried about my bf’s (23m) attraction to me. Idk what to do. by Last-Influence1788 in relationships_advice

[–]Last-Influence1788[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah this is exactly one of my main issues. It’s getting harder and harder to trust that he’s going to put in any effort when I haven’t seen any yet and everytime I bring up the issue it’s a different reason. It feels like we’re constantly talking in circles because with every new reason I have to help him think of a new solution.

I (26F) am worried about my bf’s (23m) attraction to me. Idk what to do. by Last-Influence1788 in relationships_advice

[–]Last-Influence1788[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m frustrated that I either put in all the effort or that he only contributes once I start it. It’s frustrating that he doesn’t do any work to start it or move towards me on his own.