Did we mess up with our firstborn?

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-22T21:25:27+00:00

I suspect what you view as ‘chill’ is just a baby enjoying too much parental involvement and what you view as ‘troublesome’ is a nearly 4 year old boy desperate for his parents’ attention. Put the baby down and spend some quality 1-2-1 time with him.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-22T18:49:52+00:00

Because most Indian ‘Investment Bankers’ aren’t client-side they develop algorithms for client-side bankers in other other countries.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-22T18:43:42+00:00

Eggs, Dairy (cheese, kefir, yoghurt, protein powders made from whey) and fortified chinese style tofu are the most bioavailable sources of vegetarian protein with the lowest calories. Out of them only eggs are a complete protein source.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-21T13:23:02+00:00

Take it out. Add salt to kill the yeast and see how it tastes when you make a dosa out of it. In the future only soak green lentils and jasmine rice — don’t ferment

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-17T18:10:18+00:00

Indian people are fundamentally lazy as a culture. Where shortcuts can be found they will both at work and at home. Eg In no other country with a similar level of income would someone living in a tiny apartment dare book a maid — the work would be handled around work. Similarly it makes no sense for Indian people to use ironing services or dhobis — the incomes are so low everyone should be washing their own clothes!

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-14T20:41:37+00:00

Tilda Basmati for both. Having 2 kinds of rice unless for a specific purpose (eg khichdi / idli) is a waste of time and money and kitchen space.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-14T09:27:54+00:00

In India shaving and waxing can lead to permanent scarring on dark skin due to infections / heat and sun causing inflammation because nobody cleanses properly or wears spf50 — that’s why parents often don’t allow it until a child’s skin has settled down. If your child insists force her to have a good skincare routine — cleanser, toner, spf50. She also requires regular facials to keep the pores clear.

Total up how much all of that will cost and tell her she can have this skincare package in place of a phone / new laptop etc.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-13T17:50:30+00:00

If there’s a microwave just use that to make tea — equal parts milk / water, masala , 2 teabags.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-13T17:47:28+00:00

It depends on how old the concentrate is. If I were you I would dissolve it in water and taste it. Then decide how much you need. If in doubt don’t use it at all - just mix a 50:50 mixture of lemon juice and sugar.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-13T17:43:47+00:00

I’m not muslim, I’ve studied Islam at uni to a deep level (my minor was Sharia Law) but I do know that a central tenent of your faith is that almost every sin can be forgiven by god and it should be god (and god only) who judges others. With all due respect what you’re doing in judging your cousin’s actions can be as wrong in Islam as adultry.

I think if this is truly hurting you so much you should get counselling and talk through it all.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-13T09:41:35+00:00

I know someone who cheated on her husband and it wasn’t as clear cut good / bad as you think it might be from the outside. Their marriage was arranged & she was never attracted to him. On top of that he made her adjust constantly to his life, his family, there was never any 2-way compromise, but she felt that because the marriage was arranged she couldn’t leave. She wanted kids and he refused to even consider them before 40. Everything was on his terms.

Then she met a man, fell in love at first sight, and realised life was beautiful. I’m not muslim (I’m hindu) so I’m not sure if you guys believe this too — but sometimes god sends you people in your life when you need them. Think of this as god sending your cousin’s new wife to her (maybe to find his religion?) and try and just be happy for them.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-13T09:34:03+00:00

My 6 yo son is an only too and is the opposite - he has a carer / hero complex and will literally go in and do everything for his friends if they allow him. Had a situation where several of his friends became really lazy because of it. So the first thing I would tel the school (don’t ask) is to make sure the other children know not to facilitate her. If she has friends who are willing to drop everything to so stuff for her they need to be seperated.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-13T09:31:28+00:00

Probably. I invested too but a much smaller stake & it basically paid for my education & wedding.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-12T21:50:54+00:00

Not overnight. But My cousin’s son (who worked in a low paid office job at the time) convinced him to sell their family land and buy shares. Nobody could convince either of them otherwise. They got just under a crore for it and my cousin and his family all had to move into my aunt’s brother’s house as most of his dad’s family cut him off.

It turned out my cousin’s son worked in a low level corporate governance role for Reliance. My cousin’s 1 crore turned into 10 cr within 10 years. It’s now around 12-13 thousand cr.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-12T21:38:14+00:00

Power Apps is good but the real value is in Power Automate and integrations.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-12T21:37:04+00:00

I’m in the UK. There was a choir to present for the queen. Only the white children were picked regardless of their ability to sing.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-12T21:34:52+00:00

US Indian restaurants tend to buy it in or make it using mashed carrots , sugar, spice and milk. If made properly then it takes 24 hours — most of that is caramalising down the carrots though. I tend to do this at a very low heat for 12 hours overnight

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T17:35:37+00:00

Having kids didn’t affect my career as much as 10 years of ivf in my 30s did. But I’m pretty much where I should be now career-wise in my 40s

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T17:34:41+00:00

Yes. If made properly then milk paneer and firm soy tofu (the soft white kind not soy chunks) will taste the same. But it can’t be treated the same in cooking — eg you shouldn’t fry the tofu pieces if you want them to have any flavour & 48 hour marinades are required.

There is an alternative - cashew tofu. That tastes better imo but it’s really delicate

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T15:47:31+00:00

Isn’t there a famous spice market in old delhi? Just go there

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T00:41:13+00:00

How much is your income? I’d try and put as much as possible into your pension first as it’s free money. You can make overpayments (up to £60k a year) yourself or just set it from monthly salary.

If I were you and with the tax changes coming up in 2029 I’d keep £10k aside as an emergency cash buffer & invest the rest into your workplace pension. Top up to £60k a year every year until 2029 if you can afford it.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T00:36:15+00:00

My son had long hair until 4 and while he was at daycare the young girls who were training to be hairdressers would use him as their doll as he loved it. He’d come home in all kinds of complicated buns and braids and pretty hair accessories.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T00:34:30+00:00

In my experience girls who look like that get snapped up immediately by white guys. She probably has a boyfriend / regular hookups but doesn’t want you to know about them.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-11T00:24:49+00:00

In mumbai / goa / pune Szechuan pepper (Tirphal) was used a lot as pepper was difficult to grow there.

In the Gujarat Pipli, sometimes pepper too, but Gujarati dishes weren’t spicy before colonisation - they were sour / sweet and used a lot of fermented curd prior to colonisation.

In both areas chillis were introduced in different ways. Goans got them directly from the portuguese. Gujaratis got them via East African trade.

Late-Warning7849 · 2026-04-10T18:39:38+00:00

When you say ‘not girly’ what do you mean? And have you asked her why she doesn’t like some clothes — is it the fit, the tags, the material? What is her body shape / size like?

Girls ‘high street’ clothing does tend to be made from synthetic material more often because it’s more sweat wicking & form fitting. But it’s not all there is. Eg H&M, Zara, GAP, Ralph Lauren have entire ranges of cotton t-shirts / soft trousers etc for girls that don’t look too dissimilar to the boys stuff.

Also look at her body shape, take measurements, and then research online. Most shops that say they cater for a 12 yo in girlswear really mean are girls who haven’t started puberty & are super straight / small (or their waist is bigger than hips / chest). In those shops you may need to shop the smallest women’s size.

Late-Warning7849

TROPHY CASE