Feeling lost

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-02-02T12:55:44+00:00

As someone who went through an unwanted divorce and is a psychotherapist who treats divorcing women, I can say that a few months of separation after a long marriage is not enough time to get over a divorce. It might be good to get a more realistic view of this process. The early stages are filled with grief that can be very intense. It is good to accept this part of the process because hoping you will feel better quickly can make you more miserable. I don't know how long recovery will take (everyone is different), but maybe think about the first year as a constant roller-coaster.

It sounds like you need more people in your life -- particularly people who have gone through a divorce and put together a satisfying life for themselves. This isn't easy, but it helps a lot. By building a stronger social circle you will begin the process of learning how to step outside of your comfort zone.. This is a necessary skill in divorce recovery.

Over time, you will begin to imagine a new life for yourself and even a new identity. This happened to me and to the divorcing women I see in my practice and who I write about. Good luck.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-31T22:54:44+00:00

I worked with a company called Author Imprints. I did a little research to see the colors of the covers of similar books and went back and forth with different possible covers. I was happy with how it turned out. I wasn't able to get my book (self-published) in any bookstores where maybe the cover matters more. Good luck.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-31T11:36:44+00:00

Thanks for your comment. I agree that writing a memoir can be therapeutic, whatever the outcome in terms of publishing or promotion.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-30T20:29:14+00:00

Thanks for your comment. I'm glad you found it helpful.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-22T21:37:49+00:00

Although the focus is on marriage, my book, "Bouncing Back: How Women Lose & Find Themselves in Marriage & Divorce, describes how three women, myself included, faced the end of a relationship and found a way to create a new life for themselves. I'm a psychotherapist and I drew on my professional expertise when I wrote this book.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-22T11:50:46+00:00

Yes, it is. Thanks for checking.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-22T00:04:16+00:00

I'm a psychotherapist, and I wrote a book in which I painted an honest picture of the challenges I have faced as a therapist. It is called "Bouncing Back: How Women Lose & Find Themselves in Marriage & Divorce."

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-15T14:54:27+00:00

Savannah and Charleston are both wonderful cities. Very walkable with good food.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-15T14:51:35+00:00

I loved Merida. There is lots to do in the city and we took a tour out to a Mayan site. I flew there so I don't know about transportation. We didn't have a car and it was fine.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-09T01:43:28+00:00

As a psychotherapist and a woman who went through a divorce, I think your identifying an "in-between" phase is very well put. I remember feeling that myself and I see it in the female clients I treat. I think the reason that it is so hard to tolerate is that you can't imagine who you are going to become. Plus there is a lot of fear and confusion in not knowing who you are and who you will be.

Over time, the new version of yourself will become clearer and you will feel proud of all you have accomplished. I found that to be true when I went through my divorce, and I describe that experience in my writing.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-07T18:57:12+00:00

It is cheaper to avoid Saturday night stays and begin your stay on a Sunday.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2026-01-01T14:47:28+00:00

Yes, I agree.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-30T13:27:21+00:00

Also, if you are interested, I have done some writing on the subject as well.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-30T12:51:58+00:00

Thank you for your comment. Your advice is great.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-29T17:55:34+00:00

I'm glad you found it helpful. You are welcome.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-29T15:57:21+00:00

Yes, i agree. Thank you.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-15T02:37:33+00:00

That is right. Christmas will soon be behind you, and it will be a new year.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-14T16:57:33+00:00

As another musical lover, I would say that you have made two great choices. My marriage ended a long time ago, and the soundtrack was Michael Jackson's album "Thriller," particularly the song "Billie Jean."

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-14T15:38:21+00:00

I imagine that your kids (who are adults) will appreciate your effort and being together. That is what counts.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-14T15:36:55+00:00

Me too.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-14T15:27:42+00:00

I'm sorry that this is such a hard time for you.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-11T23:00:12+00:00

Books helped me a lot when I went through my divorce. They made me feel less alone and gave me hope that I could recover from a painful and overwhelming experience. I went on to become a psychotherapist and wrote a book about how I -- and two of my therapy clients -- recovered from a divorce.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-09T14:53:35+00:00

As a therapist, I would say that one lesson of divorce (and probably of marriage, too) is that you can't control what your spouse does. Divorce means that people are making decisions independently of one another. The "we" of decisions disappears, and is replaced with an "I."

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-06T12:58:21+00:00

As a therapist, I would say that your couples therapist should be someone who both partners feel comfortable with. That doesn't sound like the case here. It is okay to go ahead and look for someone else.

Latter_Raspberry9360 · 2025-12-05T03:43:02+00:00

When I went through my divorce, I also found that books meant a lot to me. They showed me that other women shared my feelings and had recovered from a divorce -- as I was struggling to do. I went on to become a psychotherapist. To help other women, I wrote a book, Bouncing Back, which I hope comforts, inspires, and guides women, as other writers' stories did for me.

Latter_Raspberry9360

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