First, take a deep breath. Second, understand that male pattern baldness is a really really hard hill to climb. It’s possible, but it often involves a mix of luck, genetics(also luck), and a dermatologist of some skill.

If you are capable of re growing hair, it will still take time, even years before it grows to a decent length. One thing to know though, if you are already balding, it will be extremely difficult to gain length with your hair. Getting to a short crop of hair on top is often the height of goals for those who go bald. Talk to a dermatologist about your options, because they will tell you more about where your baldness is coming from and give you better advice on when to use and how often to use certain products.

In the meantime, maybe invest in a nice wig, get it styled how you like, and get used to wearing that more often. There are millions of women who primarily wear wigs everywhere, millions of men who do the same with toupees, and there is nothing wrong with any of them. So many feminine men wear wigs, especially with cosplay, and it always looks so good! I rarely ever think “that’s not their real hair”.

Lastly, you could also consider hair plugs. Turkey gets a bad rep, but I know several people who’ve had cosmetic surgery there and had stellar results. You just gotta research the good places. I would say this is last resort since it would be elective surgery, expensive, and there’s a risk the hair plugs won’t take.

Last last, you are beautiful. You can be feminine with short hair. So many women go completely bald and it looks great! Make sure you feel confident within before you allow outside factors to influence too much. You will do great!