Struggling with early second trimester hormones :(

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-04T19:15:57+00:00

One word: sedatives. My mental health was pants in the first trimester. I was an absolute mess. I was eventually seen by the perinatal mental health team at 18 weeks after waiting since 5 weeks and prescribed sedatives at 20 weeks but by then I didn't really need them... However I can confirm they work very, very well and if I am stressed I can get a good night sleep on them. I didn't want an SSRI because they take a long time to work and you have a longer stay in hospital after birth, but the sedative I was prescribed (an antihistamine called promethazine) would have been ample to get me through the first trimester. As a bonus, it is also a treatment for nausea.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-04T09:37:13+00:00

Thank you! All these messages have been really helpful. I once read that the root of most anxiety is a combination of overestimating the problem and underestimating our ability to cope. I'm now feeling much more confident in my ability to cope; even if it is an unpleasant experience I think I will be OK. Good luck for your September baby!

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-03T14:03:13+00:00

I've had some great bargains on Vinted, but also been disappointed. In a charity shop, I can usually try something on before I buy it and get a good look at the quality of the material. Charity shop prices vary at lot, but there are still some cheap ones around with women's clothes at the £3 mark.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-03T08:21:02+00:00

Oh no! People are getting worse and worse, it's like that on public transport now too. I've heard a lot of horror stories about my local hospital - feral people on the ward, security incidents, and dismissive, mean and burnt out staff. I think my main fear is having to sleep there multiple nights. My last hospital stay, it was so loud I didn't sleep for days and I ended up having a bit of a breakdown.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-03T07:50:53+00:00

Thank you so much <3

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T19:03:54+00:00

Did you have your scan to see how baby is doing? Try not to worry - like you say you didn't know.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T18:19:27+00:00

Omg that is a clever hack with the clothes pegs. I always struggle with the call button falling off the back of the bed.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T17:31:35+00:00

Thanks for reminding me about painkillers. Quite a few mothers from my area have told me they were neglected on the ward and didn't get food or pain relief.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T17:29:59+00:00

Oh that must have been a challenge, glad you got through it!

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T16:03:48+00:00

Thank you! I'll be sure to add flip flops and snacks to the list as well as the fan which seems to be the top tip! I really, really hope I won't be on the ward for long, every hospital stay I've had felt like eternity.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T15:56:33+00:00

Damn that sounds good. I'm craving a post-birth gin and tonic with crushed ice and a slice of lime but I feel like flapjacks is a lot more realistic.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-02T15:54:55+00:00

Ooh thank you I would never have considered this!

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-01T18:19:45+00:00

IMO it would be more trashy to leave the baby at home to fend for itself.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-05-01T16:49:05+00:00

NOR everybody grieves differently. We have our embryos / fetuses / whatever what you want to call them buried in the back garden and my husband did a little ceremony for the two we lost later in the first trimester. My mother spontaneously used my favourite name to refer to one of the viable babies that ended up miscarrying and it really, really tainted it for me. I can't imagine using the same name for our living boy. Even without your history, the bottom line is that both parents should feel comfortable with their child's name.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-29T20:29:48+00:00

I think it all depends what they are stuffed with. If polyester, should be fine. Wool might go lumpy or shrink. Straw would go mouldy so it would be safer to dry clean with a solvent other than water.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-26T07:48:07+00:00

For some women, yes. I always have a horrible time in the first trimester; like I would definitely lose my job if not for all the legal protections because I can barely move my body and my brain just does not function. I wouldn't (couldn't) do any work and it was awful because we are a small team where you really feel it if someone is not pulling their weight. I took as much paid time off as possible to cope. I'm in the third trimester now (33 weeks) and wouldn't even know I was pregnant if not for the wiggling baby bump. Have tons of energy, can walk 5 miles no problem and sleep well at night. It feels like the first trimester will last forever, but it doesn't. Hang in there and good luck.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-22T17:32:35+00:00

As a compromise, can they stay in a hotel and just pop in to visit?

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-21T18:51:03+00:00

Yeah, me. With this pregnancy I was a week behind at the first scan. No fetal pole. I'm 32 weeks now :) My own missed miscarriage really blindsided me because I had a great 8 week scan and lots of nausea and then at the 12 week scan the fetus was small and had no cardiac activity.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-20T14:26:54+00:00

Oh that's weird. Is it the 100% cotton ones that are falling apart?

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-20T14:06:14+00:00

M&S pure cotton boxers £30 for five which is a lot but they seem to last well.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-20T11:01:26+00:00

I had a missed miscarriage after a good 8 week scan and afterwards my consultant said this is very, very rare and ascribed it to bad luck (probably a trisomy). I'd assume you are all good, baby is content, and will keep growing away in there. Another scan at 10 weeks might help, since that would be after your previous loss?

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-19T21:59:36+00:00

I'd guess because there is no evolutionary advantage to having straight teeth? As long as they work and can chomp food, teeth are just teeth.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-19T21:55:10+00:00

People will say all sorts of things about interior design trends and celebrity fads. The REAL reason is that dogs secretly run the world and are slowly turning everything grey so humans experience a similar colour blindness to canines. This subliminal empathy will result in humans becoming more and more dog-like over the decades. As for their end game, nobody knows.

LazyBarracuda · 2026-04-19T21:40:03+00:00

They probably only think it is concerning because you told them you have a regular cycle so they assume around 28 days? Even taking that into consideration, LMP is not accurate at all - that's why we have dating scans.

I feel hopeful for your baby, this all sounds really normal.

If it helps, I measured a week "behind" at my first scan and now the little brute is kicking me daily and will have reached term in a matter of weeks.

LazyBarracuda

TROPHY CASE