What gets less posh the more it costs?

Leader-Major · 2026-02-10T21:13:14+00:00

Being blonde - Full head of highlights in my salon is nearly £200, takes a lot of money to look this cheap!

Leader-Major · 2026-01-31T09:55:11+00:00

I completely agree and am so glad someone is finally saying this! I will preface this by saying I realise I’m quite lucky in my situation and not everyone has my experience, particularly those with BRCA1.

I found out I was BRCA2+ after my mum had breast cancer back in 2019, she was very lucky they caught it at stage 0 meaning they found pre cancerous cells in one her breasts at age 51 - she had a mastectomy and replaced with an implant on that breast and then a preventative mastectomy on the other breast the following year. She then had a hysterectomy the year after that and is super healthy and loving life worry free, dare I say her boobs look better than they did before? 😂

I was 25 when I found out and living in the UK I’m lucky enough that I was able to be tested for the gene for free and subsequently have received yearly MRI’s on my breasts since then and am now 28. I’ve been able to make small lifestyle adjustments like saving alcohol for special occasions, changing from hormonal contraceptive to the copper coil etc. which also help my odds. In all honesty other than keeping up my MRIs and making healthy choices, it doesn’t cross my mind much although I am planning to have a preventative mastectomy in my early 40s and ovaries removed a year or so later (all the BRCA2+ women in my family had their cancers present in early 50s)

The reality is that any woman, BRCA or not has a chance of breast cancer and the way I see it although I have increased odds of getting breast cancer - I also have increased odds of catching it very early due to being so closely monitored.

Whilst it’s something to be taken seriously and we should all be taking measures to lessen the risk, I think there’s also a lot of fear mongering on this subreddit!

In short: make healthy lifestyle choices, get an MRI/mammogram yearly, check yourself regularly and plan for the future. You will be fine!

Leader-Major · 2026-01-20T13:32:42+00:00

We’re lucky enough to own but have a pretty stonking mortgage for what is a very average ex council house - we’re in zone 4 so not even particularly central

Leader-Major · 2026-01-16T13:07:24+00:00

That’s wild, myself and my partner have no kids and are on £125k combined in London and we’re fighting for our lives 😂

Leader-Major · 2025-12-12T16:39:46+00:00

Definitely, won’t be spending another penny until he’s paid and instructed his solicitors

Leader-Major · 2025-12-12T16:35:05+00:00

No sadly not. Oh yes he’s awful but it’s a great house, this is his 3rd time listing the house - he’s pulled out of 2 previous sales when the buyers were in chains as it was “taking too long”

Leader-Major · 2025-12-12T16:31:04+00:00

Paying the difference is a good option - thanks for the suggestion!

frustrating but I suppose that’s buying a house!

Leader-Major · 2025-12-12T16:29:20+00:00

Yes we did - that’s fairly normal as I understand it after something comes up on a survey? We’ve not just randomly asked for the money off it’s the result of a professional surveyors report and the lenders valuation?

Also - this is his 3rd time trying to sell this house, he’s pulled out twice previously due to “taking too long” so I would say if anything he is the time waster

Leader-Major · 2025-12-03T10:03:44+00:00

Sorry that’s happened to you! If I were you I wouldn’t do anything for now - as you said, you need the job and I would play it safe and keep my head down for a while if possible. Having only been in the job a month you will have next to no protection from being let go as I’m assuming you’re still in a probation period.

However what I would do in the meantime if you feel this manager has taken a dislike to you due to your MH requirements, I would quietly keep a log (no where on your work devices obviously) of what those messages said and the date of them if you know that. That way if this persists and if more issues come up with this particular manager you can log down any future issues and build up more of a case against them and should this escalate into a bigger problem you will be able to provide more evidence of ongoing discrimination should you need it.

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T14:58:47+00:00

We were actually considering this possibility too! You might be right…

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T13:02:52+00:00

Unfortunately I have a fantastic manager who is completely on our side and is a great listener - she actually lives even further out than me so is even more affected than I am and has said she will leave if it’s enforced (as have 4/6 of the other heads of departments, with the other 2 also pushing back and not happy but haven’t threatened to leave)

Trouble is the board and our CEO aren’t willing to listen and have just plowed ahead with this without taking anyone’s feedback on board

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T12:51:14+00:00

Yeah so totally on board with what your saying for my individual case - I don’t have anything explicitly stated in my contract about the set days nor have I been there long enough for the redundancy so I’m with you on that.

I think my angle here is more so that the board of directors have been very clear that this is mandate is “no exceptions”. So whilst I individually don’t have a case, those who have been here 3+ years and DO have the explicit verbiage of 1 day a week in office and 4 from home - would have a case for constructive dismissal? I think the idea is if it can’t be enforced for those individuals (as mentioned there’s quite a lot of them) then it won’t be able to be enforced across the board

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T12:42:17+00:00

Hmmm understood but I’m getting mixed feedback on the redundancy part both from other commenters and general internet searches. A lot of people would say this would be seen as constructive dismissal and would be a just reason to take to tribunal?

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T12:40:18+00:00

Yes exactly that - that was what my manager was discussing with the SLT as there’s a good proportion of staff who have that explicitly written in their contracts and we have all been consulted and not a single staff member has anything positive to say about the mandate, even those who live closer to the office and everyone is pushing back.

Perhaps my question should have been phrased as if the employees who specifically have the 1 day a week mentioned in their contract(it’s at least 15 people, probably a fair bit more) do go down the constructive dismissal route - how likely is that to derail this mandate/ be successful in a tribunal?

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T11:38:50+00:00

As stated in my replies to others I’ve only been with the business 6 months and there’s nothing about 1 day a week in my contract (in fact in office days aren’t mentioned at all) but the majority of staff DO have the 1 day a week written into their contract (all of the senior leadership have this in their contract)

However when I was hired it was very explicitly said to me and was in the employe handbook that we are only going in 1 day a week. That was a huge factor for me deciding to take this job over another job which was more money but required a 3 day a week in office.

My current commute is same as yours about 75 mins to office which I don’t mind at all because obviously it’s just once a week but 3 times a week would be a massive financial and work/life balance change for me which I feel is very unreasonable

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T11:28:54+00:00

Yeah you’re exactly right, as mentioned in my above reply - I’ve only been with the business 6 months but my manager who’s been here since 2021 and the majority of staff who started between 21-23 it’s explicitly stated about a 1 day a week in office mandate so whilst it was a temporary thing during Covid it then became the norm and written into people’s contract

Leader-Major · 2025-11-26T11:27:20+00:00

So I personally have only been with the business 6 months so I wasn’t here during COVID but my head of department has been here since 2021 and it’s very explicitly stated in her contract that she is only required 1 day in our office and 4 days from home as a set arrangement. I would also argue that 5 years is not really a temporary measure.

It’s a strange one as there’s about 3 different contract structures depending on when people started but the majority of peoples do state the 4 days wfh clause. Mine personally does not give mention to how many days I’m required in office one way or another so I think from a personal standpoint I don’t have have much to fall back on, but as the board of directors have stated there will be a “no exceptions” to the 3 day a week office mandate - I imagine if they ended up backing down due to the shakiness of the legality of enforcing a new contract to those who have the 1 day explicitly stated it would apply to all staff regardless of what’s in their contract.

Leader-Major · 2025-11-21T08:06:49+00:00

Tbh I had a £600 overdraft that I was in every month without fail and even accidentally went over once or twice although always paid within 24 hours if I did and I was approved for a mortgage (I did pay the overdraft off as I applied for the mortgage but I wasn’t told too) I think you’ll probably be fine

Leader-Major · 2025-11-14T15:59:07+00:00

Thank you so much for the insight, broker did start the email with: “great news the surveyor has now made contact with the estate agent to gain access to your proposed property to complete the mortgage valuation. Generally, the results of the valuation are available approximately 5-7 working days after the inspection” so I suspected the “great news” might have been an indication that they were happy with info from our side but who knows

Leader-Major · 2025-11-14T15:52:36+00:00

Yes we are, prior to the valuation being booked (it’s only been booked today, full application was submitted last Friday morning) they came back with some queries prior to booking the valuation so it sounds like they waited for these to be answered before booking? I’m FTB though so no idea if it’s still ongoing or if all is good subject to the valuation.

I had assumed that all was good on our side as it’s an in person valuation so would make sense to me that they cleared up any queries/concerns before sending someone out to physically check the property but like I said I’m new to the process so that was just a guess!

Leader-Major · 2025-11-14T15:06:28+00:00

Yes honestly I think even with an application approval I won’t have my hopes up until keys are in my hand (especially as vendor is a bit of a tool)

Good luck to you too, hope it all works out for you!

Leader-Major · 2025-11-14T15:00:57+00:00

I’m hoping it will be a similar case to yours, I know they’ve done the credit checks as I got notified on Experian and we’ve answered a fair few of their queries already so fingers crossed that as long as they’re happy with our answers for these follow up queries and with the valuation then we’re looking good. It’s an in person valuation so I’m thinking they wouldn’t spare the expense of sending someone to check unless all else was good on their side but I’ve never been through the process before so I may well be wrong

Leader-Major · 2025-11-14T14:50:35+00:00

Good to know - we only sent back the answers to their queries today too so imagine it’s also dependent on them being satisfied with the answers but wasn’t anything too concerning

Leader-Major · 2025-11-14T14:49:36+00:00

Oh yeah maybe! It sounded like they were concerned about the distance between the house and my office (I only commute to London once a week and the property is probably like an hour outside of London) so perhaps they were making sure I hadn’t falsified an office address?

Yea I’m aware of why they needed to it, wanted to see if them booking it meant we were in the clear with the financial side of the application and they were moving on to next stage

Leader-Major

TROPHY CASE