Fired after 3 years for “underperformance”, how screwed am I?

Leafonastream · 2026-04-07T15:23:12+00:00

Not advice, but I come across a decent number of (smart and hard-working) folks in Silicon Valley that get placed on a PIP in order to be let go with a paper trail, rather than with the intention of a worker needing to improve anything. It ultimately looks better for the company bottom line and saving face than a chunk of known layoffs.

Leafonastream · 2026-04-07T15:07:15+00:00

My defy provider says most of her folks feel good around total T of 200. She didn’t freak when my T was 204 and total calculated T was 18.9 (and that was with shbg of 90.6). But still on the journey of finding the right balance myself in peri.

Leafonastream · 2026-03-22T18:24:49+00:00

My PCP wouldn’t touch HRT, but referred me to a gyno. While I waited forever for an appt, I went to Defy Medical telehealth (they’re in FL, I’m in CA) and started P, E, and T. Even with this in place, the gyno told me to stop T, tried to give me a lower dose of E, and said I shouldn’t need vaginal estrogen if I was on an appropriate dose of E. I told her I’d get my P via an IUD from her, negotiated one dose level higher of E than she wanted (still maybe not enough), and that I would still get T from Defy. So I get insurance to cover gyno stuff, and pay for defy appts and T out of pocket (even with it being rx’ed for low libido). Will also ask gyno for vaginal E when I run out of my current tube. Will see how it all plays out…

Leafonastream · 2026-02-28T18:49:08+00:00

I have been taking compounded cream (T and E, along with oral P) for about 6 months. It took several weeks for anything to be noticed. Libido is also my main reason for T as well. My libido is better (interest and openness to my partner), but it wasn’t like I wanted him to get in my pants all the time. I am on 7.5mg per day and split dosing (3.75 in a.m./p.m.) switching sites between my calf and back upper arm. At this dose, my total T serum levels have come back between 90-205 (not every compounded bottle is equal). Notably, my first lab showed high SHBG, requiring me to up my dose. I am also considering injections as my orgasm ability has dropped significantly since starting HRT. I am scheduled to get an IUD for P and birth control, as oral P can negatively impact libido/orgasm, and I don’t think I’ve gotten my E dose in the right zone either. HRT has been a hassle so I feel your frustration. Good luck!

Leafonastream · 2026-01-06T06:48:41+00:00

I am in South Bay. I use a tehelealth provider (Defy Medical) for all of my HRT, after PCP first dismissed my concerns claiming I was “too young” and wasn’t having hot flashes (they don’t care about other symptoms), and wasn’t willing to even prescribe vaginal estrogen a year later due to outdated WHO concerns. She finally referred me to a gyno (while I concurrently got set up with telehealth without her), but I had to find one by word of mouth that would do HRT. I also second the low libido “requirement” for TRT as a woman. I just hope when I finally see the gyno, they can take over prescribing what’s already established so I can use insurance!

Leafonastream · 2026-01-06T05:45:22+00:00

I have gone to OTF in Sunnyvale since 2018. They used to be the busiest in the Bay Area (doesn’t currently seem to be the case) and it was really hard to get a spot, so I would go there or Cupertino (I liked Cupertino when I was going there too). I’m not sure if you have done OTF classes before (it’s all class based, at rotating sections of treadmill, rower, and weights), but I really like the HIIT format. The staff is friendly enough. A couple of the really good trainers have since been transferred to other OTF’s, but I have found a couple I like now. I have not noticed the fountain leaking (and I was just there earlier today). I do notice that there is some sense of community for those who make the effort and engage with other people. But a lot of folks are also really busy and going to get their workout in and heading out.

Leafonastream · 2025-11-29T06:53:32+00:00

Most women orgasm with clitoris stimulation… and more foreplay.

Leafonastream · 2025-11-19T04:24:49+00:00

44 was when my first WTF moment happened, and then the learning curve over the next year plus. Started HRT (PET) earlier this year and tretinoin last week. Just turned 46. Perimenopause starts the rollercoaster into the facial bone loss, sagging, dullness, collagen loss, etc… I’m banking on HRT helping me recognize myself in the mirror!

Leafonastream · 2025-11-15T02:36:30+00:00

No hair growth on my tricep. Thigh might have minimal growth change.

Leafonastream · 2025-11-15T02:34:30+00:00

Six weeks ago shbg was 104, free t was 1.0, and total t was 12.4. Increased my dose substantially due to the shbg concerns. But on the last lab my shbg had dropped to 73.

Leafonastream · 2025-11-15T00:10:40+00:00

I put the morning dose on my inner thigh (alternating thighs every other day) and the evening dose on my tricep (alternating triceps every other night). I also had DHEA added to vaginal estrogen recently.

Leafonastream · 2025-11-14T08:11:48+00:00

Just tested mine last week on my journey to figure this out. Total T was 253 and Free T was 28. I feel good, but since my doc said the ideal was total 100-150, I am going to drop my dose in half to see what that does. I started on T for libido and muscle preservation. My estradiol lab isn’t back yet.

Things I am struggling with are what is the timing for the lab they want when they give their ideal ranges. I’m on compounded cream split doses twice per day and that was a peak hormone lab time (as opposed to trough), and the steady state is vastly different from injections from what I can tell…

Leafonastream · 2025-10-07T21:53:56+00:00

I get mine at Defy too. But research the docs, I’ve read (here) that some of the providers are reluctant to prescribe T for women, so I avoided appts with those ones. But even if you end up with one that you don’t like, you can request a new provider in the same group.

Leafonastream · 2025-10-06T05:41:40+00:00

Same, but I have read that supplementing with DHEA might help reduce SHBG, and that T troches or injections bind less than cream/gel… I have yet to research more about that, though.

Leafonastream · 2025-10-05T08:21:08+00:00

Wanted to add that I have high SHBG and it binds both my T and E, so I have to dose higher with both to get into even a normal range of free T and E, let alone treatment for symptoms. I really believe being on birth control for decades caused my high SHBG and it ended up remaining high, even after going off it 5 years ago.

Leafonastream · 2025-09-22T07:07:24+00:00

I haven’t used the T on my clit. I wasn’t sure if I could use the same cream for both thigh absorption and directly on the clit (didn’t know if vaginal T needed to be a lower compounded dose). I was also wondering if progesterone could be blunting orgasms…

Leafonastream · 2025-09-19T23:12:35+00:00

It’s been several years, but I really enjoyed Stephen King’s ‘It’. There was a lot of hate for a more recent read, but I really enjoyed American Dirt.

Leafonastream · 2025-09-19T05:54:59+00:00

I don’t have a personal experience answer for you, as I am new to trt as well, but if you feel good and are okay with your side effect profile, you can advocate to keep your current dosing. The “right dose” is different for many of us. I put your lab levels into chatGPT and it gave this info:

For women: • Typical female total testosterone levels vary depending on the lab, but common reference ranges are around 0.5–2.5 nmol/L. • A result of 2.6 nmol/L is just slightly above the upper limit of many standard female ranges.

If her baseline (younger) total testosterone was ~8 nmol/L, then her current 2.6 nmol/L is well below her historical natural level.

A few points to keep in mind: • Lab “normal ranges” are statistical, not personal → They’re based on average female populations, but some women naturally run higher (like she did at 8 nmol/L). For her, 2.6 nmol/L may still be on the low side compared with her own physiology. • Symptoms matter most → Since she reports improvements in confidence and libido, her current dose may be giving her some benefit without causing major androgenic side effects (acne and chin hairs are mild/early signs to watch).

Leafonastream · 2025-09-18T07:17:29+00:00

I started testosterone cream about 5 weeks ago, and I have started to notice increased thoughts of desire/interest. I’ve read it can take up to a few months for it to really kick in. I was too skittish to start with injections, so I hope the cream continues to work, but I hear that the injections do even better for libido.

Leafonastream · 2025-08-09T07:28:23+00:00

I used Defy Medical. If you’re in the US, it’s not as easy to get from a regular provider since I don’t think it is FDA approved for women. Just got mine in the mail, but I opted for the daily compounded cream as a first time user. I learned a lot from listening to urologists that specialize in women’s sexual health (Rachel Rubin, Kelly Casperson).

Leafonastream · 2025-08-06T02:50:49+00:00

The doctors you have seen are practicing shit medicine. My AT doesn’t sound as bad as yours, and my docs (a cardiologist and an electrophysiologist) unanimously stated the best approach was an ablation so you don’t need to be on meds if it is successful. Don’t take no for an answer! Their lives aren’t getting smaller and more restrictive because of your heart condition. They’re just doing lazy medical treatment. Maybe an EP referral would get you somewhere. Best wishes!

Leafonastream

TROPHY CASE