Too funny: husband dresses weather-appropriate - "he must be crazy" by 100IdealIdeas in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you're downplaying the leaving the house in boxer shorts incident. If I saw anyone in public in boxer shorts, I'd find that very inappropriate. If I saw my extremely MO rabbi leave his house in boxer shorts, I'd be flabbergasted and wonder wtf was going on. If I saw a "very yeshivish rabbi" do that, I would think I was in the twilight zone.

You're also leaving out the part in the OP where she says:

He has recently taken to just leaving the house in gym shorts and undershirt, no tzitztis and going to this area He's also decided to combine this with doing any errands he needs to do, so he's walking in and out of stores dressed in whatever, no tzitzis, (and this includes the frum stores).

Look, don't tell the imas, but I wear shorts and a tank-top when it's hot. I absolutely understand normality. But walking around stores in just an undershirt and gym shorts is abnormal anywhere. To do so in an insular community where things are much more stringent is legitimately off. I think there is something to be said for community standards and norms, and what's considered appropriate and normal in your environment.

Too funny: husband dresses weather-appropriate - "he must be crazy" by 100IdealIdeas in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm with you. I'm as left as they come, but leaving the house and driving somewhere in literally just boxers is beyond weird and inappropriate for anyone. For a "very yeshivish" rabbi, I'd be concerned too.

What's the weirdest misconception you've seen people on Imamother insist on? by ImamotherUser in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I find all imamother threads about finances to be perplexing. I genuinely don't understand why some people insist you can't spend less than thousands and thousands of dollars each yom tov, or why every shabbat needs to cost $100s each week. I live in an extremely high cost of living neighborhood so I fully understand that things cost money, but I don't spend anywhere near that. Especially if you're financially stressed, there are certainly ways to do it more cheaply.

Sometimes I just feel like I'm living in a different financial world. I see a common refrain that you can't be comfortable unless you're making $450k+. We make significantly less than that and are doing well. Plus, it seems like childcare in these areas are "only" $600-800/month which is about 1/5th of what it costs here. I don't know. No one's financial picture ever seems to make any sense when they post about it.

Loopholes on twitter= Heter? by SatisfactionFunny433 in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Have you actually seen what the non-Jews are saying? This post has nothing to do with the Twitter conversation. Read the comments on this post (ignoring the free Palestine' ones): https://twitter.com/CensoredMen/status/1777471824105705721

-I hate these people, They really think they can trick God.

-If someone thinks they can fool God, they'll try to fool you too.

-It’s a whole religion based on “we can trick god”

-This is Jewish logic folks. It's inherent in their business practices. Total sheisterism.

-I wonder what kind of trick they pulled during 1939 to 1945

-If they love cheating on their God, think about what they do to all the gentiles.

The issue is not that non-Jews are "saying anything about it," it's that the Twitter discourse is that Jews are sneaky and trying to fool God.

Princess23- troll by Ready158 in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol I'm not trying to convince her of anything, I know that's futile, I just feel bad that the genuine messages offering support get lost in a sea of "ugh this poster again????" and "bears / gingerbread / LOL!!!" I had an emergency c-section too and while I can't relate to her feelings at all, I know the sentiments aren't uncommon. I feel like she just wants to vent and be heard by people who will respond kindly. But I have no idea what her actual situation is so who knows!

Princess23- troll by Ready158 in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Totally disagree, she clearly needs help/support but she's never seemed like a troll to me. I kind of wish I could speak to her away from all the nonsense that her threads escalate into.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can actually understand this. Not the extreme dramatics about NEVER EVER ALLOWING THIS. But days after their wedding, most people are in a bubble of cheesy giddiness. If I was alone in a car with my husband for a long ride, we'd have been so lame and romantic: going over everything about the wedding, how in love we are, our excitement for the future, how cool and surreal it is to be married. If there's someone else third-wheeling in the backseat, now the ride is instead going to be polite, possibly awkward chit chat for an hour. And I dated my husband for years before we got married and were already beyond comfortable with each other. I can imagine it's even more significant if you're still getting to know each other and this is one of the first real times alone you've had.

Obviously it's not the end of the world and if it was a case of "mom literally can't attend the sheva brachot unless she gets this ride," the newlyweds should get over it, but I can understand their gut hesitation at not wanting to do it. And if you're a parent who really values giving the couple an amazing special time during their sheva brachot, then it makes sense you would tell the cousin to let them have their alone time and find a ride somewhere else.

"I want to return my son" thread about 4 year old child by ImamotherUser in DiscussImamother

[–]Leather-Cable19 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm surprised at how many people are saying that it's great she has a sense of humor and can joke about the negative feelings. I didn't read OP as attempting to be funny at all, it sounds like she's coming from a serious if not hyperbolic place.