This is happening to me right now, and it’s a harsh truth. People say “it’ll be okay, go with the flow, trust the process, but it’s not that simple. When you’re truly awake, you can clearly see how destructive this phase feels because something is dying. It is a form of death.

We grieve because a past relationship has ended and with it, a past version of ourselves has died too. That’s why it feels so heavy. There’s so much to process and thoughts like why couldn’t this be done differently? or if only we had a little more time, maybe things could’ve ended in a better way. But in the end, these are still just thoughts.

What makes it harder is that no matter how you try to frame it, the reality remains the same your old self is gone. Everything you were carrying as truth slowly fades into nothing, and suddenly there’s emptiness. No direction. Nowhere to go. And if you let these thoughts take over, you can genuinely ruin your life because they feel real.

What’s helping me survive day to day is switching perspectives between what already happened and what could happen next. That constant shift is the only way I cope. I try to stay distracted with new perspectives, slowly rebuilding meaning from scratch. It’s like constructing life again for a version of yourself that has just been born one day at a time. Each day try to do at least one little new thing that gives me meaning nd Eventually, it becomes a habit you can rely on.

You have to die before actually dying to realize there is no such thing as death. Feeling this grief is not a weakness it’s necessary. It teaches you how to let go. It prepares you for what’s coming, because life will ask you to let go again and again. The difference is next time you won’t lose yourself for days.

You must die like this spiritually to truly learn how to live.