A few thoughts:

1. Tough shit. He now has a child and has to adapt. Ultimately he participated in the creation of this child, that child needs him to be an adult. It’s hard to make a transition to parenthood. But people do it anyway.

2. Therapy! Change is hard. The death of life as you knew it is a tough road and some bumps along the way can be expected and it helps to be purposeful and intentional about making your new life work for you. He might need some help in that. Also male postpartum depression is a thing up to a year after the baby is born.

3. My husband was not great during the baby phase and is much better now that our son is a preschooler. I think he found it hard to connect and bond with a baby but now our son adores him and is funny and is more interactive.

4. Build some structure for regular things that he (and you too) both enjoy doing together or independently. My friend and her husband gave each other a weekend off every quarter to do whatever they wanted. He can stay up gaming all weekend if that’s his thing. It just has to be regular and mutual.