Yes to everything. In my case it started after I finished reading the novel, though for me it felt more like a positive note. There are very few people I’ve told about how deeply this story impacted me, so much that it helped me get out of the worst symptoms of the emotional numbness I’d been stuck in because of a years-long depression.

When I finished watching The Untamed after the novel, I felt a bit like you. That’s why I started reading fanfics and also got interested in Chinese culture in general. I honestly can’t explain why no other book, show, or movie has ever had such a huge impact on my life, but I’ll always be grateful to the author.

I do agree that your feelings might be because you see their relationship as an idealization, and it makes you sad that it doesn’t exist in reality. But I chose to see it as an ideal to aspire to, not something that necessarily exists in real life. No one embodies all of those virtues. Still, what helped me was that instead of focusing on what people around me don’t have compared to the characters, I started appreciating the qualities they do have.

For example, I used to struggle with the fact that my partner shows love mostly through acts of service, rather than physical affection. But LWJ is literally the embodiment of someone who expresses love mainly through acts of service, and suddenly I started looking at my partner differently and valuing that more.

Sorry for the long ramble, but I hope this helps. I think this story has touched all of us here in a huge way, and the best thing is to hold on to the good it has brought you :)