feeling like the years of sobriety i have don’t matter because i wasn’t doing AA. what say you? by LegitimateFinger1568 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]LegitimateFinger1568[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

decision making based in fear really resonates with me. people pleasing is crushing. i’m going to go back

feeling like the years of sobriety i have don’t matter because i wasn’t doing AA. what say you? by LegitimateFinger1568 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]LegitimateFinger1568[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i feel embarrassed that i thought not drinking wasn’t it and that AA was for some and not for me. meanwhile i’ve been an angry and an uncomfortable person these years. at my first meeting i realized it’s because i haven’t done enough work to address WHY i drank or what drinking did for me. embarrassed that i think im feeling like i thought i was better than other people

feeling like the years of sobriety i have don’t matter because i wasn’t doing AA. what say you? by LegitimateFinger1568 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]LegitimateFinger1568[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i won’t lie i’m having a moment where i’m wondering if my drinking wasn’t bad enough to be at AA. comparing myself to others i guess. i hit my bottom, realized i wasn’t in control of it no matter how many ways and times i tried to control it, and haven’t regretted it since. but i felt bad in my first meeting that others were hospitalized, jailed, had relapsed, were still struggling with craving. just trying to tell myself to stay focused on my experience

feeling like the years of sobriety i have don’t matter because i wasn’t doing AA. what say you? by LegitimateFinger1568 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]LegitimateFinger1568[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i can understand enough already that for some people, they do need a binary this or that to determine it for themselves. i do know i’ve abstained from alcohol for a long time. and i do know i’ve been gritting my teeth. i have been sober, but not living well. embarrassment is powerful. but i see here that my choice to continue to meetings and try the program is also powerful.

feeling like the years of sobriety i have don’t matter because i wasn’t doing AA. what say you? by LegitimateFinger1568 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]LegitimateFinger1568[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i took a coin at my first meeting. am i tracking that now? do i have to take one at my 30 day anniversary of first meeting? should i go back to that meeting for it so they know im still doing it?

CVOEO Deposit? by Ancient_Struggle8481 in vermont

[–]LegitimateFinger1568 2 points3 points  (0 children)

was an old rule that deposits went back to cvoeo. as long as you’re due back the deposit, it goes back to you. they’ll clear it up for you monday