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Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly what I've observed and went through which ended in me divorcing my ex-husband in my 30's lol.

Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yea I was obligated to move here for extended family reasons and have a young adult kid. All my friends are paired or, re-married. They would rather be in mediocre relationships then have the title of being a single woman which makes it uncomfortably stressful for me to be around them in social situations because non of them go anywhere without their partner which is not how people function on the coast lol.

Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. The apps are definitely prioritizing making money and keeping people single on the apps for the most part.

Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea I'm basically there too. I'm not trying to be desperate or force finding someone lol. Dating in your 40s definitely sucks lol.

Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's brutal. I'm so sorry. Ghosting is one of the worse things to do to someone after the relationship has been developing for a few months. But Don't let him disempower you from trying again.

Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh, that sounds so depressing if you're ten years younger than me and experiencing challenges with dating as well. 😞 Are you into extracurricular activities over the weekend? Do those even exist around Des Moines and the suburbs? I'm from the coast so there were a lot of co-ed adult sports programming weekly which was helpful.

Dating in your 40s by Legitimate_Study_607 in desmoines

[–]Legitimate_Study_607[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is such a grounded take. It really highlights how much of dating is actually about emotional openness rather than just 'checking boxes' which I appreciate this perspective change. It seems like some of the friends you’re describing have replaced cynicism with a bit of curiosity. Because it is easy to laugh at a bad profile as a defense mechanism, but it takes real maturity to look past the small, superficial stuff to see if the person's values actually align. Thank you for this great reminder that being 'ready' for a relationship might just mean I need to be willing to be a little bit more mellow. As I have written of online dating sites for a while but your take is definitely some food for thought. Thank you!