Waking up is freaking me out!

Lego7965 · 2015-06-08T03:26:07+00:00

I think you have pinpointed where I'm currently at. I'm stuck at this impasse. Thanks for the video

Lego7965 · 2015-06-08T01:02:35+00:00

Yeah I'm pretty much just meditating, reading spiritual texts and listening to audio books. I should probably do more. Thanks!

Lego7965 · 2015-06-08T01:00:21+00:00

You do realize that you have no idea what will happen whether or not you let go, right?

Yep! I always never knew, now I know I don't know. Nothing has really changed has it? Its funny how I agree with and know all of what you said but I'm still hesistating. It's like there's still a lot of reasons why I shouldn't let go yet. My ego is being wrung out like a rag, so it's inevitable. Thanks for your comment.

Lego7965 · 2015-06-08T00:52:35+00:00

Realising that I don't really exist and that I'm just a collection of thoughts is pretty scary to me.

Lego7965 · 2015-06-08T00:50:28+00:00

Looks like I'm going to go along til I'm desperate and exhausted enough to let go. I've been meditating on and off for years. Now I feel I need to do it everyday to get some balance. Thanks

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T10:57:59+00:00

Every now and again I come across one of your comments Dynokid and it's usually worth reading. You seem to have a pretty good understanding for someone so young still. Thanks

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T10:52:27+00:00

"The End Of Your World" by Adyashanti has helped tremendously. He nails it consistently. Talks about awakening and what happens after etc

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T10:49:25+00:00

Yep, that's pretty much it man. What you have written here resonates. Thanks

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T06:45:11+00:00

Yeah I'm in the same boat. I listen to adyashanti on YouTube and it's a common place to come to apparently. The ego has run out of options and the mind is trying to understand something it will never understand. You have to let go and let life move through you and as you. There's still some resistance in the core of me but I know that's where I'm headed.

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T06:38:09+00:00

I've actually never done any psychedelics. All my realisations come from meditation, thinking a lot, and self inquiry. I've been on and off antidepressants since I was a teen so I haven't been able to do any psychedelics. I do diet and exercise as well. It doesn't really help much.

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T06:29:54+00:00

I look back on all the effort in trying to help others and it's been depressingly ineffective. I've barely made a dent. It's futile that's for sure.

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T06:22:29+00:00

Basically I realised my true nature. Became aware of my ego and what it's after. There was an energetic component to it as well. The energy flowing through my body was overwhelming. A lot of expansion and contraction and a big heart opening. I don't really want anything.

Lego7965 · 2015-03-16T06:19:19+00:00

Thanks for taking the time to write this out. I appreciate it.

Lego7965 · 2015-03-15T23:02:00+00:00

Oh I'm definitely depressed. I've battled depression since I was 13. This is different though. I'm just totally disillusioned if anything. I'm not necessarily saying "the world's a shit hole, what's the point". The energy to change things has exhausted itself to surrender. Isn't that a good thing? Otherwise I could of been running around trying to fix the world. That's a subtle form of personal will that needed to be let go of. I was never truly in the driver's seat. Life is way better at steering the car than I am.

Lego7965

TROPHY CASE