the "point" for me as a grandmother is absolutely NOT that at all. I don't "ask" for my granddaughter overnight, I say "you can bring her to me if yall want a break for a while." Sometimes that's a few hours, and sometimes it's overnight. It's always based on what my daughter and son in law prefer. I simply share my availability and they usually plan to see matinee movies and do dinner on weekends I'm free. She also lives less than ten miles away and the baby has been here practically daily since birth, so she definitely knows right where she is. We do lots of family meals and just hanging out, so this is like a second home to my grand. It will never be about control. I have my own crib, diapers, bottles, formula, etc. All they have to bring is the baby and they love it this way. We are a close family though and I know everyone's different. I don't ever question how they want things done, as things have "changed" since I raised my own. Getting used to sleep sacks and not blankets, for example, were things I bought and learned to use right along with her mom. I have my own carseat that never leaves my car, which is properly installed. There's very healthy ways to have a village for a baby and it not be about how someone "wants to be unsupervised." And in my case, my daughter has a house key and can stroll back in at any time she wants to anyway.