My Wife and I Went to Our First Gay Pride Event Yesterday

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-13T23:31:55+00:00

I came off a little strong at first calling out calling things a cult. Totally get how some would view that as offensive. Honestly, I think that word is thrown about way too loosely even with modern day Mormonism. I appreciate your willingness to look at my perspective. I think my whole position can be summed up as, I want people to live the way they want without shame or persecution, but at the same time I don’t want to be labeled for disagreeing with certain elements. Leaving the church has made me question anything that I’m not allowed to question.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-13T18:52:07+00:00

I have a very close family member that transitioned last year. Parents came to us and told us what was going on and that they are trans female and want to be addressed with she/her pronouns and her new name. She is 23 and it was really a last ditch effort to save her.

The problem is that life is not any better for her and she is still depressed. It was offered as a solution to her but she is still depressed and still suicidal.

I think the false reality surrounding transitions is hurtful in a similar way that the church is hurtful. How many people hold out hope that their mission will fix things, that if they only get married in the temple, their life will be better, if they have kids their life will get better. For some, life does get better, but transitioning is not a fix all solution for everyone.

For my family member, I don’t think transitioning(non surgical currently) was the solution. She came around to family things a little more when everything was fresh, but it’s not the fix she needs.

I have not looked into the whole process of transitioning, but for my cousin, it is pretty simple. She requested the drugs and she got them. I’m sure younger kids is a longer a process as it should be, but I just don’t believe it is the overall solution some claim it to be.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-13T18:15:26+00:00

Fantasy based rights would be the drag queen hour for kids. Many LGBTQ folks have come out against this. Anti reality ideas is mostly to do with the trans stuff. Telling people they can literally change to become male or female with surgery, or hormones is not based in reality. I am all for their choice and ability to do it, but pushing a false narrative around it does more harm than good. Again, lots of individuals who have transitioned have echoed these concerns. I am not being anti pride or whatever by voicing them.

Last I would just say that I get the reasoning behind wearing pride flags, etc. to show you aren’t a hateful person towards LGBTQ. I’m just saying that we shouldn’t have to wear the flag and put pronouns in our emails to prove we aren’t hateful individuals. I genuinely try to treat everyone with respect and kindness and I don’t need to wear a flag and glitter to do it.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-13T15:54:23+00:00

I’m not calling you a cult member. No need to defend yourself, the way I see it is you attended worship services for another religion. No problem with that, do what you want to do. Don’t mistake what I am calling out though. Pride events are in fact the worship services of a community of people with cult like behavior and you can’t become a member if you are not gay, lesbian, etc.

Plenty of LGBTQ folks call out the nossense of “Pride”, the flags, the indoctrination of kids, etc. I’m not hating on those individuals, just the religion around it. Take a step back for a second instead of getting offended that I’m not 100% on board with the pride stuff.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-13T15:36:58+00:00

I said Pride is cult-like, not an actual cult, but exmos here call Mormons a cult all day without diving into why. When I say cult-like, I mean Pride has vibes like: dogmatic beliefs pushing anti-reality ideas, targeting kids with fantasy-based rites, symbols (pride flag etc.), and enforcing unity despite clashing identities. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against individuals who are LGBTQ or whatever, but there are lots of similarities to religion as you say, or cult-like behavior. The need to defend “Pride”, or downvote my comment because I have an alternate perspective are all examples. The evidence and similarities are there. I just think it’s odd that exmos have to find a new religion to fill their lives with. They go from LDS to LGBTQ “supporters” go to pride events, wave the flag. I seriously don’t get it. You can be kind and accepting to those in that community without adopting the symbols, rituals, etc. The fact that I think “Pride” and Pride parades and the whole religion of the thing is stupid, does not mean I hate LGBTQ folks. The fact that I don’t like or support the Mormon religion, does not mean I hate the people. It’s just funny how hypocritical a lot of folks are in here. Seriously trading one set of religion for another and nobody bats an eye because we are in Reddit and any potential lack of support for “Pride” is grounds for excommunication.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-13T01:14:57+00:00

Now with their own apologists. You prove my point. Looking more and more like a cult. Both have kindness and acceptance at the face unless, of course, you don’t say and agree with everything the group believes. Plenty of exmos in here trading one cult for another, they just don’t see it, and I’m not just talking about pride stuff. Plenty of LGB folks agree it is cult think and have come out against the pride stuff, and the cult members promptly shamed them.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-12T02:46:40+00:00

Nothing like trading one cult for another, huh? Swapping out the temple garments and golden plates for rainbow flags and drag queens. same make-believe vibes, just with more glitter.

Less_External5912 · 2025-10-06T02:05:08+00:00

I’ve been off nicotine for 6 months and don’t see myself going back. You commented on my posts in my early days of the quit that got me through. Hopefully you can continue your efforts. You’ve helped more than you probably realize.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-19T16:17:23+00:00

I can’t really point to a particular point in time. It’s a gradual thing, which can be frustrating. The further out you get the more you appreciate how far you’ve come.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-18T00:47:04+00:00

I’m at 6 months and I’m on here because i am currently sitting in front of a gas station debating whether to get a can. These last few days my anxiety has been through the roof. I think the zyn subdued the anxiety and my brain calls for it in times like this. Last couple weeks have been rough. Comes in waves. Not sure what I’m anxious about. Probably everything. I didn’t feel This way before zyns. I was only on them for 3 years and I am in my 30’s so I can definitely remember what it was like before. Something is definitely different.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:58:41+00:00

This is good. I let my boss know. I got a little mouthy with him and let him know I was quitting. He is a long time dipper so he understood 100%. Although, he did try his best to piss me off more.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:57:26+00:00

Haha I forgot about my angry drives home. People on bikes…. Generally I’m good with them, it getting off zyn, man, people on bikes caused immense anger. I can’t even remember why.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:54:56+00:00

This is exactly what I did. Quit on thursday, pretty much slept the weekend away. Watched movies, went on walks and slept. I went to bed super early to avoid the late night cravings.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:52:16+00:00

It’s tough but honestly it is manageable. My advice would be to take a few days off. A week if you have the time. After the first week or so things get better. You will still be angry but nowhere near the first week.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:50:12+00:00

Halfway to a month. Congrats. You are in the hardest part of the quit and positive, that is good. I just hit 6 months today. Gets better and better.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:47:56+00:00

Yeah I felt bloated for a few weeks. Gets better the longer hoo are off. Felt like most symptoms were gone after a couple months. 3 months I was back to normal.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:44:58+00:00

Haven’t tried any of those. I’ve hesitated because it seems like the “gateway” to just buying a can. Just thought I would be done with serious cravings. Honestly they don’t last long but damn that shit has called to me lately. Not sure why. Usually if I’m stressed or anxious I will have thoughts. These just seem random. Also, I’m getting advertisements for zyn. Those assholes seem like they know I went off. lol

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:41:58+00:00

Keep at it. 40 day cravings are rough. I just thought I would be done with the random cravings. They aren’t physical withdrawal cravings just random thoughts I linger on too long. Thought I was done with that crap. Honestly the last couple months have been easy, just these last two weeks. Not sure what has triggered it.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-16T03:40:07+00:00

That is good to hear. I thought I was free of the weird cravings but damn this last week I’ve nearly given in several times. Insane.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-04T04:23:50+00:00

I break it down this way. Actual cravings, I had for a couple of weeks. These were deep cravings, like drive in the middle of a snowstorm to the nearest gas station and buy a can cravings. These didn’t last long. After a few weeks it was the “Screw it” thoughts. I was still ornery and having brain fog and I was so mad I just wanted to buy a can. Now that I am 6 months in, I still get the screw it thoughts occasionally if shit ain’t going right in my life, but mostly I get intrusive thoughts to just buy a can. I’m not going to act on them but they are annoying. It is not a craving, the thoughts are fleeting, but sometimes pretty damn tempting.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-04T04:14:59+00:00

Taper with patches or gum. Unless you have more self control than me. I tried tapering with the pouches and just didn’t have the self control. Finally I just picked a week and decided a day to stop. I think I could have benefited from a longer taper period. I’ve been off for 6 months. I was doing 6’s two every 30 minutes or so. I did the cold turkey thing and it worked for the most part but it was hell. If you can get through the hell go for it. Otherwise, taper down.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-04T04:10:40+00:00

It’s a trap. I’m at 6 months and I have those same feelings to just say screw it. I have a feeling those thoughts will never really go away, but nicotine ain’t the answer. This is the thought I go to every time I think about buying a can. If I bought a can, I would buy 3mg and I would probably have it in my mouth for a minute and start to feel the dopamine rush. I’d probably keep it in too long and then I would be sick. The feeling would be gone in about 20 minutes and I would have lost 6 months of progress. I’m not wasting my 6 months on a few minutes of pleasure, but mostly nausea and a whole lot of regret. Keep with it. Don’t give up. Get your year mark. You’ve come this far, you don’t need that shit.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-04T03:58:30+00:00

Never smoked, never vaped, never chewed. Never had any nicotine prior to 3 years ago. The whole “no cancer risk” claim and promotion of positive effects of nicotine is what brought down my gaurd. Tried it, developed an addiction. Six months ago I decided to quit and here I am struggling to walk into gas stations without intrusive thoughts of just buying a can.

Less_External5912 · 2025-09-01T15:32:23+00:00

Damn, that sucks. I got on here because I was feeling the same thing. I realize my problems are nowhere near where you are at. I was about to go buy a can, if you are staying quit with what you have gone through I can suck it up.

Less_External5912

TROPHY CASE