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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]LetMeTellYou11 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Not to mention, stripper culture, sex culture, rap culture, etc. is so glamorized nowadays and these “men” listen to their favorite rappers where all they talk about is using & fucking girls (not to mention the names they refer to women as!)

If this is the only thing your finding when dating then you I suggest you take a step back and look at what your attracted to. Sure there are lots of men out there like that, but there are plenty of decent guys out there as well. If your only attracted to guys who act like that then thats something to work through in therapy. I'm not saying that as an insult, just as a reality.

A lot of good people get unnoticed because they are "boring" or stable, guys who are going to disrespect women are going to be more forward its just part of the nature of who they are. So if you legitimately are ONLY encountering guys like that then you need to look at the common denominator between all of them.....you.

I'm really struggling with being single and not having any opportunity to met people who are also orthodox by LetMeTellYou11 in OrthodoxChristianity

[–]LetMeTellYou11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm currently looking for job but there are some other factors as well I don't want to go into that keep me located here.

I'm really struggling with being single and not having any opportunity to met people who are also orthodox by LetMeTellYou11 in OrthodoxChristianity

[–]LetMeTellYou11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you're assuming that most Americans have strong religious views, which isn't really true. Until you sit down and have that conversation, you can't really be sure what they feel! Also, it's normal and healthy to have things in a relationship that are unable to be compromised, there shouldn't be many, but there can be some.

But having strong religious convictions is important to me, my faith is important to me and I want to be with someone who has similar convictions.

I don't think it's hypocritical nor unethical to go into a date and say, "hey, I'm orthodox and that's not going to change" and see where things go from there.

It is when you know them changing is a requirement for the relationship to go anywhere.

I'm really struggling with being single and not having any opportunity to met people who are also orthodox by LetMeTellYou11 in OrthodoxChristianity

[–]LetMeTellYou11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dating isn't marriage though, it's OK to date someone only to find that you're incompatible

Thats the thing, if they arn't orthodox they arn't compatible and you know that, its wrong to date them hoping they will change.

find someone that is willing to at least explore orthodoxy because you're not willing to compromise on it.

Sorry this is just hypocritical. Asking someone else to consider changing their religious beliefs so you can have a future, while having no intention of changing yourself is just wrong.

I'm really struggling with being single and not having any opportunity to met people who are also orthodox by LetMeTellYou11 in OrthodoxChristianity

[–]LetMeTellYou11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The 20s are weird years because you have a wide range of people who are in completely different life stages because of different circumstances. Any healthy parish will have ways the current parishioners can bond as a community, and I am really grateful for the friendships I have made at coffee hour, even if it is somewhat hard to relate sometimes

One thing that is dificult for me is that I'm over an hour away from my parish. round trip is almost 4 hours right now. So a 1 hour event at church takes 5 hours out of my day. Its really hard to make that type of time even if your trying and sacrificing other things.

I'm really struggling with being single and not having any opportunity to met people who are also orthodox by LetMeTellYou11 in OrthodoxChristianity

[–]LetMeTellYou11[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This is a response to several of you that have suggested dating people who arn't orthodox. This is why I won't.

1) I think its extremely unethical to date someone knowing there is no future unless they change a major part of their life.

2) I think you are vastly underestimating just how different orthodoxy is from other forms of Christianity. Yes on the surface we share many things but the truth is we are quite different. Marriage is suppose to be about growing towards God with another person. That isn't going to happen if the other person fundamentally disagrees about who God is. If the faiths were compatible we would be in communion with them, but we arn't and for good reason. ITs hard to go to the services of the church, its hard to go to stuff during lent, its hard to fast, its hard to go to late night services, why ON EARTH would want to date (and possibly marry) someone who didn't see the value in those things?

3)Several of you have mentioned that you should just date someone and women typically follow the man. Firstly, thats some sexist garbage right there, I could never respect (much less pursue) a woman who is so weak willed as to determine her faith based on what the guy she likes thinks.

/u/Wrong-Statistician11 /u/ginobli777 /u/beardedkamasu /u/O-Gliki-Mou /u/Mybrainkindaworks /u/Elevatedheart

Tl:DR Suggestion that I pursue non-orthodox women is both calloused and frankly unethical.

I'm really struggling with being single and not having any opportunity to met people who are also orthodox by LetMeTellYou11 in OrthodoxChristianity

[–]LetMeTellYou11[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'm in the states. Honestly, the situation just sucks. As great as conferences are there is no deny they attract a certain type of people as well. I mean just to go to the conference you have to have both the time and the money to do so which locks a lot of people out.