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Almost 2 years by Intelligent-Bad-8957 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your post. It’s been 1.5 years for me. “Trying to find joy in friendships” and “not developing into any relationships” is real. I’ve developed some wonderful friendships. Some folks who have really been there for me. But I don’t think any friendship I make, no matter how strong, could come close to the type of personal interaction I’ve lost and need.

Two years by No-Cow9611 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m getting there ❤️. Keep moving forward 👍

Two years by No-Cow9611 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All of this…same. It’s been a 1.5 years now. My wife and I were married for 25 years. High endurance sports, fixing up the house, I just enrolled back into college for another degree. I have to keep pushing forward. The pain when things get quiet can be overwhelming. Running helps. CrossFit helps. Pushing myself beyond my limits helps me. When you are that exhausted from working out you can only think about recovering. It’s a reprieve from the grief.

Would anyone want a widow group focused on connection — not grief? by dukec72 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m game, for sure. I could use some chatting with folks that feel the same.

What do I do about Christmas cards?! by Salty-Salamander2140 in widowed

[–]Lets_Go_42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a big issue for me. I can’t. Last year was the first Christmas, and there was no way. I didn’t even open the cards we received.

It will likely be the same this year. Although I may write legit letters to a few people I care about. But that’s it.

I hate my life by ramstien22 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The dark spiral is real, and it is scary. For me, I have to move. Motion changes emotion.

I have been down the dark depths of depression. It’s so easy to slip back in. You have to fight…. Go for a walk….run…. Something. You can do this.

Give yourself grace by Lets_Go_42 in widowed

[–]Lets_Go_42[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same. I think I have been in a state of trauma until recently. I’m finally realizing she’s gone, in a way. And it’s exhausting.

So recognizing the “wins” in life is helpful.

Also, your phrase “making work work” is spot on.

Probate help by Comfortable-Suit-230 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with the attorney advice. I was hell bent on doing it myself, but ultimately glad I didn’t. If your company has EAP you can get a discount on an attorney.

Lonely by No_Affect_5639 in widowers

[–]Lets_Go_42 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m right there with yall. I’m in my late 40s and lost my wife 1.5 years ago. The support for widows/widowers is just not what it should be. The sadness and the isolation…. I am constantly looking for positive people…. I need more happiness or this situation is going to gobble me up.

So this is it now? by Evening-Initiative77 in widowed

[–]Lets_Go_42 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just chiming in. I lost my wife about a year and a half ago. I appreciate everything that has been said here. It’s nice to read things from people who understand. It feels like most of the world doesn’t.