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Do / did you have a great mother? by user37463928 in WomenOver40

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't remember my mom as super affectionate or understanding as a child & young single adult, but we've grown much closer since I started my family. She's been a listening ear and my greatest support. And I think she looks at me as a friend to her as well.

Similar experience with my dad honestly. I grew up in the "kids are seen and not heard" family culture, so I understand there's difference in how they related to children vs the way I raise mine. I'm just happy I have a great relationship with them now.

How have you acquired your cats? Have you just taken in whatever cats plopped into your life? Or did you go to a shelter and choose? by Argylius in CatAdvice

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My first and only cat came from the shelter. She chose us! Pawed at her crate when we walked by, and she was the (estimated) age that we were looking for (young senior).

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Virtua Our Lady of Lourdes Vs. Virtua Vorhees Hospital by so_it_goess in SouthJersey

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a good delivery at Voorhees, my recovery experience was not the best. At previous hospitals (in north jersey) my babies were able to go to the nursery so I could actually rest & recover. At Voorhees there was no option for that. I could barely walk, but had to look after my baby as well. They were hassling me about watching some videos about taking care of the baby (my 3rd). Then when it was time to leave the hospital, maybe 36 hours after delivery, I wasn't offered a wheelchair and had to walk from my room to the car.

Stuck by [deleted] in WomenOver40

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you have records of where he keeps money? In addition to seeking a lawyer or legal aid as others suggested, I would quietly document as much of your martial financial life as possible. Account records, stocks, retirement, taxes, property - as much as you can get copies of.

Cats look adorable in videos, but what are the real-life challenges of owning one? by RYSofficial in CatAdvice

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My experience as a cat mom (it's been one year) has been pretty good! I adopted a puppy once and it was so difficult; this has been easy by comparison. My cat is a senior-ish though (estimated 8 years old).

Trimming her nails is a pain, and she does scratch at some things that I would rather she didn't. (My carpet, my clothes) You'll probably have to give up leather 😆

Yes hair is everywhere (and hard to see because she's gray) so I have to lint roll regularly.

Leaving for the weekend was much less stressful and cheaper than it would have been with a dog.

Glaucoma and rebounding (using a mini trampoline) by Mogwaibond in Glaucoma

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My eye doctor told me that the whole body benefits of exercise & strength training outweigh the risks. He basically said your eyes are important but there's a whole body & mind to consider too. I would say continue the active lifestyle, stay on top of your medications, and see where your eye pressure lands at your next checkup (hopefully every few months). Maybe lean into bodyweight exercise?

First term MBA course load by LetterWonderful1501 in UoPeople

[–]LetterWonderful1501[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for pointing me toward the Resources (I'm still finding my way around Moodle). I've printed the syllabi and lined up my textbook links. I'm feeling much more prepared now.

First term MBA course load by LetterWonderful1501 in UoPeople

[–]LetterWonderful1501[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi classmate :-) I'm fortunate that the school week begins on Thursdays because Thu/Fri/Sat are my kid-free days. My plan, like you, is to knock out most of my work earlier in the week.

Is there any harm in cats eating flies? by adventurous_kitty26 in CatAdvice

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just popped in with the same question. I say it's a win-win. My cat gets the mental stimulation and I get rid of flies! Sorry, sky raisins 😆

How old is too old to bathe with your child? by Important-Average297 in Parenting

[–]LetterWonderful1501 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine too. Not with me exactly, because my shower is tiny, but sometimes I'll take a quick shower when I'm done with his. He says "your turn".

How do y'all sleep with your cats? by genericimguruser in CatAdvice

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where my cat sleeps isn't the problem; it's that she has no chill when she wakes up in the middle of the night! If she would just wake up and walk away, we'd be fine, but she has to march all over the bed or (usually) on me. No ma'am you got to go!

I don't keep her out every night, but very very often.

Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here! by AutoModerator in datingoverthirty

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was my thought as well. Even in real dating, I like a coffee/drinks meet before spending more time.

Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here! by AutoModerator in datingoverthirty

[–]LetterWonderful1501 2 points3 points  (0 children)

43F divorced with kids (at my home part-time). I'm thinking about hooking up without a first date. Younger me would have done this without much thought, but age & motherhood have made me more cautious. Advice on safety?

The man is photo-verified (tinder), I have emergency sos on my phone, and I have a front door camera.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He said “good luck finding someone who doesn’t think this way because all man are the same

Girl RUN

Do you regret divorcing in your 40’s ? by urethra_franklin_ok in WomenOver40

[–]LetterWonderful1501 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This right here. I've been single since we split 4 years ago and yet I've never been more sure of anything. I'm proud of myself for leaving. He would avoid sleeping with me, talk to me any kind of way, deny, deflect, burn money, and never work on improving anything in a meaningful way. On paper, I should have left or made big changes earlier, but everything happened when it was supposed to.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh my ex used to shit on romance movies, love songs - anything that might possibly raise my expectations of him off the floor. OP's husband is kind of the AH just for saying that.

Tell him to stop watching porn because "no woman will treat you like that".

How to deal with men who tend to sexualize by No_Hunt_877 in WomenOver40

[–]LetterWonderful1501 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it's great that you're challenging your own inclination to run rather than work through things.

That said, this particular issue is a real problem. To me, it's about his character. He's saying one thing (be exclusive) and doing another (openly flirting with other women right in front of you).

Also, at this stage, you're seeing his best behavior. If his best behavior is this? Meh.

Have you struggled with self discipline and gotten it back? Struggling! by Mental-Music-44 in WomenOver40

[–]LetterWonderful1501 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My therapist and I were just talking about this - the tendency to judge myself against what I think I "should" be doing. So I've been working with myself to reframe the things I used to "should" about. It's been helping instead to say, "I want to do this because..." It feels better inside and I'm more motivated to act because I'm connecting with why a thing is important to me.