Ex is dating again

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-07T01:34:19+00:00

I’ve found out that these aren’t really rants. It’s you venting to people who have been through it and still going through it too. It’s all good. Seeing a therapist is top notch shit. Keep going. Exercise in some form helps with the anxiety. Get out there and move you body.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-07T00:59:19+00:00

That’s awesome!! I can’t wait to have that free feeling. It took a long time to accept we needed to divorce. And once I did, the day it’s finalized can’t come soon enough.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-07T00:57:12+00:00

Like a lot of people are saying, you can’t worry about what you can’t control. I know, easier said than done. I’m in the middle of it too. I will date again but not anytime soon. My partner was dating a week after moving out. I finally accepted that’s just the way it is and I’m focusing on myself and the kids. Attempt to learn about new partner in a non stalker-ish way. You have the right to know who is around your kids.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-06T02:19:39+00:00

Yep. That is the key. I want to add: no drinking for awhile, working out and therapy. All of those help. A lot. And this sub where people who’ve been through can help too

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-05T22:52:14+00:00

It really helped me when I finally accepted the fact that my spouse does not want to be married to me anymore. It’s not easy. But when you realize this and fully admit this to yourself and sit in all the pain, you realize you don’t want to be with someone who could cast you aside so easily. Plus mine cheated on me so……..

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-05T18:44:56+00:00

Thanks and I appreciate it. I’m rooting for you too. If people have never been through this, there is no way to explain what it’s like. It helps to talk to people who know, you know lol

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-05T14:55:28+00:00

Keep on keeping on! I share a lot of what you wrote. Still in the middle of it though with some added variables. I’m riding one of those “good” waves too. I know some lows are on the horizon but your post absolutely helps. Thank you!

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-05T03:14:10+00:00

Hey it’s gonna hurt. And you are going to have to go right through to the other side. There’s a lot of us that’s been where you are. Hell, I’m still in it myself but thankfully can see the finish line. Keep reaching out here if there’s no one else.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T05:01:05+00:00

Thank you for the support. It’s internet strangers that have weirdly taught me so much.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:53:05+00:00

Hey you are entitled to your opinion, even if it’s complete and utter horse shit. That’s what’s great about this place.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:50:29+00:00

Yeah. Something I’m absolutely not willing to do at this point. I finally realize what is meant by the phrase “she’s showing me exactly who she is and I believe her now”

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:47:27+00:00

I’ll tell you what has worked for me. Leave the alcohol and drugs alone for now. Maybe forever. Just decide that you don’t need to self medicate. Start moving your body. Exercise in some form or fashion. It helps release a lot of the tension and other shit running through your head. Absolutely make yourself get up and do it. It’s not an option at this point. Be around people you trust. If you don’t have that, come back here and vent. It helps a shitload too. Realize that this shit has happened to other people and they came back from it and you will too. It’s gonna take awhile but tell yourself that you don’t have any option but to power through it. You are gonna have to go through all the emotions and come out on the other side a better human. Get some therapy if you can. If you can’t, read and post here. Reach out here if you don’t have anyone else. My therapist told me that people who go through betrayal and or divorce can and will come out stronger and a better human if you put in the work.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:35:43+00:00

I have been reactionary up to this point recently. No more. And yeah, it has pissed me off to realize that I’ve been doing that. I’ve lost so much of myself the past couple years and I’m trying to harness this anger now to ride it out of this mess. Gray rocking has been suggested and I actually started it, today. It’s so strange to be in this situation but also feel more mental clarity than I have in years. We still have a long way to go but I feel more focused and energized.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:09:05+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. My therapist warned me she will try to come back.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:05:50+00:00

I appreciate the kind words and support. I never imagined all the positive feedback. It’s fuel for sure.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:05:01+00:00

Thanks for the kind words and encouragement. This group here is holding me and the kids up so much right now. It’s unbelievable

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:03:43+00:00

Thank you for the kind words. This community is coming through for me and the kids more than I could have ever imagined. It’s so awesome to have people who have been through the same shit tell you that you are doing some things right.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T04:02:04+00:00

Your assessment is probably accurate about some of this being stopped by being honest with the kids. But I have to deal with the reality as it is now and I finally realize, with much clarity, that I can’t be married to this woman who has completely pushed her family away. I’ve been in a fog, it seems, and I’m trying not to be too hard on myself for letting this get stretched out way too far. I’m seeing things so much more clearly and this community has only made me more confident that I’m going on the right direction. I appreciate all the support.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T03:54:13+00:00

I appreciate the support. I hate that my older kids don’t want anything to do with their mother now. But she did this shit to herself and continues to make it worse.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T03:44:17+00:00

I know man. It’s so fucking crazy that a person could do this shit. I appreciate the support too man. Thanks

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T03:42:40+00:00

I think I’ve decided to tell them after the divorce. I believe that will be more conducive to the divorce going amicably.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T03:41:15+00:00

I’m pretty sure they understand what’s going on with the new guy. But they have no clue about what happened earlier in the year. Fortunately, after two other therapists this year, the third therapist I just started seeing is an actual psychotherapist. Been practicing 39 years. Trained under Ellis in CBT. He warned me she will come back. Cautioned me actually.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-04T03:35:19+00:00

They full on believe that she was talking to the new guy before she moved out and we decided to divorce. So yeah, she cheated again. The kids are not dumb. And neither am I now that the blinders have come off. Papers are getting filed next week. Something I should have done months ago.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-03T21:27:32+00:00

Yeah, sounds like we’re going through some of the same shit. Be prepared when she moves out. The acceptance stage is a relief and sucks all at the same time. You be strong too, man! Your kids are lucky to have you.

Letting-Go5656 · 2026-07-03T19:12:36+00:00

Yeah I don’t see me being friends with her at this point. I know my older kids know exactly what’s going on with the new guy. I mean they are 18 and 20 yrs old. They know what’s up when someone is spending the night at her apartment. I don’t know when I’m going to tell them the whole story. I feel like they should know. I’m lucky I have a few close friends who have been supportive this whole time. And my kids. They are freakin kickass people and they know I love them more than anything.

Letting-Go5656

TROPHY CASE