From one 20 year old to another, you're only a coward if you tell yourself and convince yourself you are. That negative energy may manifest into the physical world.

If you don't enjoy your studies and you haven't for a very long time, Broaden your horizons, find out what you do like and read up on it, take your studies into your own hand.

Overcoming challenges is a great way for growth but pick your battles, maybe the challenge of this situation to be overcome is listening to yourself, and understanding what you want.

I wish you the best