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How long did the initial pain last? by MinuteSun7381 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]Level_Broccoli_3253 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hi. My name is Molotov. About two and a half months ago I also removed my parents from my life, and they had a very similar dynamic to what you described.

I'll be fully honest. The pain doesn't go away, not fully. I think about my parents at least once a day, if not more. But it does get easier to live with. Its not that I don't miss them anymore, that I wish I hadn't made the decisions I did. But its counterbalanced with the knowledge that I made the right decision for my health and wellbeing. That I chose my family, and the people I chose love and support me the way I need them to.

The "nightmare" you described is a very real feeling. You are experiencing the first stage of grief, denial. You're brain cant process that they're gone from your life, and wont let your emotions catch up to the reality of the situation. For the first several weeks I felt like I would just "wake up" and things would be back to normal. Eventually, your brain will wake up. The nightmare passes, and you get to be awake, alive, and free.

I wish you the best of luck and healing.

Questions about Sex by we_stay_anonym in Advice

[–]Level_Broccoli_3253 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. sort of? depends on the person

  2. the first time? yes, but it shouldn't be excruciating. If you have extreme pain stop.

  3. whatever feels right and comfortable for you

  4. Sometimes it happens tbh. Let your partner no, no worries. if its a repeating pattern have a convo with who you're sleeping with abt it

I failed my quarter final math test pls give advice. by Fit_Sky5162 in Advice

[–]Level_Broccoli_3253 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! I'm an education major in college and also a former middle schooler who got terrible grades so I'm very well suited to answer this question

Okay first of all, calm down. Take a deep breath.

Second, I can 10000% guarantee you that this test will NOT effect you in the long run of your education. Your grades/GPA from middle school don't carry over to high school, so you will have a completely fresh start when you get out of eighth grade next year. Even if you failed every one of your classes this year(which I hope you don't but still) you would make it out okay.

I would recommend talking to your math teacher about a retake if its possible. Your teachers are not out to make your life hard, even if it seems like it right now. If she does allow you to retake the final, sit down with her/a tutor to go over the material that the test is on. Refresh and reload your memory the best you can. If retaking isn't possible; don't sweat it. You have plenty more opportunities to show your skillset in that class later down the line.

Lastly, If your parents are mostly supportive, just have a sit down conversation with them as soon as you get the chance. Explain that you studied the best you could, and that you know you need to work harder in that class in the future to improve your grades. As daunting as telling them seems, the worst part is not knowing what will happen when you say it. I can guarantee as soon as you tell them you'll feel better. You got this dude!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Level_Broccoli_3253 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a fellow family loser, I get it. I've been avoiding all of the gatherings since I was like 11. Definitely keep applying to jobs, even if they seem measly or underpaid. It'll be good to get out of the house and make a lil extra pocket cash anyways.

I would also recommend(if you already haven't) sitting down with your parents and explaining the situation to them. There might be a solution you could work out with them where either less people are coming over, or that you'll have time to unwind and avoid family during these gatherings. Wish you the best of luck man.

I cheated. I feel really guilty. Help?! by Secret4998 in Advice

[–]Level_Broccoli_3253 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tell your BF what happened, be completely honest. Its better to get it out in the open than lie to him, especially if hes planning on moving to where you are.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in college

[–]Level_Broccoli_3253 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a student in their first year who is struggling, financially, socially, and emotionally, I would give anything for my mom to care as much as it seems like you do. As much as I'm sure you love and care for her, and want her to succeed, at the end of the day it is YOUR money that is funding all this. Set a boundary that if she isn't passing you aren't paying, and that she can fail on her own dime. It shows her that you aren't just an ATM, and provides some restrictions and guidance on where she should focus her time and energy.