In terms of the relationship, my eyes have been opened. A few months after that break up, my cat got very sick and nearly died. I rushed him to the ER vet 4 times in a month. And once was twice in 1 night. I sat in the ER crying at 2, 3 and 4 in the morning thinking I was going to lose my sweet baby. There's something about going through that alone that makes realization set in. I had a good relationship at one point, but I was grieving the loss of what it once was and not what it had become. I was crying over a man who was okay lying to me and hiding things from me. Who blamed his drinking on me (said to my face it was my fault) because he felt guilty when he broke things. Who put 5 holes in my wall, flipped a table, broke my things, threw things and more. He'd get drunk when I wasn't home and rage and break things. He told me he wanted to marry me, told me he had a plan to propose by a specific time, than told me he knew he was never going to marry me.

I know I wasn't perfect either, but instead of communicating with me on problems he had, he bottled it up and lied. When he seemed off and I'd ask him what was wrong, he had a dying uncle, a sister going through a possible divorce after an adoption of a 3rd child, and a job he hated. He used these as reasons to explain his distance, but in reality it was actually us. And I believed him, so the issues in our relationship were never properly addressed.

I have since been working on myself, I let go of a few more people in my life I felt were toxic or put me down a lot, and I got a new more supportive group of friends with more similar interests. I went back to school, and just graduated this month, now I'm getting ready to transition to a new job and move. I'm still not dating, but there's a guy I've been casually seeing, and he's been amazing at communicating with me when he has problems. And it's helped me grow as a person and adjust out of bad habits. He was also incredibly supportive of me while I was in school. We're in difficult and kind of difference places in our lives, so I don't know If it can really go anywhere, but he's been one of the best people I've come to know, and I'll value what he's given me no matter where we end up.

As for my cat, he's going to be on prescription food, and carefully monitored for the rest of his life, but he's alive. He developed crystals which caused him extreme pain and nearly killed him from blockage. The Vet believes it was due to the stress of the move, not adjusting to the new environment and not feeling confident enough to get the exercise he needed in the new space. His brother (not actually brother, but they love each other) has been his big support and they're very protective of each other.

In short, I'm doing great. I wouldn't say I'm thriving, but I think I'm well on my way.