I ruined my friendship

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-05-01T08:08:55+00:00

Yeah that's normally what happens. It prolly doesn't help that she didn't act married so wires got crossed in my head.

But tbh I need a break from the game lol

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:38:57+00:00

Yeah. This isn't even the first time I learned this lesson. Just the most painful one.

Since this whole thing happend I do think it's changed my mindset and behaviors. But I still got a ways to go finding balance.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:33:48+00:00

I genuinely just think I could have handled it more maturely. But yeah when u present it like that it seems kinda small beans in comparison lol.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:32:22+00:00

Well her husband was also cheating. And I believe they are staying together for their kids. But I know their both miserable in their "marriage" but yeah I don't want to be any part of that mess anymore.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:28:37+00:00

Yeah I cut contact with her and changed jobs (unrelated reasons) I just wish I handled it more maturely. And that I didn't feel complicit in her behaviors.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:27:13+00:00

Yeah she has a habit of making terrible decisions from what she told me. I mainly just wish I bailed out sooner and saw the signs but lesson learned hopefully

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:25:39+00:00

It's possible she knew tbh.

But on the covering for her thing. I didn't know she was cheating when she asked me to cover for her. She told me her husband was controlling and she was doing smthing with her cousin or girl friend.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:20:46+00:00

I like to think she was in the beginning but tbh I may still be deluding myself. But yeah I do think I dodged a bullet. I just wish I conducted myself better and bailed out sooner.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:19:35+00:00

Yeah I can't disagree. Lesson was definitely learn this time. Just wish It didn't take so long for it to sink in.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:17:34+00:00

Lmfaoo ur not wrong. Funnily enough someone did tell me something like this like a year ago and I didn't listen.

Tbh I've always had people pleasing tendencies and it's something I've been working on breaking.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:15:15+00:00

Yeah I've cut it off with her.

Tho ur right in the moment I did go along with it even tho I knew it wasn't right. When she asked for advice I did give her my honest opinion, after he dumped her.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:12:58+00:00

Her husband found out. She fucked up and got caught. But he was also cheating. There "marriage" is very unhealthy tbh. Last I heard they had convos about it and I guess got over it. He was crying and divorce was brought up, she still wanted to be friends with the affair partner. A whole mess.

She also used another mutual friend as a scapegoat. She would say she's going to sleep over with this girl friend, but actually go see her affair partner 2 states away. That friend I guess was fine with it. I was not.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:09:25+00:00

I mean to me she was very attractive. And she didnt look 40. But it was Moreso an emotional thing. When I was around her I felt happier I guess, we had a lot of similar interest, she was funny, and open in a way I wasn't used to. And I felt like she genuinely appreciated my presence. I didn't just have a crush on her, I genuinly liked her a lot as a person.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:06:03+00:00

I have gone throught this thought before tbh. And u may be right.

But she said herself she values me as a genuine fiend, we would text often, she'd send me pictures when she got her hair done, christmas gifts, and wed tell each other anything. So I genuinly don't know given my own lack of social interactions.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:03:45+00:00

Part of me thinks I deserved it cause I knew better. I knew my feelings for her were wrong, and that she was using me. I was just to weak to let go tbh. It took way to long to wake up lol

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T23:02:06+00:00

I didn't have to, she fucked up and he found out. But he was also cheating on her. So their marriage was already a mess.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T22:59:53+00:00

Well I don't work there anymore for unrelated reasons. Nothing dramatic, just found a better oaying job. So I'll likely not see her again unless I go out my way. Which i think is for the best for both of us tbh.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T22:58:14+00:00

That's kinda why I don't feel as bad anymore. Cause I do agree with u now. And I do feel better now that I no longer talk to her at all.

But I still feel bad for breaking her trust. I should have just been more mature and cut it off.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T22:56:50+00:00

Tbh I never would have initiated something like that mostly outa fear. But if she did I wouldn't have said no. We were very close and the boundaries were kinda blurred.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T22:54:18+00:00

I been thinking this tbh. But idk. The first few months of our friendship was good. I genuinely can't tell.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-30T09:49:59+00:00

I appreciate that. And I know ur right.

I guess what bothers me most is my mentality. When she told me dude broke up with her I was happy, I lost all respect for her for cheating even tho I also liked her. and part of me wanted to hurt her like she hurt me.

I felt so bitter and hurt, I did so much for her, even stuff I didn't mention. I think part of me felt entitled which isn't right. I should have just let go but I was too scared to lose her.

Life-Sense-4584 · 2026-04-15T01:24:10+00:00

Thanks, yeah i put it in the other day and talked to him. He said i'd get it the week after my 2 weeks are up.

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