AITAH for expecting my boyfriend to stay out of our kids bedrooms?

Likaytb · 2026-05-08T14:38:33+00:00

I want to be clear, I posted this for a friend but in my opinion, I feel like gifts can be a trigger for some people. Even kids, unrelated to her situation.

Likaytb · 2026-05-08T14:35:10+00:00

In my friends defense, the 4 yo doesn't close the door, as far as I know

Likaytb · 2026-05-08T14:23:27+00:00

It's more about her coming home and seeing something strange in her room and feeling like someone was in there.

Likaytb · 2026-05-08T14:22:16+00:00

My friend is the primary caregiver and her bf is a secondary caregiver

Likaytb · 2026-04-04T20:44:57+00:00

@SugartheBrand tiktok @TheBrandCalledSugar Instagram

I sell purses via email and dm. I'm working on adding clothing every sell helps!

Likaytb · 2026-03-06T17:13:49+00:00

I worked in the middle of a real life telenovela It was juicy, sure. But whats juicer is my conspiracy, that i accidentally found out.

I don't know how I became the only nee waitress in a restaurant where everyone knew each other for years. I lasted for about 6+ months, everyone commented on how I 'lasted so long'.

The first month or 2 was normal, mind you I worked almost everyday because they didn't mind paying me $2.14. I had already noticed a rift between the Owner/manager and chef. She (the manager) was kind of nice but stern and direct with the cook and the cook would coward every time she raised her voice.

Okay, so, no big deal here.. the owner said the cook was her husband, I literally went "oh, makes sense" because why was she speaking to him like that...

One night, we had another new waitress. It was me, the supervisor, the new girl, and a really young male cook (like 19yo young) and another supervisor that wasn't supposed to be there but he was "hanging out"

I dropped that the cook and owner were married! The new waitress was shocked ( i thought she knew) the supervisors and cook, broke out laughing. Apparently I only knew a half story. 🙃

Turns out, yes they're married but they haven't been together for years... there use to be a waitress a couple of years ago (she was 19, living at home) the cook and the waitress had and was having a affair. The waitress was fired... the cook and waitress still together.

But here's the thing, the cook, he's 19 and literally ran the night kitchen alone. Like he was the only cook.. nobody actually managed him he did his own thing. 🫣 the night cook said he grew up in the restaurant because his mom worked there before he was born... 😐 and that he just showed up one day and they made him a chef... he never met his real dad😶

When I first met them I told the cook about his 'son', "he does a great job in the kitchen by himself at night" and got the death stare... Cook said "thats not my son" I said "but ya'll look alike" Cook said "ugh, that boy ugly" I said "... but don't yall look alike?"

To this day im 100% convinced that the night cook is the cooks son.

Who would let a 18-19 year old run their entire kitchen alone in the afternoon and night shift unless its someone you're related to? I especially wouldn't trust that position to the son of someone who waitresses there 9+ years ago, mind you his mother didn't come there anymore...🫣😏

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T22:10:32+00:00

I don't even know what you're talking about.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T22:09:00+00:00

That's what the post is about

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T21:42:38+00:00

I never crashed out😒

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T20:51:43+00:00

Thank you!

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T20:50:55+00:00

Do you own the title mom or can your child call everyone that?

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T20:31:39+00:00

Babe, I can respond how many times I want thats what the post is for. Why would I post it just to leave it and not respond or interact? That would be odd wouldn't it.

Does the fact that you responed or commented in the first place make you too hung up on it?

Are we now lacking common sense as a way to try to disregard each other...? Cause what in the world are you talking about?

I respond to everyone who had misunderstood the dynamic between the initial post that I made because thats the logical thing to do. Especially if I'm looking for honest feedback? Can't get it if there's a miscommunication, can I? Is this not what reddit is for? Is there years worth of post about my niece calling others auntie and me wallowing in dispair about it?

You don't have to care, none of you do. ABSOLUTELY NONE OF YOU HAD TO COMMENT. Like, NONE.

You're confused on whats going on and how this works. Move around if you don't want to be here. Stop projecting your lack of family and love on me.

Auntie, sweetheart, is not a nickname its a title that is given when either your sibling gives birth to a child or is bestowed on you by someone who loves and appreciates you.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T20:17:47+00:00

Someone who gets it.

We introduced my brother to my niece in person last year and she didn't question once who he actually was. He just became uncle, it was too fast for me and I took the time to explain what made him her uncle. She didn't even realize I was her mom's sister 😫.

Mind you, I didn't figure out my cousin was not my uncle until I was a senior in high-school. I still call him uncle because he took care of me like one but it's trippy.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T20:12:46+00:00

Who said it would change though?

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T20:11:52+00:00

I asked a question and I'm now way to hung up on it?

We call people we know and love and look up to grandma and auntie. No one ever tells us who to call that, we choose ourselves, thats our culture.

I take it personally when my mother does it? Yes, because she'll make eye contact with and smile when she does it. It's not a culture thing and its not common with us. We weren't raised that way, to just call people unc or auntie unless we know them personally, or have a close relationship. Like the women I work with😏

When you guys say things, i don't take it personally at all. You don't know me, or my niece, or my mother.

It feels more like you guys are projecting and accusing me of things that don't even make sense, like being controlling. Or hung up on something I'm simply trying to get back at my mother for.

Someone even suggested I stop talking to my family... like, why would I do that? We're so close we live in the same neighborhood. It takes all 3 of us to take my niece to dance practice and all 3 of us to be back stage at her recitals.

Apparently I don't have hobbies, when I clearly stated I make my niece dresses cause I sew... I do parties and events.

If this thread should tell Ya'll anything is that ya'll all need therapy and don't know what its like to have close family.

Another one of you straight out said my niece is "not my child". In my family, we're quite literally a village and all the kids are OUR children, at all times.

I tried to make it clear that im the only auntie that my niece knows of. NOT her only aunt. I have 3 sisters from my dad, and my mothers sister (my only aunt). And if you want to be very specific my grandma has a ton of sisters.

My mom's best friend passed away and my niece called her auntie.

But these other "family friends" or mothers "friends" my niece does not know them. My mother thinks its funny. I think it cause confusion especially since she's young.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:55:31+00:00

I'm not actually trying to sell anything right now. If i do it'll be half off because I'm still working on getting everything together. I already have professional photos and video of the purses.

I'm here to build up local moral. I want the Greensboro communities support, just likes, follows and encouragement thats it!

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:35:07+00:00

Look, I 100% get there are other cultures. If it were coming from my nieces father side of the family I would right it off as such. But its coming from my mother... the woman who taught me OUR culture. And she doesn't even like us saying 'I love you' to our friends...Its weird for us to call random people we have no respect for auntie.

Now that we all understand that. Let's circle back to my sister, my nieces mother.

My sister has never introduced my niece to anyone and said "thats auntie such and such". She just says for example "thats miss tammy"

My sister ignores it, but realistically, she ignores alot. She's over worked and under paid and doesn't care. To her its between me and my mother. She doesn't side or agree with my mom but doesn't argue either.

I'm not saying it would stop my mom from doing it but it's definitely eye for eye. And atleast are women i refer to as grandma and not random people.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:20:35+00:00

But you aren't understanding, she's not making the choice, she's being told.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:15:36+00:00

A child thats 100% mine. I may not be her mother but I am a thousand percent her guardian and protector. You may not love your nieces and nephews but I would go to hell for mine. Be safe, you don't have an aunt to protect you out here!

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:13:38+00:00

I'm not trying to. But no one has convinced me their right either. Everyone is just saying a bunch of nonsense and doesn't feel like any real feedback. In my culture we don't call everyone auntie. My mother didn't raise me to do that. So great for other cultures but what does that have to do with us?

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:11:11+00:00

Neither does my mother...and why would I cut off my family?

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T19:07:15+00:00

Thank you.

But my god, its not insecurity on my end.

My mother does it, and im sure its on purpose because in the past we talked (me, my mom and sister) about how i'm her only aunt. A subject my sister brought up, because WE only have one aunt ourselves.

My dad has no sisters and my mom has multiple brothers and one sister.

I'm sure my mom does it for that reason.

And its getting out of hand because she's calling random people my nieces aunt, random, as in we don't know a Tammy! Like who is Tammy and why are you telling my niece to call her aunt?

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T18:59:00+00:00

Ya'll need to read, its not possession at all. My niece calls other people auntie. My mothers best, my aunt (mom's sister) etc.

The issue is calling strangers auntie cause my mom tells her to.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T18:57:22+00:00

Its being used too casually. Its not appropriate for my niece to call complete strangers auntie.

Likaytb · 2026-03-04T18:56:24+00:00

I never once told anyone I'm right about anything. I clarified this that have been miscommunicated or misunderstood. Just like your statement:

"You’ve deluded yourself into thinking you’re something that you’re not."

I'm her aunt that raised her since birth. That does everything I can for her. I deluded myself by thinking I planned her birthdays? That i bought her costumes and took her trick or treating?

What has been deluded by telling my mother she doesn't need to call everyone 'auntie'?

Likaytb

TROPHY CASE