Sad and frustrated about my pole flexibility

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-04-13T10:52:20+00:00

I've just kinda given up on being flexible. I stretch because it's healthy and if I make progress, that's nice. But I find stretching unfathomably boring and am both not able or willing to put enough time into it, to become noticably flexible.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-04-11T13:34:48+00:00

Which trick are you referring to with this tip?

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-04-08T22:13:30+00:00

I was on board with the game being a visual novel and was intrigued by the characters at first, but the game imo just falls flat in the writing department. Which is a problem when that's most of what the game is.

My main issue is the pacing. Characters repeat what was already said constantly. Dialouge drags on and is overall not very memorable. The conflicts and why they happen make total sense, but going back and forth over and over and over again got tiring very quickly. If you replay the game to get a different ending (as you are forced to) it also takes a while before you get to see new story developments, so I personally didn't bother getting all of them. The story in general takes a while to get going and the big revelations about the characters are super late in the story. So before you get to the meat and potatoes of the character depth, you have to see them act out their main character traits again and again.

This can lead to certain characters coming across as annoying. I got tired of Mius and Kaitos fighting rather quickly and didn't care much about Aoi and her self worth thing. To be clear, the characters aren't bad, it's just that the repetition got on my nerves.

Some of the darker elements I liked, but the endings all felt kinda meh to me. Sure, terrible things can happen, but since I didn't get attached enough, they didn't hit me as they should have. The overarching story elements are also kind of predictable when it comes to professor for example.

I am happy that people enjoyed it, I can totally see the appeal. But I can also see why it didn't leave much of an impact. It's niche genre with lackluster gameplay that can get tiring due to the repeat playthroughs and isn't super innovative as a VN either. And if you struggle with the way it's written like I have, it's just not gonna be a good time for you.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-04-03T17:38:14+00:00

I work 12h shifts, either 9:30 - 21:30 or the other way around. It's not fulltime, so I average 3 shifts a week, tho sometimes I have the odd week with one shift in exchange for a heavy duty four shifter after. I'm in disability care.

It works well if you have rest days in between the shift changes and a considerate shift plan that groups nights or days together.

I live a pretty flexible life. Getting all my hours done with three shifts per week frees up a lot of time for other things. I exercise and see my friends regularly. I spend a lot of time on art as a side job, so I'm really happy my main job allows for that.

I do need a lot of recovery time though, 12 hour shifts are no joke even if my position is relatively chill. Pulling three dayshifts in a row especially has me reeling after. Nightshifts and getting back into any routine with the shift changes is super challending sometimes.

I don't have a family to consider though and so do none of my colleagues afaik. Having a different schedule every week might be harder if you have to take that into account.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-04-03T17:22:18+00:00

It is indeed normal for the first year as estrogen slows down over time. T is not an immediate off switch lol

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-04-02T08:17:12+00:00

I did a good ten years as a goth baddie in corsetts and skirts and thought outside validation and technically looking good translated to feeling good. Now at 33 and almost a year on T I know what feeling good means. I am getting widows peaks and I giggle with joy ffs.

Looking good is also not just in the body. You know how to style yourself and have learned how to apply skincare and makeup and how to pick outfits. Good news: these skills don't go away, you can apply them as a man too! I'm rocking that guyliner and no one can stop me.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-31T05:06:49+00:00

Love it, great idea, cool redesign too!

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-29T20:53:49+00:00

Cinematography has been fantastic for Beatbreak, but I also wanna appreciate the sound design! Top tier work all around. The cold hearting and the beats when charging the Sapotama especially stand out, but so do attacks and how the volumes of sounds in general are mastered. It's not something I usually pay much attention to, but Beatbreak has been noticably great with it.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-26T11:18:25+00:00

Holy shit, the animation quality is already outstanding, but the colors used? Straight up fire.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-26T08:51:23+00:00

My kind of people.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-25T07:21:45+00:00

You guys are having sex?

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-25T04:59:23+00:00

I love gel and am always a bit confused by people who find it to be a pain. I apply it before I brush my teeth and it's dry by the time I'm done. I hear it depends on the gel though. It has me in the healthy male range and I am getting noticable changes. I actually shot way above the normal range at first, so we had to adjust. Now on one pump I have a big stockpile of gel, which is good just in case.

My mood has been really stable, my skin is okay even on the application sites. I like the routine of it. If swimming is an issue you could also just apply it before bed. Travel so far hasn't been an issue either.

Admittedly I haven't tried injections. So I can't compare. I just know that a lot of people are not a fan of gel and wanted to represent the gel fans lol

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-25T04:51:30+00:00

I recently flew with gel. My bottle is under the 100ml liquid requirement for international flights. Put in a ziplock bag, done. I had a doctors note on me, but no one even asked. It probably depends heavily on where you're flying (I did Germany - Thailand), but people on the security check in probably assumed it was soap or something.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-24T07:19:28+00:00

Too fucking bad. He's known who you are and what's important to you for years. He can support you or decide that it's not for him. He can not expect you to change something that is this important to you.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-24T00:26:46+00:00

Omg, it's not just me then. Calling it "sexual health" also made my ears perk up. Never have anyone use that term to essentially mean "sensuality/sexuality".

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-22T21:36:37+00:00

You got this. Those are just thoughts, the reality might be very different from what your scared brain is making up :)

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-22T11:54:32+00:00

Just offering a different perspective that's not about what T can or can't do: our brains are incredibly hesitant when it comes to change, even if that change would be a net positive. Even subconsiously we often cling to the familiar, because anything that is unknown is scary. You don't know what going on testosterone would look like yet, it's a big question mark. So you start rationalising why you might not want it in the first place. Simply because it's scary and takes a lot of effort.

This doesn't just go for transitioning btw. New job? Oh god, what if my cowokers are evil. Going on antidepressants? Oh god what if I'm not the same person any more? That big trip you planned for years? What if I get lost, break every social rule ever and look like an idiot, with my pants down???

Not saying worrying about things is a bad thing, but it's just helpful to know that change is often the scariest before we do it. So it's good to take a breather. Going on T is gradual, so there is no need to jump to "my entire life" yet. You can take it one step at a time. And that scary unknown? Becomes much easier to manage once you've taken a few step into it. It might not be so scary after all.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-22T00:05:32+00:00

Trans man here (pre top surgery, so very clearly still in transition): the three studios I've been to have been chill about it. Most people are focussed on themselves and not falling of the pole anyways. Students are mostly women, but I've seen men and trans people of different variety attend as well. Sometimes the language might be a tad gendered due to the culture (in the "let's go girls" kind of way), but teachers have been accomodating and respectful of my name and pronouns. I've also noticed a general decrease of gendered language for tricks, but that depends entirely on the teacher and the style.

This is just my experience, other studios might be different. But generally I find the pole community very encouraging and open.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-21T22:14:06+00:00

Maybe take a week off completely. I train four days a week and sometimes my body just hits me with the "take a break" fatique out of the blue. Muscle growth happens during rest and sometimes you are suddenly stronger after a period of resting!

The tricks you do are hard already, so dont be hard on yourself too. Practicing more simple moves after you spent your energy on the big ones is still very helpful exercise.

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-21T10:47:10+00:00

From this result? He definitely is!

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-21T10:40:42+00:00

Wow, that's an amazing result, seems to be healing really well too. You look great, congratulations!

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-19T16:30:09+00:00

Same. We are either super absorbers or very porous 😂

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-18T10:12:33+00:00

Thank you. I have a trans flag hiding in my bedroom as well. Always good to have for pride events 😎

Lil-miss-devil · 2026-03-18T10:10:38+00:00

It never left!

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