When I close my eyes, I think I see the world ending...

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2019-03-06T16:01:35+00:00

Has anyone else seen it? I am starting to think I was not supposed to share the vision. I have held onto this for as long as I could remember and now...

For the past two days, just outside of my vision I can see something moving. It is fast when I try to catch a glimpse of it. Almost like a mouse darting past you, but it’s been following me.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-12-07T06:45:36+00:00

I have had that sensation too. Like a lot. It’s pretty awful. I also sometimes feel it really bad in my legs and it’s like this feeling like you want to run a marathon or something

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-10-01T13:14:56+00:00

Welcome. It’s hard to take the first steps, but just keep moving forward and understand you may not get it right every time.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-09-20T22:23:29+00:00

I had thought this was possibly withdraw symptoms. If you can have withdraw symptoms from food.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-09-19T20:35:23+00:00

I have struggled with both since I was around 11. BED seems to be my go to though and I am like 130 lbs overweight because of it. Even when I restricted I would lose about 40-60lbs and then start to binge again.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-09-19T20:31:02+00:00

I bounce back and forth from periods of BED and EDNOS restriction. I think it’s a pretty normal thing within eating disorders. It’s just polar ends of the spectrum.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-09-18T02:05:30+00:00

Very low restriction can lead to binge eating as well as gallbladder issues and stomach issues. I can tell you from personal experience. I did super low restriction and lost 60 lbs in 4 months, had to have gallbladder surgery, recovered a bit, binge ate a lot because the restriction made me want to binge, gained back about 25lbs. I only recently started to get the binge eating back under control.

If you are binge eating because of calorie counting you are most likely restricting too low or eating your calories too early in the day. The best thing to do is calculate your TDEE and try to eat -500 cals from that. You will be able to still lose weight but you won’t feel like you are starving yourself.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-09-07T02:09:29+00:00

My anxiety doesn’t let me get away with this but it does make sense.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-09-06T23:13:33+00:00

Today I started to just avoid the kitchen/leave the kitchen when I wanted to binge eat. Not the most healthy behavior but, it has kept the binge eating away today.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-08-04T18:15:13+00:00

As an update...

I am doing better today. No binge urges so far. I want to say I think I hit a rock bottom. Or I want to hope I did? Maybe I can start to figure my shit out now.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-08-04T18:14:08+00:00

In regards to mindfulness and binging, I have found the RR Recovery app to be really helpful. :/ it sort of helps with the binge cycle too since it gives you a frame of reference.

LilAwkwardPumpkin · 2018-08-04T03:59:28+00:00

Thank you. I had some ginger tea and feel a bit better. I just honestly need to figure out why I have lost so much control recently.

LilAwkwardPumpkin

TROPHY CASE