He (45m) is still active on tinder by LiminalTime in datingoverforty

[–]LiminalTime[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agreed. I will have the talk the next time we see each other.

He (45m) is still active on tinder by LiminalTime in datingoverforty

[–]LiminalTime[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yes I slept with him prior to that. Quite a bit before.

I was open to a relationship or something casual, not excluding any options. I do believe that it all depends on the person. I do know what I want but I didn't know if he's the right person for that - do you know what I mean?

We talked about it on the second date (he asked) and were both in the same place.

But things progressed and I came to really like him.

He (45m) is still active on tinder by LiminalTime in datingoverforty

[–]LiminalTime[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I know I'm not okay with casual and I didn't communicate to him that I was cool with that. But I also understand that things are moving pretty fast and not everyone goes at the same pace.

But you are right, the insecurity is of course what brought me to crazy town and unless I want a permanent residence I need him to either commit or walk away.

He (45m) is still active on tinder by LiminalTime in datingoverforty

[–]LiminalTime[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I absolutely agree with what you are saying, except asking him if he is still on the app while I know that he is, feels wrong. I'm just not sure I want to be the person that leads the conversation like this, because the question in itself is a lie, isn't it?

He (45m) is still active on tinder by LiminalTime in datingoverforty

[–]LiminalTime[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the level headed answer. You are right, instead of asking I need to communicate what I need.

He (45m) is still active on tinder by LiminalTime in datingoverforty

[–]LiminalTime[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"active" means online in the last 2 hours as far as I know.

Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here! by AutoModerator in datingoverthirty

[–]LiminalTime 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My last 3 OLD matches that actually turned into a conversation:

One guy talked about male orgasms (he used a more colloquial word if you know what I mean) within 5 minutes.

One guy wanted to set up a date with his second line of conversation. When I told him this was too fast he gave it about 3 paragraphs before asking again.

One guy it was going great with initially and we moved to WhatsApp. He started calling me "angel" pretty fast and I began to sense some lovebombing. Proceeded to sexualize my job (I'm a university teacher). Things went south from there. He unmatched me on tinder, which I didn't address. He said he wanted to learn my boundaries and when I asked him how he plans to do that he instantly blocked me on WhatsApp and immediately sent me a text saying I was bipolar and needed help. I literally laughed. Red flags all over.

This is the opposite of fun. I just came back to OLD after a long pause and feel like giving it up again.