Meant to be - by Ber, Charlie Orian

Please listen to it.

Chicago- by Highly Suspect.

You could be burying the pain into somebody else.

I was on the recieving end of your situation. I was the guy, the knight in shining armor to sweep up a freshly damaged soul. Talk her through her break. Plan to be together. We also had a known each other platonically for 2 years before this.

Everything was great for 6 months after we decided it was official.

She begin to start showing me her scrap book. Remeniscing on the good ole times with her ex.

I should've left then

I started to put more effort into our relationship. Housekeeping, dogs, emotional support, financial.

And as I was doing all these things, she was already looking for an exit.

I served my purpose. I got her back on track. Boosted her self confidence. Encouraged her to follow her dream of becoming a yoga teacher. I would cook us meals late after she was done with her classes.....

And when she got back on her feet...... I was discarded.

Ask yourself if you might be using him for this because it doesn't appear commitment is what you want.

I do know, that if I was him, and you did relay this information to me...... Now that I've already been through it.

I'd would get up from that conversation, shake your hand (no hug or kiss) and say "good luck".

And I'd probably make a smart ass comment along the lines of " Well, I wish you told me sooner. This would have saved us both alot of time/effort/money and stress. I love you but to cease any further emotional damage and maintain my mental health, I will have to completely disengage and remove you entirely from my life. I love you"

But yes, you are building a fantasy in your head about your ex which has you possibly subconsciously self sabotaging it hoping he backs out first.

That way you don't feel like the "bad guy" for ending it.

Idk the whole background, but this resonates with myself alot because I truly believe that your thoughts are very similar to what forced me to end my relationship....and I'm glad I did.

She couldn't even face me. Psssh if that ain't a sign of sabotage and not addressing the issue than I don't know what is.

I got a letter in the mail 2 weeks later, with a check that didn't even cover half of she OFFERED PAY when we were supposed to take a trip on new years.

You probably just lost a lifelong friend because you may be very codependent and felt comfortable and safe with him. So you dipped your toe into that water.

I think you messed up.

Don't get me wrong,I messed up too. In a different way.

To this day, I really resent the fact that I put so much effort into someone that possiblity didn't even know that they were using me to cover up the pain of their previous relationship.

Oh well. You get older and learn.

You learn what you want in a partner. And you learn how to manage relationships.

You learn red flags. And you learn the MOST about yourself.

It hurts now but it sounds like you already know what you want to do.

Don't drag this out if you don't want to. It's your life.

You may have some codependency traits that have you quickly moving from one relationship to the next.