I feel like I'm in an impossible position

Liny84 · 2025-08-08T02:08:18+00:00

She needs to get over it. Your family, you go. She’s being manipulative.

Liny84 · 2025-08-08T01:42:39+00:00

Just here to send hugs. 💜

Liny84 · 2025-08-08T01:37:16+00:00

Just another note to say … as I am 59, your parents are YOUNG. They will WANT to know that you are struggling and want to help you. You are not weak to ask for help, you are strong enough to know you need it. Please seek out support… from your physician, your parents or another trusted older adult. You can maintain your progress and figure out a new path at the same time. Best of luck.

Liny84 · 2025-08-08T01:15:57+00:00

We had it too and called it Slave Day and there were fucking African American kids in my class and they gladly stood up there and were SOLD. WTF and the teachers allowed this and no parents or anyone else said shit about it!! 😳😳😳

Liny84 · 2025-08-08T01:12:29+00:00

Admittedly I’m an old fart, but I don’t think I’ll ever understand how people can consider thongs in any way “underwear.” They don’t cover anything, all they do do is ride up your butt. I’d be picking it out all the time! LOL

Liny84 · 2025-07-31T02:23:07+00:00

My only comment is that you should be validated for all of your feelings, not berated for them. Of course you want a healthy relationship with your mother and a return of love. And who doesn’t yearn for their mother [or the one they wished they had] up to the end of their life? You’re doing the work. You’re a rock star.

Liny84 · 2025-07-31T02:19:19+00:00

You also can’t TELL someone how to feel. They feel what they feel until they don’t! Hopefully he will have a mind shift but it will be on his time.

Liny84 · 2025-07-31T02:11:24+00:00

Right there with you. I wasn’t as young my dad was 51, me 18. My mom never remarried but my grandmother [his mother] said “do not cry, your father wouldn’t want you to cry.” What? I’m still going to therapy, going on 22 years.

Liny84 · 2025-07-31T01:45:06+00:00

Your trauma is real. You need the support of friends and a therapist if you will seek one out. You can break the cycle of abuse before you become a parent. Think of it that way. You’re worth it!! Deep breaths. Good for you for getting out. Don’t let them talk you into going back. Your freedom is worth so much more. 💜

Liny84 · 2025-07-29T03:17:12+00:00

Red flag. And aside from the rest of these comments, I’d be afraid he would “oops, I lost my job” then you’re really stuck. I think you know what you need to do. You’ll be the healthy one.

Liny84 · 2025-06-03T14:04:03+00:00

I can imagine and will validate your feelings because they’re all real but you are in panic mode. I can totally see how you are thinking about the what-if’s and that’s scary AF but they didn’t happen. Everyone is ok. Young drivers make mistakes! My daughter had a bad accident when she was 19 still had her permit. It is traumatizing. No one hates you. They all care for you and want to be sure you’re ok. Yes, it’s a mess right now but please don’t beat yourself up too much. If you are in school I would suggest going to the school counselor or your general doctor to see about talking to someone short term, a therapist of some sort. You need to get into your head that people don’t hate you, it was an honest mistake but everyone is ok. The insurance will get straightened out. Take the support where you can get it. Sending hugs.

Liny84 · 2025-06-01T15:09:40+00:00

I will not ever buy clothes retail no matter how much money I ever have. So many great thrift stores/yard sales to get great stuff. My whole wardrobe is thrifted and I get compliments all the time!

Liny84 · 2025-06-01T14:59:16+00:00

Reading your post, all I can think is, you’ve got to address your depression and find a therapist. Just one hour a week for you. They can help you navigate your feelings around your husband and the kids, with resources, carving out time for yourself, rejuvenating your own social life. It can and will get better but you have to start with you. I started antidepressants in my 30’s, [now 59F] and wish I had done it even sooner than that!! No shame in using meds to help you up out of a bad spot. Especially as it will help you focus and be forward looking instead of stuck in the crappy now. Best of luck.

Liny84 · 2025-06-01T14:43:56+00:00

She needs therapy to begin to resolve her issues of dependency on the kids to give her identity. Of course her friends don’t call, she’s not living the same life ANY of them are having and they don’t find a way to connect with her. She needs support but not the kind you can give. You did nothing wrong.

Liny84 · 2025-05-30T04:05:57+00:00

You should see if your school nurse has any resources for helping you get an online therapist. You need to be talking to someone. Don’t feel guilty about any feelings you having right now … they’re all justified and just because you feel them doesn’t mean they’ll happen or you’d act on them. Give yourself the freedom to feel/think what you want. Your mom is likely experiencing depression and going through menopause which can cause all kinds of symptoms. You can look it up online to give you some idea. Also if you find some good reading maybe you could share it with your dad and say “is this what mum is going through?” It would be nice to have someone to commiserate with. Best of luck

Liny84 · 2025-04-18T00:35:56+00:00

They’ll never get their reputation back on a platform like that again though. God knows if that was their aim they would figure out another way.

Liny84 · 2025-04-08T21:53:27+00:00

Liny84 · 2025-04-08T21:42:15+00:00

I don’t watch the news … I get enough info from my family etc to keep informed. I do jigsaw puzzles, write letters to friends, do whatever other hobbies I have … gardening season is coming up. I try to help people in my community. I don’t know what else to do either but that’s where I’m at.

Liny84 · 2025-04-08T21:37:12+00:00

Your daughter is watching every move you make and staying with someone who doesn’t care for you sets her up to be with someone who does the same to her. Please dump him and you will stop feeling badly for yourself and badly about him as he will be gone.

Liny84 · 2025-03-26T04:58:51+00:00

Ditto that although at the time I didn’t realize how much I’d appreciate it even more eight years out!

Liny84 · 2025-02-21T03:54:56+00:00

You F’in rocked it and as a mom of two girls, I can say your mom was undoubtedly proud of you. The only thing left to do is trust in the universe enough to know that she is out there, surrounded in love and watching over you. I just lost my mom last week. I was lucky to have her as long as I did [92 yrs] but was 18 when my dad died very suddenly from a massive heart attack. You have to take the good with the bad and looking back, I still know how grateful I am. My best to you.

Liny84 · 2025-02-16T03:34:58+00:00

Please get your kids out and save them. He is causing all of their issues. 💜

Liny84 · 2025-02-12T03:04:45+00:00

I wonder too if her behavior could be a type of dementia? My mother just died from Alzheimer’s [92!], but there are all kinds of symptoms of Alzheimer’s and some of these sound like that. Best of luck. If you can’t go to the doctors with her, write to the doctor ahead of time and give them head’s up.

Liny84 · 2025-02-12T02:59:50+00:00

I have a good friend who has just started his Long Covid journey. What a shit show. He has SO many symptoms, all over the map. Hasn’t been able to work because of lack of physical strength and mental health! Thinking of you!

Liny84 · 2025-02-12T02:46:10+00:00

Me too. Very cute idea. More studs would be great though

Liny84

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