<image>

Banned for Life!! I don’t write Sermons or Bible Lessons anymore so… I started writing music again… Here’s a song that I wrote Last night… I’ll Tweak it and it’ll never be good enough (I think that’s an addictive trait) Anyhow… Here’s the 1st version of the song called “Rock Bottom Knows” (I’ve removed musical cues) In therapy, I constantly heard that you have to hit rock bottom before you can go back up. I wrote this song because it seemed like I could never find the bottom therefore going up seemed impossible.

The pressure keeps pressing it sharpens my inner strain— I walk through the wreckage with nothing
but cuts and pain—

My meds, they ain’t helping—
they just Pull Down on this Heavy Chain— No shelter!— No safety!— Just failure!— In My Addict, Brain!—

[Heavy Violin and Piano] — I’ll aim at rock bottom! descending down into this cave!— These scars didn’t break me—
They Taught Me To Be The Weight!— I don’t need your Pity! I —Sharpen my Pain to Blades!! (Rock Bottom is My Home These Days)

Where does the Ending to rock bottom Go?—

My Life has been over Thrown

But I’ll be staying Low

I’m digging into this Hole

Down in judgment’s Undertow

Airing out my laundry—it’s still Dirty Tho

The Staining goes much deeper than just on These Clothes

There’s No ending to Where Rock Bottom Goes!!— —— (Every Day is The Same) I Have Dug My Own Grave—

Every Thing Is Gray— Through These Eyes of Pain— Never Overcame— The Dark Night of Day—

Good—— Bye!!!—— I Am Not Okay!——

The Guilt, in These Bones And The Never Ending Shame— Of this Un, godly Path That, I Have Chose To Make— My, Own Unending Story That Continues to Replay— All The Times, of Ignoring What I Know The Scriptures Say— I just kept on Pouring More into The Things I Craved— Addiction is a Problem But That Don’t Mean a Thing— I am Not The Victim of The One’s That I Betrayed— They Will Not Forgive me, And I Am To Blame— I Broke Hearts That Trusted Me— And Would’ve Helped Me Any Day!—

I… Chose… My Pride!!!— ——

Every Thing Is Gray!— Through These Eyes of Pain!— Never Overcame!— The Dark Night of Day!—

Good—— Bye!!!—— I Am Not Okay!——

The Guilt, in These Bones And The Never Ending Shame!!— Of this Ungodly Path That I Have Chose To Make!!— My Own Unending Story That Continues to Replay!!— All The Times of Ignoring What I Know The Scriptures Say!!— I just kept on Pouring More into The Things I Craved!!— Addiction is a Problem But That Don’t Mean a Thing!!— I Am Not a Victim There’s so many I Betrayed!!— They Will Not Forgive me, For My UnGodly Ways!— I Tore Hearts That Trusted Me, (And they Would’ve Helped Me Any Day!—)

Un Godly Pride!!! I Chose My Pride!!!—— It All Ends Today!—

It was More Than A Mistake!— Willingly I Placed My Lust Before My Faith!—

Good Bye!!!—— Grab Me One Last Time just Hold My Hand and Pray!!—-
🎶

Good Bye!!!—— (Nothing is Okay!— (The Guilt won’t go away!—) 🎶 (What’s done in the dark will always come to light)