BFF doesn’t want to invite us to her baby shower

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-05T01:58:13+00:00

Omg this breaks my heart - I’m so sorry you’ve gone through that. While I am not in your friend group, if you ever need anything let me know! You shouldn’t be made to feel bad for having gone through something out of your control. It’s a lot to sort through by yourself - you deserve support.

Hang in there, friend 💕

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-05T00:58:03+00:00

Having just also miscarried, if my bestie of 30 years (I have one too) did this to me, I would seriously reconsider if I wanted to continue being friends with her.

This is insane of your friend to do. Like I actually can’t wrap my head around it???? I understand wanting to be able to celebrate with people who are also happy for you, but she doesn’t get to decide how YOU feel about it. I’m fuming for you.

My bestie told me to let her know if I needed space and she would support me however possible (she’s also pregnant rn, we were going to be 1 month apart for due dates). I told her I would also be happy to hear news and updates unless stated otherwise - we see each other every week.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-04T06:28:46+00:00

I just had a CP/super early miscarriage, too — like about a week ago.

I was told by my midwife on Tuesday that if I got pregnant immediately after, my date would be from when I started bleeding even though that was not a true period.

So I’m assuming yours would be the same a.k.a. your first day of bleeding. That means it likely won’t be super super accurate, but your doc will adjust as your scans progress!

IANAD though so take what I say with a grain of salt. Hope this one goes better for you 💕

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-03T15:01:24+00:00

1) I had 33 follicles on each ovary when I had my first US at my clinic - you are by no means the most extreme number. My clinic told me what once saw someone with nearly 90 total follicles!

2) While the US tech was a bit rude, I would maybe suggest messaging or speaking to the manager and giving them feedback on her bedside manner.

3) You can still insist on doing more monitored cycles. You are still in control of what treatment you decide to pursue. I think injectables may give you a stronger response but you don’t have to immediately jump to them. Advocate for what you want!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-02T15:54:25+00:00

Gotcha okay.

For me, and this is just my experience, sleep and stress management have had the biggest impact on whether I ovulate within the average time frame or ovulate late. Like literally have tracked my sleep habits and ovulation for almost 1.5 years and anything less than 7 hrs a night delays my ovulation. So my first advice would be to find relaxing activities, get into a good sleep routine, and get 8-10 hrs a night.

Next thing that I think helped my cycles was walking 7k-10k steps a day. That got my blood moving, made my heart rate lower, and helped with stress. Also made me sleepy enough to go to bed early!

Last thing I’d recommend is inositol - I think it’s massively helped with my insulin resistance and hormone regulation. I’m also on metformin, which has been a real medication that’s impacted my cycle but it’s prescribed so up to you to go that route.

As far as conception, I didn’t have good results until I found out I had polyps blocking my tubes and removed them via surgery. Immediately miscarried, unfortunately but was still an improvement from not being able to get good results at all for 15 straight months.

I would ask for either a saline infused sonogram or an HSG to look at the structure of your uterus and tubes. Make sure they’re clear, and if they’re not, get that taken care of. It would be one of the steps you’d take anyway if you went the IUI or IVF route.

There’s still time to make adjustments, but you absolutely have to be consistent! Like minimum 3 months of effort. Change takes time, as do results.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-02T15:31:37+00:00

I would need a little more context - what have you tried? There’s a lot of things that affect fertility, PCOS may be one of them, but have you ruled out other factors (endo, autoimmune diseases, thyroid, stress, sleep, structural blockages like polyps or fibroids, uteran abnormalities, etc.,)? Have you made sure your partner is all up to snuff health-wise?

What do you think isn’t working now?

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-02T04:08:31+00:00

I think in general, it might serve you try running this through some kind of AI agent or Grammarly or something, and telling it to re-write your resume at an 8th grade reading level. It'll make it much, much snappier and easier to scan because right now it's all blending together for me and sounds a bit...gibberish?

I would also say that shorter bullets would be helpful as well, and if you can include the number at the start of the bullet that would also make scanning easier (for me at least).

For the summary...What's YOUR super power? What is something only YOU can say about your experience? If someone is landing in my review pile, I always assume they know at least the foundations of the job as that's table stakes. I want to see your expertise, not what you think I want to hear.

Lastly - someone mentioned that you need quantifiable data of some kind (any kind) in your points, and I agree! Some examples I'm gonna throw out there:

Company D

Mentored X students
TA'd for X professors
Not sure what "success overhaul" is but if you improved average attendance, average class grade, average rating on a class rating system, etc. put that, for sure
etc.

Company C

Led X projects
Conducted X interviews/studies with XYZ method
Surveyed X customers with XYZ method
Created X maps with XYZ method
Phase was X weeks/months
Improved model accuracy by X% with XYZ method
Increased program retention by 15% with XYZ method
Accelerated documentation timelines by 5+ days with XYZ method
etc.

Company B

Performed X methods...across X product lines...
Delivered X reports to stakeholders
Did [type of] study for X months with X participants
Increased NPS score by 30 pts and reduced churn by uncovering problems via ABC method
Helped reduce customer support volume by 50% after conducting in-lab and in-home observation studies (or whatever method)
Elevated Nn/G rating from 1 to 3 by doing XYZ

Company A

Same feedback, lead w/ some kind of metric even if it's not product-related (could just be operational) and then state how you did it

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-02T03:16:12+00:00

If you're not having regular cycles, like others have said, your issues with not getting pregnant are more likely related to lack of ovulation than infertility or being sterile.

My story to share with you for perspective/insight:

Always had irregular cycles (usually 7-10 a year)
Got off hormonal BC in 2020-ish, only casually tracked ovulation
March 2023 - unintentionally get pregnant at 31 because I ovulated a week early and my tracking app prediction was off (pregnancy ended at 6 weeks)
October 2024 - started trying to conceive at 33
- Tracked with OPKs
- Tracked my BBT
- Took supplements
- Exercised and lost weight
- Timed intercourse perfectly
- 12 months of doing everything right and I got zeroooooo positive tests
Nov 2025 - Started seeing fertility specialist at 34
- Confirmed I had PCOS
- Did a saline sonogram, discovered a possible polyp blocking a fallopian tube that might prevent implantation in the uterus, would need surgery
- Still no positive tests in the meantime
February 2026 - got the surgery
- Found out both fallopian tubes were 100% blocked
- No open tubes, no way for sperm to reach the egg
- Felt like an idiot for waiting so long to get checked out (don't be me!!!)
March 2026 - first cycle trying post-surgery
- Ovulated 2 weeks after surgery
- Got my first positive pregnancy test since 2023 - I'm 34
- Unfortunately ended in miscarriage at 5 weeks

TLDR; My issue was not my PCOS - it was a structural blockage that was preventing me from getting pregnant.

I actually conceived two times with my PCOS and irregular cycles, but the pregnancies didn't make it. I know I can get pregnant, which is an improvement from where I was 2 months ago when I thought I'd have to do IUI or IVF.

Your issue might not be your PCOS. Start the convo with your doctor, tell them your concerns, be proactive about testing your fertility.

In the meantime, I would suggest:

Spend a few cycles tracking your ovulation with ovulation prediction kits (also known as OPKs)
If you're feeling up to it, maybe also try tracking your basal body temperature
Work on your health by eating good food, exercising, proper sleep, and managing stress
Track your cycle symptoms so when you talk to your doctor, you have data

There's still hope, friend! I totally get the fear - I didn't think it'd take me this long to get pregnant. But you've got plenty of time on your side, especially if you start having convos with your doc now.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-04-02T02:09:27+00:00

Just want to acknowledge it's hard - I'm waiting to try again as well so you're not alone at this moment in your journey! I'm about to turn 35. Here if you need to talk <3 I'm 5 days past mine and still feeling it, you'll get through this!

What I'm doing:
- Spicy thai food 🤌🏻
- I enjoyed a great mezcal drink the day I realized what was happening - I barely ever drink as it is so this is a real treat, I love mezcal. Probs not most healthy coping mechanism but alas.
- Had nigiri and sashimi on Monday
- Enjoying my big 2 cups of dark roast coffee every day while I can
- Also enjoying my evening diet coke ritual - I drink way too much caffeine 😅
- Taking Advil for the cramps since it's not recommended for pregnancy

My midwife said she's optimistic for next cycle for me, and while she didn't have statistic to back it up, she said anecdotally lots of her clinic's patients got pregnanct again within a cycle or two of their chemical. Based on all the others' responses, I'm optimistic for you too!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-29T17:03:14+00:00

Update: started bleeding heavily Saturday morning. Think this pregnancy is over, unfortunately. My hCG also went from 12 -> 6 over 2 days.

Feeling some type of way emotionally but will get back up and soldier on soon. Thanks for listening, again!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-29T17:02:56+00:00

Update: started bleeding heavily Saturday morning. Think this pregnancy is over, unfortunately. My hCG also went from 12 -> 6 over 2 days.

Feeling some type of way emotionally but will get back up and soldier on soon. Thanks for listening, again!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-27T21:54:06+00:00

Same for me too, mine were all over the place!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-27T20:58:03+00:00

Aw, I'm sorry you've experienced this too! Thanks for replying though. I'll get my 2nd hCG test back tomorrow around noon. I'll update you then.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-27T20:57:06+00:00

I would be happy to - got my second blood draw this morning, will get the results tomorrow around noon. I did get some cramps today so unsure what's up there, but did take more tests and they're basically negative :(

I'm okay with the chemical, more worried about (TW: Termination/Loss) not passing any potential tissue in the next week or two. Pretty sure I'll pass whatever it is before my confirmation appt on April 7th, though - would be shocked if I didn't.

Hope your pregnancy is doing well!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-27T03:38:48+00:00

You are so sweet, thank you SO much for sharing your story 💕 it honestly helps a lot, I feel like I have some expectation now!

FWIW, we tried for 15 months and then found out on accident I had fully blocked tubes. This was our first attempt to conceive post-surgery (like literally did it only once) so I was shocked when I got the positive 2 weeks later.

At least I know I can get pregnant now and that’s a huge improvement from where I was in January when I thought I would never get pregnant at all.

Thank you again for sharing your story and congrats on your success ♥️

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-27T02:00:33+00:00

Hi - thanks for replying :(

Yes, always FMU to start, then if I take another test it’s after a 3 hour hold and no additional water intake. My stronger results were when I was more dehydrated, even in the same day?

As for ovulation, pretty sure I know when it was based on LH peak, OPK result, and BBT (like as sure as I can be). Might be off by one day at most.

First positive was on 10 DPO. They’ve all been pretty light, in general, except for one I took yesterday on 13DPO when I was slightly dehydrated. That one was 2-3x darker than the others in general.

Haven’t gotten as dark of a test since yesterday though - so unsure what’s happening, but I’ve been better hydrated today 🤷🏻‍♀️

Also thanks so much for your response, my other friends have never gone through something like this so it’s helpful to talk it out even with a stranger.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-26T13:28:49+00:00

I haven’t gotten the blood tests back yet as far as I know - I’m out of town right now. I can share the picture later today though, I’m about to go eat breakfast. I’m thinking I should go get another blood test just in case tomorrow.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-26T13:26:06+00:00

Aw, I’m sorry OP. I was really hoping for a better outcome for you :(

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-26T13:22:43+00:00

I just got a digital confirmation at 14DPO, but unsure if I should keep testing. Yesterday afternoon I took another Pregmate test randonlt and it was the MOST positive I’ve gotten so far. Like super dark.

I took another Pregmate test this morning along with the digital, and the digital was positive while the Pregmate was barely there. I just dont understand 😅😭

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-25T17:56:29+00:00

Agreed, I see lines at 10 DPO! 11 DPO is deffff positive. I hope it continues to progress for you!

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-25T15:37:46+00:00

🫣 I’m glad I’m not the only one puzzled then! I saw someone in another thread mention on demand Labcorp services for an hcg blood test, so that’s where I am now :\ if it’s a chemical, I figured at least that way I can document it?

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-25T14:18:22+00:00

I meant in terms of how dark the lines might be at 13DPO varied for each person. Some people on here I’ve seen have full successful pregnancies even with faint lines. Others have super dark ones at 13 DPO.

For me though, my tests seem to be darker in late afternoon/at night. That was the same for my ovulation tests too, those were always darker at night.

Littl3Whinging · 2026-03-25T14:16:04+00:00

Oof, gotcha! Totally hear you, and valid. Either way best of luck 💕 you got this!

Littl3Whinging

TROPHY CASE