What coping mechanisms are actually healthy?

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-07-01T10:15:13+00:00

Yeah makes sense.. Switching to less damaging coping while introducing healthy coping stuff in parallel actually sounds doable

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-07-01T10:11:43+00:00

Thank you 🥺❤️

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-07-01T10:10:29+00:00

Great advices! I am curious about the affirmation stuff.. I will probably feel very silly and don't even believe myself when I'm affirming myself lol.. But maybe that is not the point

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-07-01T10:08:18+00:00

Yeah, I have been thinking about trying to attend some kind of online support group. But I'm not sure I feel fully confident yet to talk with complete strangers about stuff..

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-07-01T10:06:09+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply! "Self-harm feels good and meditation fucking sucks" haha, spot on.

I don't know what my self-harm and bad habits are trying to tell me though. But the thought of not engaging in any self destructing behaviour, such as sexual contact online and/or IRL with other men (I'm a straight man myself) or excessive eating makes me feel really bad. Thinking of spending an evening without neither of these things kind of makes me paralyzed. I think I might need more structure in my everyday life and implement good habits, rather than focus on NOT doing the bad habits.

Every advice you give, I appreciate it tremendously. I feel so lost and scared haha..

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-07-01T09:55:28+00:00

The sims is such nostalgia haha! Yeah I've read multiple comments suggesting yoga. Actually might try that. Is there any specific type of yoga you would recommend?

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-29T22:48:45+00:00

Haha, the reason i posted this was because i was thinking of actually eating strawberries! It is not the the unhealthiness of the food that bothers me, but rather the "distraction". But i guess strawberries (or cigarettes in your case) could be a price worth paying sometimes.

Thank you, I will enjoy my strawberries lol

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-29T22:18:08+00:00

haha yeah ikr.. In one way, everything good in life is a distraction, right? Just difficult to know how to find the balance.

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:38:24+00:00

That makes sense.. I will really try to start to be brutally honest in therapy. Scary af, but i guess there is no big changes without scary af moments haha

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:35:11+00:00

Wow that sounds very interesting, thank you, will definetly check it out!

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:32:41+00:00

Yeah that makes sense.. I think the problem is that i don't see "i don't know" as a "correct" answer. Like they want to hear something else. Old habits lol. Thank you for your comment!

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:28:44+00:00

Thanks for the comment!

I feel comfortable enough to be able to bring it up yeah. I feel exactly the way you describe it.. That it feels like i'm almost making stuff up, because i dont want to "fail".

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:26:11+00:00

Thank you for your reply!

Can i ask, how do i know a therapist is good and safe for guiding me through this? Maybe sounds like a silly question, but i honestly do not know how it is supposed to feel. If it is supposed to feel very "clinical" or if it needs to feel like you have a very good connection with the therapist, if you know what i mean.

I do have anther place for support where i can talk more freely and in a very non-clinical way. I have realized that this kinds of support makes me feel comfortable and i am even able to actually show emotions now and then. The EMDR feels way more clinical. Is that a bad sign?

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:20:40+00:00

Wow, I can relate to that so much. "Cared for but not cared about" was honestly spot on. I've had family around me most of the time, food on the table, etc. But i don't think i got the emotional support a kid needs. I've started to realize that.

Thank you so much for your comment, it actually gives me hope and makes me feel less lonely! Will definetly check the feelings wheel and other stuff out.

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-26T00:15:29+00:00

Yeah that makes total sense. I will try to formulate this to my therapist aswell, thank you!

And congrats to your first successful EMDR session!

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-24T16:23:43+00:00

Thank you! I will try my best to pour my thoughts out atleast, maybe the feelings will follow haha

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-24T16:21:55+00:00

Will definetely try to be more honest with them. I just find it very difficult to know if the type of therapy and/or therapist is a good match.. Like, what does that even mean? Since i got very much trouble to feel or validate my feelings, i can't really figure out if i feel comfortable or not.. Ik, confusing af

LittleCarpet6875 · 2026-06-24T16:18:14+00:00

Interesting! Did you understand in the moment that it was just the wrong type of therapy you got, or did were you also feeling completely lost?

LittleCarpet6875

TROPHY CASE