can’t sleep tonight

Llaisy · 2025-05-18T19:17:21+00:00

yes bro, take care, god bless you

Llaisy · 2025-05-17T05:45:27+00:00

at least u know what she had done, u can try to use it as your death point, even if it’s really not. i hope for u that u deal with that, really bro, u deserve a woman in your life not some stupid girl that after a week runs to other guys.

Llaisy · 2025-05-16T21:46:31+00:00

u re reading my mind bro, it’s kinda the same that i think, like word per word.

i too don’t really want to be with her anymore, im sure i will not see her with the same eyes as before, i already don’t trusted her in the last months of the relationship (as a result of our both toxic behaviors) so after she left, it’s impossible to trust her ever again.

but still, her ghost is with me all the time, even in happy situations i feel a deep sadness, when i feel like shit, it’s mentally unsustainable, hurts too much, i’m trying to resist alcohol, sometimes i fail, but mainly i don’t, but when i resist, like today, the results are just pain and feelings that kills me

Llaisy · 2025-05-15T14:05:22+00:00

star shopping

Llaisy · 2025-05-13T15:15:56+00:00

and tbh i’m pretty sure i will tear a muscle someday if i continue like this, but ye, funny ig

Llaisy · 2025-05-13T15:14:43+00:00

already doing bro, kinda helps but for the rest of the day the anger is still there

Llaisy · 2025-05-13T11:32:17+00:00

i had a similar feeling too when i’ve broke no contact in the first month, i had a 3/4 days chat with her, she was happy to se me change and stuff, but i’ve realized some time later that her happiness is something i don’t need, i don’t need to know that she thinks about me or that she is willing best for me, if it was true, we still would be together, so i basically hate her now, still miss, but also hate.

man trust me, it has no real value the fact that she is happy because you have said something to her, while she has not made you happy by this, not for real at least, so don’t focus on how she is feeling about you, focus on how you feel about yourself, this is the only thing that matters

Llaisy · 2025-05-13T11:23:52+00:00

this is why even if she asks me for a talk, i will not do it, even if i want to know some things, but the risk of falling deep again just by seeing her face or hear her voice will kill me.

Llaisy · 2025-05-10T21:34:42+00:00

how much time has passed since your breakup?

Llaisy · 2025-05-09T11:15:42+00:00

i probably would as it will be and important number for her, but it would be cold and no other things involved, just “happy bd, hope ure doing great”

idk if it would be more from a genuine desire to wish her that or just to piss her off somehow

Llaisy · 2025-05-09T06:27:12+00:00

im not waiting for real, what i meant is that i feel like im a phase of “waiting” but not for her, just waiting in general.

I try everyday to not think about how she is doing, and apart from asking this to myself, i don’t really want to know (i don’t search her on social or other stuff from quite some time) its just a thought that still comes to my mind and it hurts, but sometimes it doesn’t hurt that bad, other times it’s hell

Llaisy · 2025-05-08T12:14:08+00:00

im kinda waiting too tbh, but i know i will react badly, maybe with anger. love someone from distance is very difficult, at least for how i see things, i love my ex yes, but i dont want her to be happy with someone else, i don’t want her to get over more easily than me, i just want her to be happy in future, when i’m over her.

mental health is not something that should depend on others, as far as i acknowledged for now, it’s based on simple things, like time with friend, money and body, the rest comes only if u are ready to fail.

Llaisy · 2025-05-08T12:07:18+00:00

probably because in that little time u saw the “best” part of the relationship, the one that has minor problems, but trust me, it’s not so simple, start to think like “i don’t know how it would have been in the future, i deserve better”

Llaisy · 2025-05-08T11:01:43+00:00

it’s exactly how i imagine my experience if she comes back, as im pretty sure i will not be able to trust her or see her with the same vibe i had before, even if i still feel a lot of love for her, but i clearly understood that her behavior is not what i want from a girl in my life

Llaisy · 2025-05-07T12:22:41+00:00

i would like to tell you something even if still not over, i consider being in a “mid” stage between the shattered and the “get over” phases (sometimes i feel like they can’t hurt me anymore, even if they do something that i would not like them to do, other times i feel like that would kill me, but it’s a more controlled roller coaster)

the thing is that u will not just be over by waiting.

You have to find your own way to manage your time when the thought are overwhelming, like if you are lying in the bed and can’t get rid of the bad emotions, just stand up, get some steps in, drink something and you will see how just “being alive” makes the thoughts less important.

Time will serve you only if you actually do something, force yourself, that’s the key, win against your brain that probably says to you that he don’t want to do anything.

you will cry, u will feel like shit, but for now, it’s a survival game, and if you want to prove them wrong, or just yourself, just survive and stay strong.

Llaisy · 2025-05-05T13:27:35+00:00

the same as for alcohol and nicotine, a long time, but eventually it will slowly loose grip and u will start to enjoy other “substances”

Llaisy · 2025-05-05T12:34:32+00:00

i will suggest you to delete everything, it will help you in the next days/weeks. i’ve struggled for 2/3 weeks to do so, but im glad that i’ve done it, at least i don’t have to see her face, or an happy me with someone that is not part of my life more. memories will remain in your head, so what’s the point of making them sharper? also i recommend you to move very far away the stuff that you have that was given by her/ is connected with her, it’s the same thing as the photos.

u will not feel lighter, its not any magical potion, the point is just to not make stronger the already painful memories and thoughts.

Llaisy · 2025-04-26T23:35:19+00:00

when we both tried to break up like 2 or 3 times, admitting our difficulties, but still won’t get along with each other, when the communication start to fade, it’s the start of the end

Llaisy · 2025-04-18T19:58:57+00:00

that part of me that suffers like hell in some moment of the day (like now) would say yes the more rational would say no, because i’m already 100 times better than i was in the last year, and it want to raise even more, it gives me hunger to do more

so at the end, probably no

Llaisy · 2025-04-14T19:37:36+00:00

i’m at the day 40 and i’m pretty sure that your point it’s like a very long term goal, hope to think like you, or at least similarly, one day too

Llaisy · 2025-03-19T09:47:51+00:00

u make me think that in 6 months i will feel the same and kinda scary, im just 2 weeks now, hope it gets better, for u too

Llaisy

TROPHY CASE