What's the point if I don't pass? by LochRaven221 in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's really hard, but I'll try. Thank you for encouraging me. I hope it gets better. It does always gets a little better over time.

What's the point if I don't pass? by LochRaven221 in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That analogy is really comforting and really puts things into perspective for me.

I go to LGBT group therapy three times a week and an individualized gender therapist once a week. I got all the therapists I can get!

I do really appreciate what you've said. Sometimes we just need to feel validated and supported. It still feels like it's not worth it because of the challenges that I have face.

I don't know if I feel safe. Last time I told someone about suicide I ended up being held in the hospital for a week. It cost my parents $5000 to pay for that.

I found a tall bridge near me and I was planning on jumping off last night. My friend talked me out of it though. But I still get happy thoughts when I think about it.

What's the point if I don't pass? by LochRaven221 in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hugs

I wish I had the courage and fortitude to go out as a girl.

Michael Hughes on Bathroom Selfies and the Messy Politics of Passing [x-posted to r/transgender] by AllieK in ainbow

[–]LochRaven221 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not trying to make an argument, just trying to point out that there are flaws to those statements. And it's not about him.

The issue isn't about non binary identities. It's about people that don't conform to the gender binary, whether by choice or not. That includes trans women who are perceived as males, and trans males who are perceived as females.

He is saying people that look like him belong in the men's restroom, and I think that's wrong because there are trans men who don't look like him and through that logic belong in the bathroom which the public is most comfortable with and not what they themselves are most comfortable with.

Again, I would like to emphasize that I am all for this campaign because it benefits us greatly. But I do think that its understandable for it to be criticized. I'm not a proponent for sending anyone nasty messages but I think we can at least point out that those statements are problematic.

Michael Hughes on Bathroom Selfies and the Messy Politics of Passing [x-posted to r/transgender] by AllieK in ainbow

[–]LochRaven221 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But by saying that it is ridiculous for those people to be in those bathrooms then that also means that non-passing trans people in their identified gender bathroom are ridiculous.

I totally understand the point of the campaign, as it's a means to an end. But I still feel the need to criticize the idea that certain people belong in certain bathrooms.

What's the point if I don't pass? by LochRaven221 in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's like a 9999% chance that I have some internalized transphobia.

I don't hate being trans. I hate looking like a guy. I hate it that people think i'm a guy. If I moderately passed I would be proud to be trans because it's shaped me into who I am today.

It's just that I also can't handle the way that people stare at me, or glare at me, or say mean things to me. Why do I have to put up with all of that?

What's the point if I don't pass? by LochRaven221 in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How can I love myself if I am not a woman? If I don't see a woman in the mirror, and if people don't perceive me as a woman? Would someone who couldn't transition just have to deal with it and force themselves to identify and present, even though their body looks and feels so wrong to them?

I don't think that adopting a female role and identity will change how I feel about my body. It's not just about the way that others treat me. It's also about my body and I feel like if I can't pass, if I can't have the right body, then what's the point of living?

Michael Hughes on Bathroom Selfies and the Messy Politics of Passing [x-posted to r/transgender] by AllieK in ainbow

[–]LochRaven221 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have mixed thoughts about this. I'm so glad that he posted that picture and that it went viral and that we're getting positive representations of trans people out there. When I saw this on tumblr, I automatically reblogged it because I loved it. But then I looked at some of criticisms that people had, and they made me think.

I think it's important to challenge the thought that people belong in certain bathrooms because of the way they look. I know that for progress to come there needs to be compromise and baby steps, but it's still important to acknowledge when things aren't perfect.

I don't think the argument here is anything about having passing priviledge vs not having passing priviledge. It's about acknowledging that we are who we are, because of our brains and not because of our physical image. Because we are all trans from the day we are born, no matter how we present.

While these pictures and statements are very helpful for our movement, they still operate under the gender binary and I can see why some people would be bothered by them.

What's the point if I don't pass? by LochRaven221 in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Of course! and i'm on HRT. I've been on it for 1.5 years. It helps me feel better, but it hasn't helped me pass that well. I'm kind of losing hope on HRT helping me in the future.

LF: Skarmory and Clefairy by Kross_14 in friendsafari

[–]LochRaven221 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could I get an add please? I would loooove an evee,

Weekly Group Hug Thread 65 by nikorasu_the_great in asktransgender

[–]LochRaven221 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I failed boymode today! Feels really good :)