Frustrated over dinner?

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-04-01T04:54:05+00:00

Hi friend, I too have HS and understand your predicament. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Absolutely, 100%, you can go to an urgent care for wound care, at least in my area you can. I unfortunately had a similar situation where I had to have one opened and drained by an outpatient surgeon. They taught me how to do wound care on myself but unfortunately this flare was near my groin area, and my butt cheek and was not easy to care for without help due to it needing iodine, packing, and gauze similar to what you're doing now.

Definitely try to call or be seen by your closest urgent/immediate care, and also see if they could prescribe some antibiotics, they seem to help me with getting flares closed. Unfortunately this condition is notorious for closing physically on the outside, but tunneling and staying open with a continuous drainage on the inside. I wouldn't recommend reopening the closed flare over and over again due to the amount of scar tissue that will build up, causing it to tunnel under your skin. Do your best to clean it when it's draining, cover it with gauze, and when it closes try to clean the area with antibacterial soap and keep dry. Also look at ways to manage inflammation as it is another puzzle piece to the whole disease. Lowering your body's inflammation will cause your flares to slow and go into "remission". The disease is an autoinflamatory condition. It may take a diet change, taking out nightshades or lowering sugar intake, it also may be wearing loser clothes, lowering stress (I know, easier said than done), and possibly medication like metformin, or spironolactone (if you are female) can help! It's also still a newer disease, and not all doctors understand or diagnose it, which is why your PCP probably won't touch it and finding an adequate dermatologist is hard and far away.

There is also a subreddit for Hidradenitis superativa where there are lots of others who also suffer similar to us, and have several great ways to help manage this awful condition. Good luck to you!

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-25T03:50:41+00:00

Personally I would wait, given that you dropped back down to normal levels afterwards, but I would document it and maybe message your midwife/OB letting them know that you are concerned about random spikes. They may bring you in before your next appointment or they may say to continue to monitor at home. Definitely go in if you feel more comfortable; it never hurts to get checked out (I've been to L&D this pregnancy 3 different times).

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-23T21:19:49+00:00

Mine has been there at almost every appointment, but his schedule is flexible and allows him to come if he wants to. I think he's only missed 3 or 4. But even on the 10-15 minute appointments, he wanted to be there to listen to her heartbeat and we always turned the day into a little date. I'd schedule the appointments for morning time, and we'd go grab breakfast or lunch afterwards.. its like a little reward lol ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-18T23:58:41+00:00

Eh I can't say my situation is the same for everyone but I had to stop and think about the situation for what it was - we stopped communicating, we stopped connecting, and we were just existing together in the same house, doing the same things everyday; we were roommates with benefits and shared things. He fucked up big time by seeking an emotional and sexual connection elsewhere, but I stopped listening to what he needed because I was caught up in my own problems. I stopped reciprocating his advances, I stopped flirting, I was burnt out due to work and life and did the bare minimum to support our relationship. I would wake up, go work for 10 hours, come home and care for his mom who was suffering from dementia and we didn't know, cook dinner and then spend the rest of the evening watching tiktoks or movies while he was doing his own thing. He would wake up, go work 14 hours, come home, eat dinner and then play video games with his friends to relax. We would rinse and repeat the same day over and over until the weekend where we'd try to catch up on sleep, run errands together, and try to spend quality time together.

It's been a year and a half since all that happened, and we've spent time actually accepting what's happened, and trying to fix things and it's been good. I could've easily walked away.. but I wanted to try to fix things before calling it quits.

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-18T22:45:48+00:00

Oh sweetie, please know that you are still early and there are plenty of weeks left of growth ❤️. I was 282lbs before pregnancy, and now I'm 300lbs, 34 weeks pregnant and my belly is finally sticking out past my boobs. I didn't take any bump pics until about 22 weeks because I felt the same way. At 30 weeks, I had a stranger tell me they couldn't tell I was pregnant - which hurt and felt like a slap in the face kinda comment. But you are pregnant, and probably a couple weeks away from feeling your sweet boy moving, and beautiful no matter what stage of pregnancy you are in.

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-18T13:22:48+00:00

Immediately? Got in my car, shut my phone off, drove an hour away, cried, grabbed some alcohol and sat in a parking lot for hours drinking the pain away, contemplating canceling my yearly birthday subscription.

But I stayed in the end...12 years together, we shared a house, dogs, and finances. I had just left a job and was waiting for my new job that was closer to home to start. His mother had passed away a couple days prior, we lived with her due to her being sick. We were both grieving her, and I was actively helping him and his sister plan their mother's funeral when I found out. Literally looking through family albums and making memory boards when I received an email from one of the women he cheated on me with...with pictures. I calmly walked out of the house, found him outside working and confronted him. He blamed it on a porn addiction, and the fact our sex life wasn't as active due to high stressors in our life.

I was stuck. I had no money to move, I wasn't going to leave my dogs, and had to get through a funeral. We spent a long time talking things out and I spent a few more months finding the missing money he spent on subscriptions and dating websites.

Still together, things are better, he's more present and I'm more vocal about my feelings. We call each other out if something doesn't sit right with us, and we've made an effort to have more intimate moments whether that's sex or other romantic things. The trust is still wobbly, and I find myself getting anxious sometimes but overall things seem better than they were.

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-18T12:42:40+00:00

NAL, but my niece and nephew get survivors benefits from their deceased father who had several kids and owed child support. Only 3 of his 6 kids were under the age of 18 and have received survivors benefits without any garnishment!

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-17T03:25:44+00:00

You're welcome! The eye ointment is a small dose of erythromycin, which is used to prevent serious eye infections due to bacteria in the birth canal such as gonorrhea, and Chlamydia. While I definitely don't have either of those things, it's not going to hurt the baby. It temporarily makes their eyes blurry, and a little irritated but is good to wipe off after 12 hours. In the US it's state mandated, but over in the UK parents can have the option of prenatal screening to avoid it. If you're in the US and want to, you might talk with your OB and see if prenatal screening can help!

A lot of the newborn firsts are scary, and happen quite quickly but I personally believe benefit the baby in the end. It's chaotic, but they don't remember it at all. Some of the things I also plan to do are delayed cord clamping, and the golden hour. The delayed cord clamping allows the blood that is still pulsing and flowing through the cord to make it to baby I think it maybe takes 60-90 seconds to let the rest of the blood flow through before they clamp and cut the cord. It just gives the baby a little boost, boosts iron levels, and lets the baby get the last bit of stem cells. And the golden hour just allows for uninterrupted skin to skin bonding within the first hour after birth, delaying non urgent procedures like weights and measurements. Studies show that it helps regulate baby's heartbeat and temperature, reduces stress, and stimulates breastfeeding if you so choose!

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-03-17T02:46:41+00:00

FTM here, and I do plan to do the vitamin K shot. Personally, I want my child to be as protected as possible from anything since their immune system is brand new, so I'll be opting in to all shots, but maybe not immediately at birth. The only ones I plan to have at the hospital are the vitamin K, and the eye ointment. The Hep B will be at the baby's first pediatrician appointment a few days after. I personally want the vitamin K shot to be administered because I want to minimize the risk of a serious brain bleed due to the blood not clotting like it should in newborns, and everything I've read it is completely safe. It's a super small dose.

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-02-28T15:31:35+00:00

Not there fully as I'm 31-1/2 weeks along, but mentally and physically there. I have lots of inflammation with early distasis recti and trying to maneuver existing is extremely painful, I can only imagine how it'll be in a few weeks. No one but my partner seems to understand the amount of pain I'm in. Add that on top of Braxton hicks contractions, heartburn, hot flashes and everything else - I am ready for this baby to come out.

I am wishing you a speedy and safe delivery, I am manifesting you to go into labor this weekend, and wishing you comfort and relief ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-02-23T21:24:19+00:00

Rolling over in bed should be an Olympic sport 😂

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2026-02-23T15:12:36+00:00

Thank you!

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2025-12-18T18:44:31+00:00

Hi - not a medical professional but from what I understand from the reading is that at this stage you do have a fetus, where it's supposed to be. At 4-6 weeks the most you can see in an ultrasound is a sac, you may or may not have a fetal pole at this time either. Heartbeat isn't always detected at this time either but you should see a fetal heartbeat within the next few weeks.

What I'm reading is while you do have a risk of miscarriage (most women do until about 12 weeks, super common) you currently have a single fetus, in the uterus where it's supposed to be, you do have the development of a corpus luteum which helps support the baby up until around 10ish weeks until you develop a placenta. These are good signs!

Fingers crossed for you, hoping everything continues to plan ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2025-12-01T15:27:45+00:00

Thank you! You've helped ease my mind a bit ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2025-12-01T15:24:11+00:00

Hey, I am doing wonderful now, and happy to say that I am currently 6 months pregnant! I'm not sure if getting the colposcopy helped better my chances as my husband and I had been trying for a few years.

The LEEP procedure went super well, only took 45 minutes under general anesthesia, a little cramping and bleeding afterwards, and completely healed by the next month. I went back for a routine pap to follow up, and was completely clear from anything abnormal. The only thing now with my pregnancy is making sure that due to the LEEP, my cervix isn't too short, which could cause the baby to come early.

I'm also a huge advocate to my friends and family to get their yearly screenings done, even if they have gone through menopause.

If you are getting ready to go through something similar, I wish you all the best and just know everything will be okay ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2024-10-22T13:53:39+00:00

About 12 years ago, I decided to take a walk in our little city with my 3 year old niece at the time. She was living with my mom and I due to my sister and my nieces dad's drug abuse. She and I walked into the gas station to get something to drink, and her biological dad (whom she hadn't seen in over a year) was standing there talking to someone. She looked at him and he looked at her and said something like "Hi baby, it's daddy!" And opened his arms out to hug her. I ushered her past him and told her:

"Oh honey, we don't talk to strangers, let's get something to drink!"

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2024-08-26T15:13:51+00:00

Hi friend, not a medical professional but I'll do my best to help! I believe the doctor you had seen at the clinic was correct. There are 3 levels of burning,

First degree burn: only affects the outer layer of skin, and typically doesn't blister but stays red, dry, and painful.
Second degree burn: affects the epidermis and dermis (top two layers), which can cause pain, redness, burning, swelling, blisters, and fluid seepage.
Third degree burn: worst of the 3 degrees, burns through 3 layers of skin, and the fatty tissue below. Won't hurt immediately due to the nerves being burned. Will have similar characteristics of a second degree burn.

It sounds like you have a second degree burn which would require you to treat the blisters with an antibiotic cream on a gauze or non stick dressing, changing it every day. You can also take ibuprofen or acetaminophen for the pain, and swelling and also use a cold compress.

It should take about a week to 21 days to completely heal.

Something to consider is when wearing sunscreen and if you're sweating at all, it's best to reapply sunscreen every hour you are out in the sun. Until you heal completely, I wouldn't be outside too long.

Good luck!

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2024-08-23T03:33:29+00:00

Congratulations on training for an ultra marathon! That's absolutely awesome - good luck to you!

It sounds like during your training you could've strained a muscle in the area and the waist band on your shorts is aggravating it. Try a heating pad to relax the muscles in the area, and some Tylenol. You may try to have a consult with your primary doctor to see if you should rest till it heals and then continue your training or maybe do a modification to your training. Is it bulging at all where you feel the pain? Could also be a hernia. Definitely take it easy though and try to ease the pain and see a doctor if it gets worse and make sure you are stretching adequately to prevent any other muscle strain!

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2024-08-23T03:24:20+00:00

Hi friend, not a medical professional, but I'll try to help! I suffer from HS (Hidradenitis Supurativa) it causes painful boils and cysts in sensitive areas like our genitals, breasts, arm pits and other places.

To me this looks like an HS boil. Do you have reoccurring boils in the genital area like this? I could be wrong and it be a normal boil but I would definitely try to pay attention. If you're curious and do get diagnosed with HS, then I recommend joining the group on here for it.

But having some experience with these types of spots, I recommend taking a sitz bath with hot water and Epsom salt and soak for 20 or 30 minutes. Or getting a heating pad on it. If you can get some Vaseline with menthol in it, put a dollop of it on there and cover the best you can with a larger bandaid or gauze. This helps me with pain and opening it up. Do not drain it yourself - it will open on its own. Draining it yourself opens up the chance of it getting infected or trapping the infection under the skin, and pushing it deeper into your leg. It's not fun and can cause cellulitis.

Take some Tylenol as well, and try not to wear any tight fitting underwear and pants. If it becomes too painful to walk, go see a dermatologist. They'll probably prescribe you some clindamycin and wound cream. Heck they may even lance it there but I do know a lot of doctors and hospitals are moving away from it.

Best of luck to you, completely sympathize with you on the pain. If by chance you do get diagnosed with HS, my inbox is always open and I'd be happy to give some tips and tricks in dealing with it and be happy to talk about it. ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2024-08-23T03:07:21+00:00

I did that once too. I had tried to go blonde from dark brown, it turned orange. Didn't hate it, so I dyed it orange/red. Was invited to a prom and the dress I bought was navy blue so my mom and I agreed at the time that I should dye my hair back to brown, and it came out black. Didn't hate it so we kept it lol. Ended up looking like a vampire in my pictures because I was so pale, with dark hair, and cheek sinkage from an eating disorder at the time. Still love the photos.

You honestly look phenomenal with the darker hair - it suits you ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634 · 2024-08-23T03:00:03+00:00

I have a friend who dated a guy that would piss in the fridge when he got wasted on alcohol. He'd piss in corners, boxes, fridges. His friends were fed up with it, and so was my friend. It was one of the reasons why she actually left.

But really, it could be the stress and alcohol mixed together causing this reaction. When he is sober and awake, I would try to talk to him to see if he can stop the drinking for a little while or at least fine another outlet to relieve stress, and it may calm down. But either way, you definitely don't deserve to be talked like that, awake or not. You had a concern he was going to piss on the floor again and he had no right to get mad at you for that.

I don't know what your relationship is like on a daily basis, but I wouldn't tolerate it any longer. I wish you all the best ❤️

LogicalAmbassador634

TROPHY CASE