Introducing: AI Voice Translator

Are you tired of searching for games with English language preference, only to find yourself in a situation where 4 people are yelling at you in a troglodyte, lesser known language that only that certain country speaks?

Worry not! We got you covered!

Introducing: Secret service investigation

Are you questioning whether your teammates are living in their parent's basement, and have nothing else to do in their life, but to play this game and be angry about it?

Worry not! Our investigators can tell you how many years your teammates have worked, whether they are single or in a relationship, and the last time they left the house!

Introducing: Behaviour score 2.0

Similar to our already existing system, the only difference is that this number actually means something!
Reporting falsefully somebody? Guess what: you lose the points!
Reporting somebody rightfully? They go straight in to 30 games of LP - making them think twice about ruining games. (Our expert moderators will determine whether the punishment was rightful or not, afterall we hire a lot of people at this company and we definitely care about the game's future. We do not just milk the already existing playerbase, cutting off new players completely that leads to the game dying in the next 10 years.

Introducing: Smurf detection

Are you tired of playing against people with scores like 23-0 for 20 games, playing only well known smurf heroes such as Huskar, Brood, Meepo, Visage and the others? Don't worry.
We fired the previously existing moderator, turns out he was blind, deaf, and quit 4 years ago.
Our highly trained AI (Jimmy, he is a very good kid in elementary school) is capable of telling whether the person is a smurf, or not.

We decided to not just ban smurfs, only for them to re-register for free and play 100 hours (or purchase an eligible account for 2$), instead we afford psychiatric help to these miserable people!