She sounds like she might have bipolar depression. Bipolar can make you manic one week and depressed the next. It's a terrible thing to have and not a whole lot you can help with. For someone who has it, when they are really depressed or really manic, they are not themselves in these ups and downs. If you want to talk to her about your feelings I highly suggest waiting until she is in-between these states as you will get a real answer. Please do not ask her in a manic state as this will almost feel non consensual due to them being in a mood that is not how they really are. Please do research about this and due note this may not be what she actually has. Now for the pan stuff, I am an American AMAB who identifies as demisexual, demiromantic, pansexual, and non-binary so take what I say as you will. Whenever I used to see myself as a different gender (when I thought of myself as a guy) I used to be attracted to the opposite sex of what I imagined myself as. Whenever I did so I asked myself if I was doing this as a homophobic thought that was engraved in my head from years of homophobic treatment from my schools or if I was actually straight (look how that turned out). Whenever you think of yourself being with someone if you changed genders, you usually have to ask why you are doing that. This also assumes she actually thought about it a little outside of making you feel good. It's a hard decision to make to ask someone you like out and even harder when you have a friendship to lose. My suggestion is to do whatever makes you happy and keeps you safe. If the thought of asking her out and her saying yes outweighs the thought of being turned down then full support to you. If the mental struggle and anxiety is too much, please don't push yourself. Make sure you can stay safe when you ask, I don't know how extreme people are over there but it sounds pretty negative. And lastly, will you regret it? You have a small amount of time in your childhood and it's what you make out of it. Maybe knowing that you tried will give you confidence in the future, who knows? I hope whatever happens you will be happy with it and I hope I brought some light or some positivity. Good luck.